Best advice for Harry going forward?

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I have all the same initial reactions as many others on MN regarding Harry i.e. whiner, grifter, stupid, entitled etc and it's easy to dole out the criticism.

However while I wouldn't say I have sympathy for him, as so much of his situation is of his own making, I actually do have some underlying feelings of concern for him and his future (and children).

He reminds me an awful lot of a relative of mine who is neurodiverse with a mild learning disability and a tendency to be self-absorbed with an overdeveloped victim complex - always lashing out, blaming others, seeing conspiracy where there is none etc.

Harry is clearly a damaged man, with childhood trauma and issues which continue to plague his mental health.
As with my relative, he has grown up with a support network which has probably quietly managed and enabled his passage through life, but when big outbursts happen (as have happened in our family too) everyone backs off and 'grey rocks' him until he has calmed down. Some people just give up, too exhausted by the constant drama of it all.

Doria doesn't get a look in. Not in name or in looks. The children take after Diana or nothing.

Fetishising Diana.

My advice to Harry is to change his daughter's name to Elizabeth Doria Diana.

Now that would have been fun and modern - and have her called Eddie for everyday. (EDDie)

IMHO, H&M should have given their daughter a first name less loaded with very recent family drama/legacy. There are plenty of names such as Eleanor or Caroline that would make it easier for the child to develop her own identity without the endless comparisons to her paternal great-grandmother or her paternal grandmother.

Just to be clear: I too think very badly of them for the brazen cheek of them using the name Lilibet. It grates hugely every time I hear it and I bet the RF are pretty pissed off about it too. If reports are to be believed, the Queen was too. But I also believe that the media are deliberately reminding us of it.

Naming the daughter Lilibet was perhaps to make damm sure everyone would know who she is.
H&m do know kids grow up and read for themselves on the Internet, presumably they don't care about that either.

Ref the recent pic on a night out, aren't they just trying a bit too hard? Megsy looks as if she's been getting ready for two weeks and harry as if he forgot he was going.

He looks a right plonker with that hat on, meghan really doesn't like him, does she? He looks drunk and on a promise to me, especially agreeing to wear the hat.

Also, no one puts little love notes in the hat of their husband of 7 years. And they have kids and in their forties. They aren't bloody teenagers. It's not cute. It's weird behaviour, seeing what a fucking mess they are in. Buggering about with little notes:)

I know. It’s beyond cringe.

Meghan is 43 trying desperately to act 23.

Never a truer word said. It’s all so desperately try too hard.

Yes it’s so bizarre. The living grandmother can’t compete with the dead one.

This is such painful reading.

archive.ph/tDGE1

Lilibet was such a private and personal thing that was between TLQ and her most special people. It feels like that was taken from her so soon after Phillip was taken from her. She must have been devastated.

And the letters from Schillings!! Mind blowing but typical H and M.

Every time I see the name Lillibet, I just think what a pair of cheeky fucking stalkers they are. So greedy they even stole a pet name from a woman they hurt badly, and whose legacy they continue to shit all over

The only thing I’d changed about your post is your polite use of stalkers instead of another one beginning with b and ending in d. But apart from that all I’ll say is

AMEN!!!!!

"The media are deliberately reminding us of it"
How?
Stop blaming "the media" for choices made my H&,M.

Do we think that H&M will ever take responsibility for what they have said and done?
So many things.
I think it's awful that they have named their daughter Princess Lilibet. It was their choice, a deliberate choice and theirs alone.

Now now everyone, you’ll have posters on here saying no one owns a name. Not even a Queen. It was very low of the pair. It was a very deliberate and calculated move to hurt. How some don’t see it is beyond me.

I agree. Blaming the press for it, though! 😂
Straight from the Sussex playbook.

It's an ownership thing. To continue the Only Fools & Horses parallel, a darker (but still legitimate, I think) reading of Del writing Rodney's name in his coat and thereby damaging Rodney's chances of getting his leg over with Cassandra, is Del claiming ownership over Rodney and seeking to prevent Rodney from striking out and making an independent life of his own. Toxic codependency is the central psychological theme of the series although, in the vein of all the best comedic writers from Aristophanes onwards, OFAH allows the audience to confront a common source of human suffering and laugh defiantly at it.

