Just finished 'Spare'...

[HerReputationMadeItDifficultToProceed]

… and I encourage anyone who’s even vaguely interested in this story to give it a read. Especially if what’s been leaked has made you at all angry, because I think in context everything makes a lot of sense.

I wasn’t a Harry and Meghan hater before reading this, but I wasn’t a fan girl either. Like many Brits, I find a lot of Americans- especially West Coast Americans- quite irritating and Meghan firmly falls into that camp for me. I’m sure she’s nice enough, but she’s very American and very perky and much like Wednesday Addams, I don’t do perky. However, I suspect that her intentions and generally good and that like most of us she’s got good and bad qualities. She’s clearly ambitious and I think that she probably initially dated Harry based on that ambition and on getting a platform, although I think that she genuinely loves him now.

The ghost writer has done a great job at capturing Harry’s personality I think; he comes across as introspective and thoughtful but funny and bright.

I think that Harry has a good soul; I think that he’s kind and has had a hard time of it growing up. I also think he’s a bit clueless and naive and has been in a bubble, but I think he acknowledges that and wants to understand and change. Undoubtedly losing his mother at the age he was had more of an outward impact on him than it had on William. He’s also been a victim of his dad’s wishywashy parenting. It sounds like- and looks like to me from my vantage point as a normal citizen who knows bugger all except what I’ve seen in the media- that Charles has been there for his kids to an extent, but not in a hands on or especially useful way. It also seems clear that Charles has always put Camilla first. From almost the moment Diana died it seems that he wanted, above everything else, to rehabilitate Camilla’s image so that they could marry. I think that he put that above being a father and the way Harry writes about their relationship makes that clear too.

I also think that it’s suited the palace to portray Harry as dimwitted and feckless to show William in a better light and that Harry has every right to be angry about that and not want to play that game anymore (and to call it out now). Especially as it’s obvious that the palace haven’t kept up their side of the bargain and protected Harry from the media in return.

I also think that the media have treated H and M poorly and it’s clearly the case that the palace has used them and news stories about them to divert from other newsworthy problems… certainly Prince Andrew, perhaps William’s affair/s. Is Harry overly jumpy about the media and the paparazzi in particular? Yes, of course. Who wouldn’t be with his background. But they’ve also obviously been hounded and harassed.

I do think that Harry is on a journey that he isn’t at the end of yet, but I think that he realises that too. I think that he was always going to leave the royal family and that Meghan didn’t cause what’s happened, she was just the catalyst for it. I think that he’s been scapegoated and an afterthought within his nuclear family and I don’t blame him for being angry. I think that he means well and is essentially good. And I don’t think that anyone who’s read the whole book would be able to disagree.

More than anything I think it’s clear that the British Royal Family is no longer fit for purpose; the way they live, bring up their children, pay their members for work and demand unrealistic levels of protocol and formality is no longer working in the 21st century. These people need purpose and lives beyond the crown and those on the edges of the heir shouldn’t have to live their lives in service of the their. Realistically H and M could have worked as royals and had private interests, the RF chose not to bend to help them live fulfilling lives because of its own, outdated reasons.

So for the ‘Meghan made Kate cry’ episode that the press say came from two independent sources, where is the evidence that this was untrue? There were at least a dozen people at that bridesmaids fitting and being made to cry doesn’t reflect well on Kate, however understandable it might have been given the stresses both women were under at that point.

If you listen to Dan Wootton then this is probably the right time to exit the conversation. That man is a lying bully.

Quite. While Tom Bradby is a wellknown sycophant who has chosen sides and Camilla Tominey didn’t even mention her sources. Whoever chose those four clips isn’t the sharpest tool in the bc.

I have yet to see a misquote.

Personally I don’t understand why they insisted on going to see Dodi’s new apartment when it was dark, late and the hotel had lots of French paps there. Why not go out the next day with a better plan and a sober driver. The unnecessary urgency and neglect of safety just to see his new property was a potential accident waiting to happen (evidently) and so, so preventable.

Private conversations with a family member - the content of which popped up in the papers.

I’m so sick of this bridesmaid dress stuff. Most likely everyone was fraught but this whole Bridesmaidgate has become bigger than bloody Watergate.

