Best advice for Harry going forward?

[SandyThumb]

I have all the same initial reactions as many others on MN regarding Harry i.e. whiner, grifter, stupid, entitled etc and it's easy to dole out the criticism.

However while I wouldn't say I have sympathy for him, as so much of his situation is of his own making, I actually do have some underlying feelings of concern for him and his future (and children).

He reminds me an awful lot of a relative of mine who is neurodiverse with a mild learning disability and a tendency to be self-absorbed with an overdeveloped victim complex - always lashing out, blaming others, seeing conspiracy where there is none etc.

Harry is clearly a damaged man, with childhood trauma and issues which continue to plague his mental health.
As with my relative, he has grown up with a support network which has probably quietly managed and enabled his passage through life, but when big outbursts happen (as have happened in our family too) everyone backs off and 'grey rocks' him until he has calmed down. Some people just give up, too exhausted by the constant drama of it all.

Did anyone try to stop him? I seem to remember a sizeable wedding with the late Queen and the rest of the Royal family present and a carriage ride round Windsor.

Hardly opposition.

I guessed that you meant "mouths" not "mounts", but what should Harry's family have kept their mouths shut about?

Eta What did they say to try to stop him marrying her?

Did anyone try to stop him? I seem to remember a sizeable wedding with the late Queen and the rest of the Royal family present and a carriage ride round Windsor.

And a lavish to the point of vulgar wedding reception hosted and paid for by Charles.

The only thing that was (supposedly) said that we know of was that William suggested Harry slow down and take a bit more time. But if he said it at all, it was in a private conversation, which Harry told the world about.

I always assumed she meant she didn't know him, in the same way I know of Prince William but do not literally know him and not that she literally didn't know Prince Harry existed and who he was.

But I could of course be wrong. The context will add detail

Megyn Kelly said the other day MM knew who Harry was. Because her ex, Trevor, told a mutual acquaintance that MM had a vision board with Harry on it.

She wrote in the Tig about William and Catherine's wedding. Considering the attention on Pippa and Harry in the media coverage, I doubt very much she wasn't aware of who he was.

TBF Harold's the only one so far to have recounted any mounts 🙂

Well yes and no. Harry, being a senior Royal, is in a slightly different position to other people. His new bride was to be come part of “the firm” and as such was expected to fulfill a constitutional role. Such a life is not for everybody. It was up to Harry to ensure that the woman he wanted to marry was completely au fait and comfortable with this. I get the distinct impression that members
of the family were not convinced this was the case, and wanted to make Harry reflect on it. As we know, he wasn’t keen on this, Meghan
was not prepared for her new life and the rest is history. Like it or not, Harry was not entirely free to marry who he wanted, without making sure that they were ok in becoming a member of the RF

He was free to marry who he wanted - because he did.

MM was v keen to become part of The Firm - she wrote to PC saying she would hit the ground running.

They then decided they wanted to generate $$$$$ in the commercial world and they were not held back from doing so.

Harry freely recounts how he told his Dad not to marry Camilla.
Yet more hypocrisy.

Harry decided to tell the world in Spare that his brother only married Catherine because she was compliant and not for love. So he and his supporters are in no position to complain about anyone talking about his marriage.

Another example of the nasty content in that book. I suppose he just wanted to make $millions and didn't care about who he hurt.

A vision board with Harry ? 😂 it does sound funny when put like that!

.

I have not read the book or paid close attention to reviews and criticism of it.

If that's true that is very cruel. I'm shocked that he would write such a thing for public consumption. At one point he seemed fond of Catherine, what on earth made him do such a nasty thing?

I'm now wondering if stress made her ill.

I think it was more about the real love he felt for Meghan that eclipsed all, she cast herself as Snow White, even down literally to the talking & singing animals.

GreenApplesRedApplesYellowApples · Today 06:21

RandyRedHumpback · Yesterday 22:48
Harry decided to tell the world in Spare that his brother only married Catherine because she was compliant and not for love. So he and his supporters are in no position to complain about anyone talking about his marriage.
I have not read the book or paid close attention to reviews and criticism of it.
If that's true that is very cruel. I'm shocked that he would write such a thing for public consumption. At one point he seemed fond of Catherine, what on earth made him do such a nasty thing?
I'm now wondering if stress made her ill.

Slightly off topic of the thread, but I agree. Catherine's dignity, grace and resilience alone in the face of what's been said about her by H & M would win my admiration. I'm not in any way a 'fan girl', but she has behaved impeccably. She wasn't born in the RF, so wouldn't be used to the routine personal attacks from the press and others - I'm sure they have to grow thick skins. The horrible slanders/libels against her by H & M (and especially H, who'd been a close friend) must have been traumatic.

As far as the Sussex Squad are concerned - on Celebitchy, for example - Catherine is a vicious racist who bullied Meghan. They call her KKKate and worse. I honestly don't think I could survive that kind of thing and carry out a public role.I would be in counselling permanently and refuse to appear in public.

She has done brilliantly, and I think sensible people, be they monarchists or republicans, will surely have sympathy for her.

Totally agree.

I thought at the time unnecessarily cruel and hurtful. And then the racist allegations. Kate has more strength and dignity in her little finger than Harry has in his entire body.

Yes - just because T Markle junior may not be a very nice man doesn't mean he isn't right in this case! 😃

The whole Markle tribe do seem to be a quarrelsome, petty, dysfunctional lot. It seems more and more likely that Meghan kept Harry away from them because they knew where the bodies were buried and wouldn't hold back in telling him - especially if they thought they could ruin her little scheme for world domination.

He certainly didn't hold back in that book. I would find many of the unfounded accusations and unpleasant claims very hard to come back from.

He has no dignity, just a massive sense of entitlement and victimhood.

I think the voice of Meghan can be heard loudly in the background both in Spare and in the Omid Scobie oeuvre. She poured gallons of poison in H's and Scobie's ears. Clearly she had Catherine particularly in her sights from way back and went about a systematic character assassination of her on several fronts.I mean - the bitchy comments started on her blog when talking about the royal wedding in 2012. It's been a long campaign!

How anyone can't see this baffles me.

He has too much time on his hands. Get busy, get a proper job with a boss organising the day.

Oh wow. Any links to the bitchy comments?

I’ve always felt Meghan was lying about not being aware of the royal family / royal protocol.

What a poseur and loser she is.

In terms of PR, I can think of no better advice I would give to Harry than Attlee's immortal admonishment to Laski: "A period of silence on your part would be welcome."

I did once advise a client, who was really being dragged through the mud, to go completely silent for 6 months, not read his bad press, stop flailing around publicly, reflect on what he'd learned from his painful experience and get therapy, After which we could discuss a PR strategy. Somewhat reluctantly, he did and it worked wonders. There comes a point when you have to recognise that no one has much sympathy for your side of the story, and so you have to stop flogging it and do something different.

Harry needs to do this, because right now he's basically exhibiting all the symptoms of a stalker. The stalker cannot accept that the object of their obsession isn't interested in them. So they harass their victim, because in their benighted brain, being annoying is better than being ignored.

Harry is employing exactly this twisted strategy on the RF and the British public. Ha cannot accept that we're just not that into him anymore. We, and the RF, have moved on.

He needs to take some time off to properly internalise this.