A genuinely nice and friendly thread about Meghan

[MonteShitshow]

Hi everyone! As suggested on another thread, I’m starting this to provide some balance to the MM / MS threads which have been perceived as bullying and not joyful.

So please feel free to join in and share something pleasant and joyful about your day or any comments about MM / MS as an antidote if the other threads have caused you upset. Please be nice!

I’ll begin by saying that writing notes by hand is a lovely thing to do, and conveys sincerity beyond any effusive email or text message. And nice handwriting is a bonus! Hand cramp is a problem of the digital age.

Also, I’ve watched two episodes of the series now, and I love the garden plants in California. Waiting for the spring to bloom here!

I agree that he hasn’t taken responsibility or apologised for his racist comments and actions. There’s is no excise for that. If he now knows better, he should have apologised.

The other members of the royals who were racist, like Philip should also have apologised, there is no excuse. I think the woman who wore the brooch did apologise. Sorry I can’t remember who it was. It’s clear that racism is present within the family.

Oh @Maitri108 Ha ha . I read your post and thought - I didn't know baby hummingbirds were called chickens. I get it now but just a dim moment 😂

I'm trying to think of I've seen one at a zoo or something like that but I've seen them in nature programmes where they're absolutely tiny.

I looked it up and it's close. They're called chicks.

Awww! Chicks!

According to a Reuters report he apologised:

The Muslim Council of Britain (MCB), an umbrella group for British Muslim organisations, said Harry's language had been unacceptable and had harmed the image of the army, which has been trying to recruit more widely from minorities.

But MCB spokesman Inayat Bunglawala said Harry had done the right thing by apologising. "It's now time to move on," he said.

And from the bbc:

I didn't know [it] was an insult," he said. "When I was little, I'd heard lots of people use that word and had never seen anyone scowl or seem upset, and I'd never considered those people [using the word] to be racists," he said.

"I was 21, I'd grown up isolated from the real world and surrounded by privileges, and I believed that word was like saying 'Yankee'. Innocuous."

Harry said his father's office released a statement on his behalf, and that although he wanted to put out his own statement, staff advised against it.
^^
"In any case, Ahmed was the person who mattered," he wrote. "I contacted him directly and asked for his forgiveness. He said he knew I wasn't a racist, that it was alright. But it wasn't alright. And his forgiveness, his natural deference, only made me feel worse."

I don’t think he was passing the buck when explaining how he grew up, I think he was explaining how he grew up in his book about his life up until 2022.

BBC article

He apologised: I’m yet to hear any other royal speak to their racism, yet Harry grew up in this family and family is where we learn first. We learn it as children from the adults around us. He didn’t absorb it from nothing. Diana very well told him off, but where did he first learn this behaviour? Kids don’t think up racism on their own. It’s not innate, it’s learned. My impression of Harry now is that he’s still learning to do better and be better.

but you refuse to believe what some staff have said when it’s exactly the same thing

So that’s okay and all forgiven?

It’s good that he apologised to the person he said it to, but in his position, I think he actually needs to say the word sorry publicly. Also, his father putting a statement out and him not being able to doesn’t apply once he got older and certainly not now that he is free of their control.

I do agree that when you grow up with racist family, it becomes the norm for you and you don’t necessarily realise when things are racist or how wrong it is when you’re younger. As you get older and learn, there is no excuse. Philip was a man who was offensive and racist and seemed to think he could say whatever he liked. I’m sure he had a big influence on Harry.

So it’s Phillip’s fault that Harry said racist comment s? Just like he had no control in wearing that Nazi uniform?

I don’t refuse to believe it. I’m not sure what to think. The amount of staff leaving and things they’ve said makes me think it may be true or there is at least some truth in it. On the other hand, I do think the timing is suspicious and there is a motive from some to show her as bad. Smear campaigns do happen. There is also the fact that I know someone who knew her, as I wrote in a pp, who said she was lovely and was well liked. That person is convinced that she would never act like that.

