Best advice for Harry going forward?

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I have all the same initial reactions as many others on MN regarding Harry i.e. whiner, grifter, stupid, entitled etc and it's easy to dole out the criticism.

However while I wouldn't say I have sympathy for him, as so much of his situation is of his own making, I actually do have some underlying feelings of concern for him and his future (and children).

He reminds me an awful lot of a relative of mine who is neurodiverse with a mild learning disability and a tendency to be self-absorbed with an overdeveloped victim complex - always lashing out, blaming others, seeing conspiracy where there is none etc.

Harry is clearly a damaged man, with childhood trauma and issues which continue to plague his mental health.
As with my relative, he has grown up with a support network which has probably quietly managed and enabled his passage through life, but when big outbursts happen (as have happened in our family too) everyone backs off and 'grey rocks' him until he has calmed down. Some people just give up, too exhausted by the constant drama of it all.

Doria had/has two older maternal half siblings , a brother Joseph who died in 2000 and a sister Saundra Johnson. She also has a younger paternal half brother Joffrey Ragland. Meghan grew up knowing these people. In fact in this photo which is out there it quotes her Uncle Joseph as saying she was raised with love by all of them. Her Grandfather originally came from Tennessee and her Grandmother from Ohio. Doria was born in Ohio and moved to LA as a teenager.

https://macleans.ca/facebook-instant-articles/why-most-of-meghan-markles-family-wont-make-it-to-the-royal-wedding/

Dear @BigWillyLittleTodger , sorry to ask , but could you DM me the Euromillions numbers . I'd be awfully grateful. My eldest DS is trying to buy his first flat and not being in receipt of a NF contract & DH & I not being members of the RF , we could do with a few quid to help him out.
TIA

😂

The late Queen suggested a quiet wedding being of the generation where divorced people don’t have large weddings but H ( and I assume M ) wanted the works . In Spare , H said he/ they wanted Westminster Abbey or St Paul’s.

Both of Meghan's mother and father have filed for bankruptcy. Maybe she doesn't want this to be known either. It was inevitable that her past would be dug over.

The late Queen suggested a quiet wedding......

Thinking about it, for a woman of deep Christian faith, as the Queen was, it must have been distasteful, even distressing, to realise that M planned to use a religious ceremony as a means of self-promotion, with all those invites to A-Listers she didn't know. (At the time I assumed she did know them.)

The late Queen's face said it all.

Personally I think St George's Chapel is the nicest of the "Royal venues" . Didn't the Queen suggest Tewkesbury for H ? . Westminster Abbey or St Pauls would have been quite inappropriate for them given as others have said it wasn't a state occasion. But then I think Frogmore cottage when made into one house is once of the nicest of the Royal residences. With the security cordon , lovely looking gorgeous garden and big enough whilst still being on a human scale. & They could have had a glamourous apartment in KP (either / or not sure about that ) but there would have been no problem about a country house being put at their disposal for family time.

I joked above - but I don't think H realises what 9.99999 % of people have to do to have a nice flat let alone a big house or apartment . I know it is what his family knows , and I do get that , but to say can't come here "because security" when there are various Royal residences they could stay in with the accompanying security does not sit well with me. One thing I have read William has said is "no more houses". I think something he could do in time is perhaps take some of the Crown (not personal ) properties and rent them out with the income going directly to the Govt . Or if ( which I would favour) if the rule whereby the monarch cannot hand down an inheritance tax free then they sell some of the properties to pay the IHT. Anyway that will take some scrutiny and will , but seriously the RF do not need all the houses they have. (And I speak as one who favours a constitutional monarchy)

Seeing as you asked so nicely I will PM you the numbers, keep them to yourself though, we don’t want this lot on here getting wind of them! 😂 💰💰 💰

If Harry was accurately recalling that conversation and that’s always in doubt, he said he was talking to William about where the wedding would be held and William suggested Tetbury Chapel near Highgrove - but Harry said it would be too small and suggested Westminster Abbey or St Paul’s.

Harry says that William’s response was no to Westminster because that was where he and Kate were married and no to St Paul’s because it was where Charles and Diana got married.

Why was William talking around the issue - why didn’t he just say that a big London cathedral was far too grand a venue for a (non heir) grandchild of a monarch.

This seems to be part of the issue - it wasn’t even William’s job to still be ‘parenting’ Harry.

At the point Harry asked the Queen for permission to marry and she said yes, then she and Charles should have sat Harry down and explained the available parameters based on his situation.

I have a feeling @wordler, that Harry flying off the handle and getting angry , confronting and aggressive when told things he doesn’t like and can’t have is not a new phenomena!.
And possibly unfairly the job of softening the blow fell to William!

Harry says that William’s response was no to Westminster because that was where he and Kate were married and no to St Paul’s because it was where Charles and Diana got married.

I don't think William could make such decisions for a start, only the late QE. I think Harry was miffed because Anne and Andrew got the Abbey for their first weddings, which ignores the facts that a) they were children of the reigning Monarch and b) it was first marriages for all parties involved.

I know. It's just so silly, all these lies.

I agree that MM step siblings are grim ... but was Thomas Markle jr letter to PH a month before the wedding prophetic?

“As more time passes to your royal wedding, it became very clear that this is the biggest mistake in royal wedding history, Meghan Markle is obviously not the right woman for you...she is a jaded, shallow, conceited woman that will make a joke of you and the royal family heritage.”

They are half siblings and yes he seems to have the measure of her.

Actually for those who say the RF did not their best to welcome Meghan. She and Harry were allowed to get married in St George's Chapel , when the current POW now KC was not. Before anyone says - yes there was the fact that KC would be the head of the CoE but I do think that H&M could reflect that they were given things which others weren't. I am sure this took HLMTQ something to agree to this. I thought she (M) was treated pretty well by the RF actually. Well , in terms of how they publicly accepted her. Behind the scenes - we may never know.

“As more time passes to your royal wedding, it became very clear that this is the biggest mistake in royal wedding history, Meghan Markle is obviously not the right woman for you...she is a jaded, shallow, conceited woman that will make a joke of you and the royal family heritage.”

bloody hell, he was on the money there 😮😮

.

“Waity Katie.”

How would she have known that quite specific royal tabloid nic-name from years before if she had no knowledge of the RF?

Quite.

Most people had forgotten that nasty little slur until Meghan made sure that the puplic remembered it, while pretending she had no idea about the tabloid reporting about the British royal family 🤔

"Harry who? Is he kind?" <simper>

Apparently not. He's a shit to his close family.

TBF, if Meghan was who Harry chose, then his family should have kept their mounts shut. It’s his life at the end of the day.

His family have said significantly less than both Harry and Meghan have in the last 7 years.

What?
That makes no sense.

I gave her a pass at the time because of possible nerves and the attention of the world's press, but have never really believed she didn't know exactly who Harry was.

There was an entire cargo cult around Prince Philip in an extremely remote place, decades ago. It is actually impossible to believe that an American didn't know much about the son of probably one of the most famous women in human history (also, Google)

*mouths not mounts!

What part?

I’m no fan of Meghan, but it’s Harry’s decision who to marry, not anyone else’s.