Feeling embarrassed after in-laws asked me to bring my own treats

[twentie]

I am so embarassed.

When I last went to stay with my in laws in Asia who are very wealthy people, they were very generous and kept saying, order whatever you want. They had an app where you could get pretty much anything delivered in 30 minutes.

I know they use this all day every day, freshly squeezed orange juice, cake, coffee.

They really emphasised they wanted me to use it. They got the bill and I really struggle with food.

So I did. And I ordered a freshly squeezed orange juice and my favourite bar of chocolate each day.

This chocolate costs £4 in the UK so is just a bit too expensive for me to enjoy here and I never buy freshly squeezed orange juice, because again it's too expensive. So this was luxurious.

But in this country the chocolate bar, because it's imported costs £6/7.

I really didn't think they minded as they kept asking if I wanted another one. Wanted me to feel welcome with my home comforts. It was lovely to feel a little bit of luxury, because I have been scrimping a bit at home and I never doubted that they could afford it as they ordered similar for themselves.

Well we're going back next week and I was really looking forward to the orange juice and chocolate.

MIL just message DP asking me to bring my own chocolate because I forgot last time and it was too expensive over there and cheaper here. And she has brought me oranges so I can squeeze my own juice, as it's cheaper.

I just feel so embarrassed. Like they thought I was being cheeky and couldn't tell me. I am mortified and wish I hadn't ordered anything.

But also feel so much less welcome. Why encourage me to use it so much if they thought that?

Also I know it may seem dramatic but I am not looking forward to go as much. Theres never really much for me to eat or drink over there as I really dislike the food they cook as I tend to like plain food. So knowing I can order these little snacks and drinks I really enjoy really perks me up and made my day.

Just a rant really

I would like to know what Asian county has local food that costs as much as you’re saying. Like local bakery items being similar price to imported dark chocolate.

I can see where PP are coming from with the guess that OP was eating normally, and is just embarrassed that she’s come across a cheeky and greedy

I'm really not, but believe whatever you like 😂

But how didn’t it feel cheeky to order a £6 chocolate bar and freshly squeezed juice every day?

I am also suspicious that we’ve all been had here. I can’t think of a place in Asia where sandwiches and meals on an app like this would be that expensive. The OP’s posts about really spicy local cuisine seem to suggest that we’re taking about South or Southeast Asia, but there’s nowhere in those regions where sandwiches start at £15 on a delivery app, not even in places like Singapore. I could see those kind of prices being a thing in the Gulf states, but the local cuisine there isn’t so heavily spiced. Either way, this no longer makes any sense at all.

I certainly don’t understand a culture that has an app for orange juice when you could just buy oranges and squeeze them anyway .

Imagine being so well off that you have staff etc, you don’t help your son out and they’re struggling to save for a mortgage, they then pay £3000 to come and see you and there’s an issue about a £7 bar of chocolate! I do think op needs to be more assertive about getting food she can eat or just don’t go but Jeeso, £7 a day for your guest which is repeatedly offered. OP either take your own snacks this time or don’t go

You can’t be that careful if you happily wolf down a bar of chocolate every day? I agree with a PP, I think you’re on the wind up. Nobody can be this dense.

I honestly can't understand your reasoning.

Ordering full meals wasn't offered to OP but ordering snacks was.

The only cheeky fuckery was the in-laws for not providing meals their DiL could eat. And then suggesting she bring her own chocolate with her on this upcoming trip.

I think we're gonna have to agree to disagree ❤️

Well no, I don’t, if I had staff on hand I’d be getting them to squeeze my orange juice lol

Deliveroo?

A lot of money.
Oh come on. It's an overpriced chocolate bar not a Bentley she's ordered. I'm not super rich and I don't think an £8 chocolate bar and an orange juice is a lot of money.
I'm shocked at how much of roasting OP is getting here.
Don't bother going back and save 3K

You proved it by not explaining how the OP is making the hosts pay when they and her DP encourage her to order from the app 😂

So you never went out over the door and there were no supermarkets where you could have bought veggies or bread?

Full meals WERE offered. Her DH told her multiple times to order a meal - she refused.

Nope, I've explained it many times - it's not my fault you lack the ability to understand it.

But that’s not the culture anywhere, never mind the uk.

I understand some people on here if a host offers then you just keep taking every day, but most people know at some point you say no of course not or order something lower cost.

I’ve never met anyone where basically a host says help yourself and then dive head first into thr most expensive stuff they can find.

I know, I don't get it either 😂

It wasn't the most expensive though was it. It was one of the cheapest thing on the menu.

Did you really have to type all of that out when this thread is already repetitive?

It might not make much sense to you but OP can only say what happened and from her account, which is the only one we have to go off, THAT IS WHAT HAPPENED!

Not liking that she ordered chocolate and OJ doesn't change the fact that she bought chocolate & OJ! OR the fact that she was repeatedly pushed to do so!

What other explanation do you need? She hated their food and lived off chocolate. That's it.

FFS her DH kept telling her to order pizzas etc and she didn't because they were too expensive but some of you are going on like she ordered the crown feckin' jewels!

She didnt buy it. Her in laws did.

I think everyone is just going to have to accept OP's reasoning, whether they understand it or not because we only have her word for it.

Threads where people just pick, pick, pick at the OP over little things just get boring.

It just derails the thread and gets so repetitive.

There do seem to be posters on here who genuinely don’t understand manners.

Fwiw when a host offers you something repeatedly out of politeness, you have to consider whether it’s polite to accept. Once or twice ok, but not daily, repeatedly.

If you’re the kind of classless person who goes woah great they’re loaded treat/perk/freebie!!! then don’t be surprised if you don’t get invited back, or the host sets boundaries round your stay.

How much did you spend on their parents when you took them out for a meal and how does this cost stack up against what you spent on the app?

Well this is part of the bafflement. 15 pounds for a sandwich, 8 pounds for a baked good.. Many of us can't think which country this might be as the OP refuses to share this detail.

I just can't imagine a bowl of rice and some chopped tomatoes weren't on offer, or a breakfast buffet - given there was an industrial kitchen full of staff.

At this point I am starting to think everyone involved is unreasonable because my imagination doesn't stretch to a scenario that involves a mansion in Asia, full of staff and an industrial kitchen, occupied by rich people who sit around all day ordering beverages and snacks from an app, while their meek guest from overseas, suffers and only staves off malnutrition by ordering over-priced British chocolate that the hosts begrudgingly pays for.

At least the rude, grabby people have made themselves obvious