Talks about reconciliation 2

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I've never started a thread here before, but I thought some people might be interested in this take on the story by a PR podcast I listened to yesterday (started listening to this podcast as I know very little about PR!).

It would be good to know if any of the resident PR people agree.

When It Hits The Fan: A Right Royal Whodunnit

If this has been quietly in the pipeline I can see the Wales skipping more family gatherings, especially Catherine. I'm hopping at a father level none of this is because of the Waleses popularity. But equally would add to the soap opera. Those in the media pushing this seem to have no holding back that Williams not onboard, which questions if both sides are leaking it maybe a joint message. William as the bad guy, which cannot be for monarchy survival as it's self sabotage. Charles would be ecstatic as Williams and Catherine press coverage for him and Camilla.

I think it was more the fact it was felt that the Sussexes, who let’s remember were only accidentally here when the late Queen died, were better to be kept where the RF knew what they were up to. I think it was the right thing to do as, given that they were here, it was best not to look petty by excluding them. I’ve seen a few theories bandied about as to how it came to be, including that it was William’s idea 🤷‍♀️
I do think it was a bit of an eye opener for Meghan as to what the monarchy actually represented in this country, however faux her doe eyed, frightened persona was (and it was definitely mostly an act)

I think I saw one post on X saying that they will support Meghan with whatever decision she makes , no mention of Harry though, they seem to back M more than H .

I think the media coverage and the Sussexes' activity will ensure that they very much feature at some level in your average person's mind. I don't think it's just us here on the RF board. In fact I would go as far to say that people who hear coincidentally about them will hear more of the negative about them as opposed to any positive there may be.

Agree. Also note OW doing an unprecedented urgent smash and grab exclusive interview with Gayle King the morning after QE2 died, once she saw the global out-pouring of respect for QE2 and realised she was on the wrong side of history. Distasteful.

Also spotted that Gayle King was wheeled out to clear up after the OW interview and is on record saying 'well of course if PP had died earlier M&H would have rescheduled the broadcast' - how very gracious and sensitive of them......

I agree wholeheartedly Randy !
sick of the idea that the victim has to be the “bigger” person, about time that the person who caused all this suffering was held accountable.

I heard the same thing. William invited H and MM to join them because otherwise they would have done their own and the optics would have been terrible. I don’t agree Kate looked furious btw, I think she was under enormous strain, different thing.

I’d go further and say that of those who remember Diana, only those who were reasonably young at the time are left. Our perspective on her is likely to be much changed by our own life experience.

The worship for Diana isn’t there any more, except amongst a few obsessives and collectors of memorabilia. I doubt there is even much affection left, just curiosity at best. Being Diana’s son means nothing to anyone, any more than being the child of any other long dead celebrity.

I believe they wanted to have it filmed by Netflix too! , honestly they are lucky that their plan didn’t work!
can you imagine the reaction from the crowd if they had gone out by themselves with a film crew?

I don’t think the footage would have helped them at all!

I understand what Spanakopita means about the average person not being as bothered about them as these threads might suggest, but even the most casual observer would surely find stunts like that a bit much!

Yes I agree I just don’t understand why the Palace PR think the public will be delighted with Harry returning in any way whatsoever, it’s pretty much two fingers to people who have supported and defended the royals, but it’s not just about what Harry has done to the individuals concerned and the institution, but to the country and the British public on the world stage, branded as racists and Empire 2.0. If Harry comes back, the Palace are fools and frankly the next edition of Spare The Return, is on them.

My understanding is that the joint walkabout was Charles' idea and he called William and asked William to contact Harry.

I think there can be a mismatch in what we define as Harry being reconciled.

I don't believe it means back as a working royal, up on the balcony, funded by the King with increased security.

I suspect that what Charles and his advisers are probably working towards is: comes to Sandringham and Balmoral occasionally, might turn up at a Garden party but not be in the official Instagram post, will attend important services like the Commonwealth service a couple of rows back, basically a male Beatrice and Eugenie. A reconciliation between father and son, which would i believe be a good thing and which removes the capacity for future guilt.

I'm not sure it will work because I do believe the reports that Harry wants diary synchronisation and upgraded security, neither of which i think will be on the table. I might be wrong though, what do you think about those @GiveMeSpanakopita

I don't see Charles going back on the refusal of half in half out, or getting involved with RAVEC's decisions or basically anything that would have repercussions for King William or bring Harry back as a working royal. Whilst Harry is in no way in the same heinous category as Andrew I do think the way the late Queen reached decisions about him, in consultation with her heirs and her advisers, is a model Charles will follow.

This is brilliantly put.

I really hope the RF’s PR is aware of this.Those who care about the monarchy don’t want a reconciliation with H&M. If they imagine H is still loved as a cheeky chappie they are totally out of touch. If they choose to pander to H & M’s fans, they’ll find them a very unsupportive lot and I should think W & C will walk!

I hold on to hope that no such rapprochement is on the cards!

I think all that is still way too risky for the RF. After seeing them both wearing their ‘concealed’ mics at the Platinum Jubilee service, they surely can’t be allowed anywhere near royal occasions or the RF themselves.

I don't think they were wearing microphones but even if they were, in public the royals are very used to watching what they say. They will simply continue to be careful. Harry and Meghan will be in the category of people who they can't be open with. Probably not the first or the last in the family.