I wouldn’t spend my time making posts attacking the people that have made accusations about Meghan because I’m an adult who realises that isn’t acceptable and I don’t know what the truth is, whereas people do spend their time attacking Meghan when they don’t know the truth. Ultimately, none of us know, but I do find the people on this board mocking Meghan day after day too much. Even if she is a bully and a liar, the behaviour from some posters is disproportional and not normal.

You could also say the same for her “fans”.

I don’t think the poster is saying that, but what we see as children has a big influence on what we think is ok.

I’m not white, not British and one of my white British friends was brought up in a family that was racist. She is embarrassed of some of the opinions she used to have growing up. I know she isn’t racist now and I know that any opinions she had as a teen and young adult were very much shaped by her upbringing. She worked on herself and changed. It takes time to undo what you learn as a child.

A great post from you

I had thought he had apologised when he spoke about it in his book again. But you are right in that he’s not apologised for it in a public statement similar to the one his father released, but different - in that it would come directly from him

I think Charles should speak about racism too. But the royals have a habit of not addressing issues.

During his last tour of Kenya Charles spoke with f the atrocities committed on the Kenyan people during the 1950s and 60s. But he fell short of apologizing for the British governments actions. Charles in Kenya

“King Charles Describes “Abhorrent and Unjustifiable” Acts Against Kenyans During British Rule
However, it will be noted by many that his words fall short of an apology”

“Ahead of the royal arrival into Kenya today, organization Kenya Human Rights Commission released a statement and open letter calling on the King to issue an “unconditional and unequivocal public apology (as opposed to the very cautious, self-preserving and protective statements of regrets) for the brutal and inhuman treatment inflicted on Kenyan citizens during the entire colonial period (from 1895 to 1963) and thereafter, to date.” The group added, “Such an apology is a critical step in acknowledging the pain and suffering of Kenyans.”

Since when did the Muslim Council Of Britain speak on behalf of all people who have had the P* slur used against them? They don't speak for me and never will.

The Muslim council will be referring to his other recorded comment! He also used the term “ ragh*”!

Charles will never apologise as such, because that opens the door for reparations.

To be fair to Charles (and I really am not a royalist) I think he really wants to appear to be progressive on race. But he really is not. The institution doesn't get it. He is part of that institution, he knows no different. They are steeped in a racist history.

But I'm derailing. Let's talk hummingbirds!

I wouldn’t defend Meghan fans attacking and mocking everything others do on a daily basis. Any of them doing that are wrong and their behaviour isn’t normal. On the mumsnet RF board, the hate I see is aimed at Meghan and Harry. I’m sure I don’t see everything but it’s post after post mocking her and being negative with posters egging each other on.

Harry was not a child when he used the P* word. He was an adult and an officer in the army. He went to school with many boys from a multi-cultural heritage. His father was and is one of the most progressive members of the RF. His mother apparently tried to teach him to see people from other cultures and walks of life as human beings. Exactly how much of his upbringing can be attributed to Prince Philip? He told his friends that Chelsy Davy was African but not "black or anything". He rent on Colbert in 2023 expressing relief that his daughter hadn't inherited her mother's dark hair/eyes/skin, that his ginger genes had prevailed. Harry has not changed at all, he just thinks he can get away with it by blaming everyone around him for his own choices and behaviour.

His mother apparently tried to teach him to see people from other cultures and walks of life as human beings

I think not. I am trying hard to not derail but there is footage out there of his mother talking of an Ambassador looking like an ape.

Let's not rewrite history. It's all wrong. Harry was wrong. But it's the family he was brought up in.

There's never been a civilisation on the face of the earth that isn't steeped in racist history. Perhaps those wanting reparations should look at all the other countries that carried on with slavery long after it was abolished by the British Empire. Let's start with Meghan's homeland, Nigeria.

Well I'm only going off the sainthood bestowed on Diana by her youngest son and his wife. Take it up with them if he's been lying about her goodness. Perhaps they should stop worshipping her if she was a racist.

Great post 👏 @FromTheOfficeOfJammyTodger

I am talking about the UK. Not NIgeria. Yes, of course, there were many wrongdoings elsewhere, but let's keep on the subject. UK.

We should concentrate on our country.