Would you be horrified if you had to stand up

[Elbels]

And eat dessert at a wedding?!

Current 'debate' between my mum and I. We're getting married at a venue with two spaces and need to clear out of the dining space so they can reset for the band and dancing.

My idea is that we move into a second room after the main course and have stand up dessert in small bowls or pots alongside teas and coffees. Mother dearest things is a terrible idea as there will be no tables in this room so how will people cope with eating and standing and heaven forbid holding a cup of tea for 30 mins.

Thoughts?

I think its the eating whilst standing up bit that is challenging for people. I agree that moving for coffee/tea would probably be fine.

At my brothers wedding we were asked to move outside whilst they reset the room We were outside in the cold and dark with nowhere to sit and no open bar or anything for 30 minutes! Thank God it wasn't raining!

The only way I can see it being OK to move from the main room for dessert and tea/coffee would be if there are bar style tables, the mid chest hight ones you can stand around. Otherwise have desset and then move through to the other room for tea/coffee as pps have suggested.

If I was a guest I'd think that you/venue were incredibly disorganised and had run out of time prompting a bodge, go to the other room to finish panic. Definitely wouldn't be impressed and likely to tell other people how crap it was.

I would want to sit down to eat but would be happy to stand up with a drink. Some people will need a chair for both though.

No one should be eating dessert standing up. Will there be children at your wedding? At mine we had the actual ceremony, 3 course meal and evening party in the same room. There was a 20 minute changeover in between where the guests waited in the reception and got offered tea/coffee/champagne. It wasn’t a problem at all and it only felt like we were out of the room for a few minutes they were so efficient. I certainly wouldn’t be expecting people to be getting up partway through their meal though and attempting to eat their dessert in reception while the room was flipped. How bizarre!

Terrible idea.

Eat at tables. Go to other room for coffee.

I find even low heels pretty uncomfortable but would make an effort to wear them for a formal occasion. If I had it sprung on me that I'd have to stand in them for half an hour I'd remember your wedding for all the wrong reasons.

Is there a garden? What time of year is it? We did an outdoor ice cream stall for dessert while they changed the room over, it was a big garden with lots of outdoor seating but it was summer. I wouldn’t want to stand in a room with no seats to eat and hold a drink.

Your mum is right, get over it.

Awful idea.

I think MN is almost unanimous .
I wouldn't want to have to stand for 30 minutes, let alone stand and eat. If there were no seats I'd probably leave.

Ah well, it's one way of sorting out the "oldies" from everyone else, as a couple of PPs think only they would object.

I'd happily identify as an oldie (not sure when that status starts) and so would various friends (from late teens upwards) I suspect - especially the odd pregnant one - if they didn't have to stand around "throwing" bits of pudding into their mouths.

However, from the balanced "I am totally right, mother dearest is mad not to agree with me" way you set out the "debate" OP, you may be feeling a bit surprised by the majority of the answers you've had.

You could always point out that, since you and OH are organising and paying for the wedding, it's up to you if you're happy for your guests to stand around with tea/coffee and bits of pudding.

Maybe could work if you had staff handing out tiny, canapé sized sweet bits and then serve tea and coffee at a separate table. You’d definitely need to ensure there was some seating for those who need it and the option of continuing to drink alcohol for those who want to.

It could be popular with those who had been stuck with dull table companions.

What about the speeches, though? Usually done after desert and, IMO, usually the best bit of the meal.

I’m with your mother on this. Let people sit down and enjoy the whole of their meal.

I’ve never heard of this happening before and if I was at a wedding, I’d think, what the hell are they doing?

So impractical!

Two hands needed for any dessert that involves a fork - scrub that, any dessert! Two hands needed for tea in a cup and saucer (I don't imagine they'll be handing out mugs). Where to put them when you're finished? Or do you just stand there waiting for a waiter to whisk it off you? All those naice weddingy outfits with clutch bags - what would you do with it? Clutch it between your stilettos, put it on the non-existent table, hand it to someone who's already finished?

"To a previous question no pregnant (yet) guests or people with health conditions that mean they couldn't stand."
And presumably no guest will be wearing new shoes bought specially for their new outfit? No-one in high heels?

And as for your "Mother dearest" and the whole tone of your post ... you sound nice.

wedding have enough standing around ( excruciatingly boring ) without having to eat your dessert at the same time

I wouldn;t be horrified but I wouldn't be happy with it either. For the amount of money you are paying for a venue for a wedding they should be catering to your needs and that doesn't mean forcing you and your guests to stand up to eat dessert. I'd insist they don't make you do this or look elsewhere, when they realise they are going to potentially lose your business they will suddenly be able to accommodate your request.

God people are precious! I'd be fine with it. Older people might not I suppose.

Those pesky old people with their declining health and preciousness.

I agree with everyone else. Finish eating at the dining tables, sitting down. By all means serve coffee / tea in the other room afterwards but let people finish eating their meals at the table.

I’d dislike this. I wouldn’t want to stand and eat dessert, I wouldn’t properly enjoy it or be able to relax; and if there are kids, you wouldn’t be able to keep them still or keep their desserts in their plates! Definitely have all 3 courses sitting down and then move everyone.

I wouldn't be horrified, but I'd probably just sit down cross-legged on the floor (dress permitting). My back doesn't do standing around for periods of time, even quite short periods of time. You wouldn't know it though. I can play tennis for 2 hours easier than 20 minutes standing around.

Daft idea. Listen to your mum.

Have the deserts and then move.

You say there are no tables in the other room - are there seats or is it just an empty room? How long would it take to set up the original room for the dancing? And can guests go back in there once it's done? It would be very odd and a bit rude to expect your guests to stand for a long period of time.

No don't do this, most people won't eat desserts and it'll waste your money

No sorry I wouldn’t like it. I am quite relaxed about eating but do like to sit down.