I put this Q into ChatGPT:

"What are the stages of reconciliation for a family after an estrangement?"

Response;

Reconciliation after family estrangement is a complex, emotional, and non-linear process. While each situation is unique, the journey can often be understood in stages. These stages don't always occur in a strict order, and people may revisit certain stages multiple times. Here's a general framework:

1. Reflection and Preparation (Individual Work)
Before any contact is made:
Understanding the estrangement: Each person reflects on what happened, why, and how it affected them.
Ownership and accountability: Recognizing their own role in the conflict (if any), without over-responsibility.
Setting intentions: Clarifying what they want from reconciliation—peace, contact, boundaries, or something else.
Emotional readiness: Building emotional resilience, possibly with a therapist or support group.

2. Initiating Contact (The Reaching Out Phase)
Low-stakes outreach: A letter, email, or message to test the waters.
Softening the approach: Avoiding blame; using non-defensive, empathetic communication.
Consent-based connection: Respecting if the other party isn't ready or willing.

3. Initial Conversations (Testing the Waters)
Surface-level communication: Conversations may start light or logistical (e.g., updates, greetings).
Careful emotional calibration: Gauging each other’s emotional state and openness.
Mutual curiosity: A willingness to understand the other person’s story without judgment.

4. Truth-Telling and Acknowledgment (Core Repair Work)
This is often the hardest stage:
Sharing experiences: Both sides express how the estrangement affected them.
Acknowledging harm: Without defensiveness, listening and validating pain.
Apologizing: Sincere apologies when appropriate—not to win, but to heal.

5. Rebuilding Trust (Ongoing and Slow)
Consistency: Trust grows through repeated, positive interactions over time.
Setting and respecting boundaries: Clear, negotiated limits are crucial.
New patterns: Creating new ways of relating, not repeating old dynamics.

6. Redefining the Relationship
Adjusting expectations: The relationship may not return to its former state—and that's okay.
New normal: Establishing what the relationship looks like now (frequency of contact, emotional depth, etc.).
Acceptance: Letting go of the ideal and embracing what is possible and healthy.

7. Maintenance and Growth
Ongoing communication: Regular check-ins and emotional honesty.
Conflict management: Learning to navigate disagreements without rupture.
Celebration of progress: Recognizing how far you've come together.
Important Notes:
Not all estrangements should end in reconciliation. Sometimes, the healthiest outcome is a peaceful distance or limited contact.
Therapeutic support can be essential, especially during stages of truth-telling and repair.
Time is a critical factor—healing cannot be rushed.

Found the framework really interesting - and in the RF's situation would need to overlay with all the complexities and enmeshment of the various fueds - the sibling rupture, the parental rupture, the IL rupture (PC&MM), the step-parent issue (QC) (then the secondary tensions caused between KC3, QC, PW, PC and no doubt between MM & PH) - then the agendas beyond the pure family dynamics of The Institution alongside the international geopolitical / security concerns - throw in poor MH, old unresolved childhood traumas, potential substance abuse, folie a deux relationship, alienation, isolation, manipluation, $$$$$ issues, unexpected life-changing physical health crises alongside MSM and SM whipping up drama and its a very volatile and heady cocktail. I am not sure they will ever get out of stage 1 - and the last point "Not all estrangements should end in reconciliation. Sometimes, the healthiest outcome is a peaceful distance or limited contact." is valid for many in this mix and might be as far as it goes.

Apparently there was ZERO conversation in the car and I’m not surprised.

And Meghan couldn’t even behave on that walk about, snapping nastily at an aide until she saw the camera, after which she very quickly turned on the ‘charm’.

C has said it was one of the most difficult things she’s ever had to do and I can believe it. Imagine sharing a car with the person/people who had accused you of racism to a global audience. Nice! How H& M had the gall to appear, I don’t understand.

I think the RF may be laying the ground for a post divorce situation.

If you watch the video it’s very obvious they both had something under their collars. At one point you actually see H’s, and Meghan never stops fiddling with her collar and feeling for something underneath. They must think we are idiots.

On that occasion M had had Dior copy an outfit worn by Wallis Simpson too, so whatever message that was meant to convey, it can’t have been a friendly one!

Also, Tom Bower is allegedly working on a new book. The SS actually called the police and tried to have him evicted from Invictus in Canada.

H & M have not endeared themselves to Americans. Harry got booed at the Pat Tidwell awards. Hollywood A listers ignore them. They have been called disaster tourists. It's a running joke that H & M will pull some kind of stunt at major RF events.

They are starting to look really tacky of touch. Millions in the US are facing starvation. We have to deal with ICE raids. People and animals are dying in floods and fires, and Harry is cosplaying his mother in Angola.

C has said it was one of the most difficult things she’s ever had to do

Where / when did she say this?

That would make sense. I can’t bear Harry (full stop) but while his loyalty is firstly to Meghan there just cannot be any relaxation of vigilance.

Yes, I realise Meghan would retaliate by making access to his children difficult but that’s for H to worry about about. I think the RF shouldn’t even try to get involved with the children- they can live happily in the US and ignore their royal connections. KC has the Wales three anyway.

It’s very widely reported but I’ll look for a link.

I saw Meghan fiddling but I think it is because it was a high stiff collar and she was uncomfortable. It's the fiddling that makes me less inclined to believe there was a microphone. If they were really wired I don't think they would have behaved like that.