The markel family interview

[IamSuperTired]

Anyone know how/where I can watch it? :) I think it's on today ....

@Rockybooboo please be real, there is evidently almost nothing about the childhood of A & L that is not weird.

I don’t think it is appropriate to minimise a personal attack on a poster just because you didn’t t see it

What? How the hell are we meant to comment on something we haven’t seen?!?

Give examples. I mean i know people who grew up in one bed flats and people who grew up in huge houses, people who's parents were together and loved each oter and parents who barely tolerated each other, people who's parents belonged a religion and others who's parents who were athiests, large families and single children etc etc..

What is specically weird about these kidsa

The day I thought would never come is here!

I agree with the last posts by @polkadotdalmation @MamoruHisaishi and @Sudeko

Thomas Markle should indeed focus on the 5 grandchildren he has not seen, and the Markle sibs should focus on their estranged kids.

The fact that the hated Meghan is at the centre of this has blinded many to seeing this for what it is. It is a step-family drama of the kind we read about on Mumsnet all the time.

Samantha and Tom Jnr clearly resented their younger sister because she was raised with something they did not have, not just money, but a loving father and mother. They both ran away from their mother Rosalyn to live with Thomas, after he had left them in Chicago. To this day, they are estranged from their mother. In her book, Samantha labels her "promiscuous".

It cannot have been easy for them to see their father loved up with a new child, a new wife, in better circumstances than he had with Rosalyn. And when that marriage broke up, to see Meghan grow up, not in an acrimonious divorce like they did, but in a fairly harmonious one, switching homes, still loved by both her mother and father. Meghan then became the first member of the family to get a university education.

Meanwhile, they went on to have their own dysfunctional relationships, in low paid jobs, with their own children not talking to them, while Meghan is happily married with a husband who adores her and their two children.

It can't be easy being Samantha and TJ.

If they were not so terribly bitter, I would even feel for them.

The poster was mistaken nonetheless. Those comments were unkind absolutely (is that what was deleted?) but subsequent comments were not.

Their anger is directed at the wrong person

One grandfather entertains people who claim that their mother faked her pregancies with them or that they don't exist. Would you really want your children around someone like that? Really?

They can't direct their anger where it belongs, at TS, because he is in touch with the person they do blame. He is in effect, to use Mumsnet lingo, their flying monkey. And I am sure he has his own guilt about them.

The truth is that Thomas Markle isn’t interested in his other grandchildren as they are not British Royalty

My DH has kept our children away from his father, stepmum and family for their own safety and well-being and now our children are grown adults neither of them blame or are angry at him for making these decisions. He did this as their parent to protect them from people who harmed him as he did not want to keep repeating abusive cycles with his children. I really don’t get why anyone thinks Meghan should have her children anywhere near the Markels. No responsible parent would.

In fact, if the Harry and Meghan had not left the UK, their kids would have been compared unfavourably with the Wales kids, and would have been the next generation of fodder for the tabloid press.

You already see this with the Wales children - Charlotte and Louis already are being described here on MN and in the media according to a narrative - Charlotte being the sensible dutiful one who sorts out her brothers and Louis being described as cheeky and naughty. These are very much children who are still growing into themselves and we already have set roles out for them.

But comments were made by posters who had not seen it 🤷‍♀️

I think it is more complex than that. As I said on the other thread, he ditched the gruesome twosome and genuinely doted exclusively on Meghan from the moment she was born and indulged her obsessively and unhealthily. His 'loss' of a daughter gives off very similar vibes to the loss of a prized work of art that was stolen or a rare breed of cat which escaped his clutches. He was deeply in awe of her in an unhealthy way and is wounded and confused. I wouldn't really consider it a healthy father-daughter dynamic. He probably would favour her children exclusively over the other grandchildren whether or not they were royal.

The siblings all hate each other, as is obvious from their words and actions. They are there to deepen the rift and have daddy back to themselves (finally!) rather than help him rebuild bridges. TMs body language from when he embraced them upon arriving in Florida was very stifled and hesitant. They are all colluding in generating content for payment with no realistic end goal in sight. The reasons which they give for doing it are not credible in the slightest.

I am hopeful that William and Kate will break this cycle of their children. In fact, Harry has done the RF a favour by writing about the painful dynamics of the heir spare thing. It is possible to raise children lovingly, and fairly, even while knowing that one is destined for a different fate from the other two.