I’m still getting the ick by hearing cream, mummy’s lips and todger in the same sentence. 🤣

Private conversations with a family member - the content of which popped up in the papers.

Which conversations with which family member? I have heard about Camilla leaking the first meeting with William, but someone else admitted that and resigned. Are there other specific examples of private conversations appearing in the papers? I thought one of the criticisms of Harry is that it's all a bit vague.

Yes many examples in the documentary and book.

Could you share some of the examples @Inkanta?

It's all very vague in the book.

The only one there is detail on is that Harry says he offered to give up his titles in the written statement he gave to Charles and the aides and that that appeared in the papers and he hadn't said it to anyone else.

But... giving up the titles is something there was immediate speculation about when Megxit was first announced (by H&M on Insta). Plus all the stuff around them having trademarked SussexRoyal in the USA.

I'd have to check back what the wording was in the article.

Hoooops - I'd recommend watching the documentary and reading the book. The dynamics are fascinating and it becomes very clear how Harry felt betrayed even before Meghan came along, and very protective when Meghan got strung.

So you can’t give an example from the book?

Thank you for the recommendation - please could you (or anyone) also share the examples?

Why don't you read//watch it for yourself instead of having it spoon fed to you?! .
It's not that people can't provide examples - it's just pretty pointless if you haven't read yourselves, that's the whole point - there's far too many people unwilling to think for themselves!

Same, and this

This is also a good example of why the royal family can’t respond. The initial incident was pretty minor but by complaining about the press and accusations of leaking you turn a microscope on the whole incident. The state of the bridesmaids dresses, unnoticed at the time, is examined. Other sources come out of the woodwork with other stories (time has past so they don’t have the same loyalty anymore, or they feel they need to defend themselves). Your recollection may be dodgy or when what you knew was a second hand report from someone who was under huge pressure at the time, cold light of day may not show you in the best light. And just by bringing up the incident you make yourself look petty.

Thanks for the review. I haven't Read the book and not sure if I want to yet but I do think that this has been a long time coming way before MM. I feel uncomfortable that he has done what he would expect many not to do and there are never winners when dirty laundry is aired. The genuine worry is that PH is a huge security risk so I'm wondering if it's even viable that he attends the coronation even if everyone wanted him to come.

You don't have to believe everything Harry says in the book without question. You can apply some critical thinking. Nor do you have to like him when you read it. But if you want to know what he said and how he said it, well, why rely on others when you could see for yourself?

It's already on various used book sellers if you really don't want to give him money.

The RF have been working hard to portray Harry as crazy or having a mental breakdown all along. Palace sources talking about Charles and William supposedly being concerned about his mental health and being kidnapped by therapists. The suggestion they're taking the high road and not retaliating is ridiculous. In his tv appearances Harry seemed relaxed, collected and articulate. Whatever his reasons for doing this, they are not because he's in the throes of a mental breakdown.

That’s your opinion and like they say like ars*eholes everyone has one but I’m afraid I disagree, he comes across as a spoilt bitter brat and as someone else said telling the world other peoples business least alone his family “the royal family” without their permission is quite frankly unforgivable and a massive invasion of privacy which is the very thing he himself has been shouting about for years

It’s all very “Hi Pot it’s me Kettle I’m black”

Aside from clever ghost writing, I don't think Harry would have a lot of direct insights to share about Diana even though she was his mother. He was basically very young when she died, not exactly an inquisitive or deep thinking person and brought up by a series of staff in a joined custody situation. There would be friends of Diana who could tell the public more about what she was actually like. He would be quite far down the list.

I’m indifferent to the Royal family and have always thought the younger royals seemed more in touch with the real world than the older generation. My take on all of this is that I don’t know how people can believe a story where there’s only one side given. We all know that in our own family dynamics, if we were to tell a story about where we felt wronged, it’s extremely unlikely that we would paint ourselves in a bad light or offer a completely honest and balanced view of exactly what happened. There’s the truth and then there’s the involved peoples version of events. None of us know these individuals personally and it’s impossible to gauge facts from someone’s perception of an event/events.

As they have not replied I don’t think so.

In his tv appearances Harry seemed relaxed, collected and articulate

I thought he seemed quite agitated and angry in the Tom Bradby interview.