Meghan has unwittingly demonstrated the same scenario. She claims ownership. "He's not yours, you evil racist Royals! He HATES you! He's mine! ALLL MIIIIIINNNNEEE!"

Also, who the fuck these days presents 'Africa' as a single entity? How can a vast, diverse and increasingly powerful and wealthy continent possibly be reduced to a line drawing? As much as I despise Progressive theories, this stinks of white saviourism.

"Oh yaaaaaaah, I love Africaaaa, doncha know. Yah, I'm the saviour of Africaaaaa. Africaaaaa is my jam."

If that whole IG reel was meant to be a clever PR response to the sheer embarrassment of Harry's SW London odyssey and random doorbell ringing, it's failed utterly.

My reading of the doorbell scenario: the light is morning light. Harry's very obviously in last night's suit. I'd be willing to put a fair wedge on betting that he was at a raucous party on that street the night before, a party at which he came by that nose bump and shiner he was subsequently sporting in his Beeb rant. I am sure any fellow former hard partiers on this thread also know that feeling of waking up, strung out on a massive comedown, and realising that you left something very important (passport, wallet) at the party last night. You vaguely recall the street, but not the actual house, because you were spannered. So you dismiss most of your security detail and wander up and down the street, knocking on doors that look vaguely right, until someone takes pity and points you in the right direction.

Chump.

Calling her Elizabeth is fair enough. That's the Queen's name. Lillibet was the girl's name and should have been left alone.

MayaKovskaya · Today 06:22

NewAgeNewMe · Today 05:58
Now now everyone, you’ll have posters on here saying no one owns a name. Not even a Queen. It was very low of the pair. It was a very deliberate and calculated move to hurt. How some don’t see it is beyond me.
I agree. Blaming the press for it, though! 😂
Straight from the Sussex playbook.

It was definitely a crass move.

But I can't decide whether it was a calculated act of aggression - a way of saying 'We'll do what we like and we don't care about anyone's feelings', or if it was an ill-judged attempt to curry favour with the late Queen.

I assume Harry must have told Meghan about the Queen's childhood pet-name (after all, Meghan knew NOTHING about the RF before she met Harry 😃). He is so dim that he probably thought it would flatter his grandmother for their daughter to be called Lilibet. In fact, I think the Queen was very hurt and felt her privacy had been trampled on. Also - a childhood pet-name is sometimes unique - and people are rightly possessive about things like that. I know my children had such names and I'd hate it if someone else used them!

It could be all-of-a-piece with their strategy of trying to flatter the late Queen and PP while insulting Charles, Camilla and the Waleses - when they may have thought the Queen would go on for many more years like her mother!

@CoffeeCantata I think the latter. They were very keen to keep in with the Queen for their own benefit, and lack any sort of self awareness or empathy so I don't think it would have occurred to them that Lillibet was inappropriate.

Harry seems to have very little understanding of how the institution works, and very little interest in learning. It is quite possible he didn't know about the origins and history of the nickname and never bothered to ask. Just assumed the Queen would be delighted with the esteemed honour of her private name being used for their own advantage.

Absolutely not the media at all, the Sussex.com bio of Meghan says

"Meghan lives in California with her husband and their children Prince Archie and Princess Lilibet."

Also this

When reached by PEOPLE, a spokesperson for the Duke and Duchess of Sussex said: "I can confirm that Princess Lilibet Diana was christened on Friday, March 3 by the bishop in the Episcopal Diocese of Los Angeles, the Rev John Taylor."

I don't know why the media get blamed. H&M want her to be called Princess and they want her to be called Lilibet.

I never read that Telegraph article, thank you for posting it, it reemphasises how absolutely egocentric they are.

Lililbet is a silly name, fine as a nickname but as a first name it sounds twee. Not a female founder kind of name 😄Agree Harold and Meggie probably thought the queen would be moved and flattered 😂

Agree it was a sweet and specific nickname which does not translate as an actual name, imagine being a grown woman named Lilibet.

Ever the ingenue act.

What’s going to happen when her daughter is the young one with the looks?