It helps that the older generation of directly influential royals who were raised with Heir and Spare dynamic is not involved in the upbringing of the Wales kids in the way they were with W and K.

William, Kate and the Middletons will see that similar dynamics are avoided. And that's a really good thing.

What the press do however is another thing all together.

So agree with this. Three chat show or RRs spent a few minutes a couple of weeks ago talking about Louis. The conversation ranged from calling him the cheeky one, the sparky one, the funny one and so on
He's labelled already and betcha that will stick for a very long time

I agree with this post entirely, who would have thought 😀

I have posted that Meghan made a mistake in responding to their spite with some of her own. Best to ignore Sammantha and Thomas

But Meghan spoke so lovingly about her dad, I felt sad their relationship broke down, but then was the father described by her in her blog a fantasy one or the real one.

This is very well observed.

I want to be charitable and say that like many men who made mistakes with their first family, he wanted to make it right for his next, but yes, you are absolutely spot on to say there is a "prized possession" quality to how he sees Meghan. She was clearly, as a child, not only cute and intelligent, but also interested in his own field, which gave them much to bond over, and must have made him see her as more of an extension of himself than his other kids.

This is the dynamic so many of us are so uncomfortable with, the possessive quality that sees her as "owing him", an entitlement that is controlling and emotionally manipulative.

I very much agree with ^^ this.

This is the dynamic so many of us are so uncomfortable with, the possessive quality that sees her as "owing him", an entitlement that is controlling and emotionally manipulative.

Yes, this is discussed in AIBU & relationship boards all the time and almost all responses will observe what you have in this family.

At the end of the day, I want to be there for my children through their whole lives but especially when times are hard. I don’t care what they say to other people about me 🤷🏽‍♀️ my absolute priority from the moment I had them was their well-being and my main role is to support and help them now they’re adults. If either of them ever became well known I would never sell a story or make public comments about them, no matter what. I don’t get other parents defending him at all. I would never make my child’s already difficult scary life full of death threats harder. Not for all the money in Murdochs bank account.

A parents love is meant to be unconditional.

@Howsimplywonderful

How simply wonderful to agree at last. I agree with you too.

I believe that Meghan really loved her father, and this is why she has been unable to get over what he did. It's often said here that we revaluate how we were parented once we become parents ourselves. She said in the Oprah interview that she can't imagine hurting Archie the way her father hurt her. That I think is the crux of it. He prioritised tabloid money over her feelings, and that is a hard one to live with.

I feel that without Samantha and TJ, there might be some healing, but for as long as those two are arranging his press etc, she will never be free of them, so it means cutting him off. One thing she should do though is to offer him financial assistance to support his medical needs, even while maintaining a distance.

@MrsMaxDeWinter yes in the Netflix series she said once she knew he wasn’t the one answering her, they had to stop engaging. They were trying very hard before that. I think her father has been unwell and lost the life he once had as often happens with illness. My father became unwell due to alcohol and he was very unpleasant in those years so I had to go NC for awhile, it was very very upsetting and not an easy thing to do. He’s much better in recent years and we’re close again so who knows what the future holds for this family. I just wish they had privacy from the press to try and heal, either together or apart.

But you are using your more ‘normal’ family standards and parental responsibilities and trying to apply them to a completely dysfunctional family. Those standards don’t/can’t be applied, they are not a family unit they are all working independently whilst presenting as a family, they have no boundaries or sense of duty or responsibility to each other.

@MrsMaxDeWinter

I think her father loved her a lot, but he must also wrestle the guilt of his favouritism which his other kids probably play on ‘if only you had done this for me….’

My mum is a little younger than Thomas Markle. She says the hardest thing for her about getting old is getting fearful about doing things you would have done before without a second thought, I think he must have been terrified at the thought of the wedding. My mum was panicked about having the right travel insurance etc for holidays

I think if Thomas Markle didn’t have a heart attack, he had severe panic attacks at the thought of the wedding and Meghan/Harry in hindsight should have met him but water under the bridge now.

I saw an interview where he talked about being uncomfortable about walking Meghan down the aisle at her first wedding, which was on a beach, he seemed very self-copious about his appearance.

And yes, I agree that they should have flown him out much earlier, to meet everyone, make him comfortable etc.

Hindsight, and all that.