Just finished 'Spare'...

[HerReputationMadeItDifficultToProceed]

… and I encourage anyone who’s even vaguely interested in this story to give it a read. Especially if what’s been leaked has made you at all angry, because I think in context everything makes a lot of sense.

I wasn’t a Harry and Meghan hater before reading this, but I wasn’t a fan girl either. Like many Brits, I find a lot of Americans- especially West Coast Americans- quite irritating and Meghan firmly falls into that camp for me. I’m sure she’s nice enough, but she’s very American and very perky and much like Wednesday Addams, I don’t do perky. However, I suspect that her intentions and generally good and that like most of us she’s got good and bad qualities. She’s clearly ambitious and I think that she probably initially dated Harry based on that ambition and on getting a platform, although I think that she genuinely loves him now.

The ghost writer has done a great job at capturing Harry’s personality I think; he comes across as introspective and thoughtful but funny and bright.

I think that Harry has a good soul; I think that he’s kind and has had a hard time of it growing up. I also think he’s a bit clueless and naive and has been in a bubble, but I think he acknowledges that and wants to understand and change. Undoubtedly losing his mother at the age he was had more of an outward impact on him than it had on William. He’s also been a victim of his dad’s wishywashy parenting. It sounds like- and looks like to me from my vantage point as a normal citizen who knows bugger all except what I’ve seen in the media- that Charles has been there for his kids to an extent, but not in a hands on or especially useful way. It also seems clear that Charles has always put Camilla first. From almost the moment Diana died it seems that he wanted, above everything else, to rehabilitate Camilla’s image so that they could marry. I think that he put that above being a father and the way Harry writes about their relationship makes that clear too.

I also think that it’s suited the palace to portray Harry as dimwitted and feckless to show William in a better light and that Harry has every right to be angry about that and not want to play that game anymore (and to call it out now). Especially as it’s obvious that the palace haven’t kept up their side of the bargain and protected Harry from the media in return.

I also think that the media have treated H and M poorly and it’s clearly the case that the palace has used them and news stories about them to divert from other newsworthy problems… certainly Prince Andrew, perhaps William’s affair/s. Is Harry overly jumpy about the media and the paparazzi in particular? Yes, of course. Who wouldn’t be with his background. But they’ve also obviously been hounded and harassed.

I do think that Harry is on a journey that he isn’t at the end of yet, but I think that he realises that too. I think that he was always going to leave the royal family and that Meghan didn’t cause what’s happened, she was just the catalyst for it. I think that he’s been scapegoated and an afterthought within his nuclear family and I don’t blame him for being angry. I think that he means well and is essentially good. And I don’t think that anyone who’s read the whole book would be able to disagree.

More than anything I think it’s clear that the British Royal Family is no longer fit for purpose; the way they live, bring up their children, pay their members for work and demand unrealistic levels of protocol and formality is no longer working in the 21st century. These people need purpose and lives beyond the crown and those on the edges of the heir shouldn’t have to live their lives in service of the their. Realistically H and M could have worked as royals and had private interests, the RF chose not to bend to help them live fulfilling lives because of its own, outdated reasons.

My copy hasn’t arrived yet, but I can’t wait to read it.
I think it’s hilarious how the sun/Mail/mirror spins stories and their readers lap it up and are livid without bothering to look at context. And obviously what those papers count on. Embarrassingly predictable.

The RF have and do retaliate. If you read my post upthread I explained how the palace use the media. They don’t outright “complain” or “explain” they simply feed leaks to their media contacts.

They’re not doing that right now because a. It would be very obvious as H has called them out on that specific behaviour b. I think even they can see that alll the past briefing has had unexpected and damaging consequences, c. It’s better PR for them to not respond at all.

Sometimes I wonder if people screaming, "but look at the context" "take it in context", actually know what it means. As someone else said on one of these threads "context is being required to do some heavy lifting"

And William?

Who really does 'have to get on with it'

Diana & Dodi...
Thing is, how many pictures are there of Diana & Hasnat Khan?
HK was her steady boyfd for what... 2+ years?
Find me a single picture of them together.
HK figured out how to date the most beautiful & photographed woman in the world & yet not be seen/known/pursued by the press.
HK even met the young princes.

Just thinking that Diana also knew how to keep her relationship out of Press if it suited her.

I'm with whoever wished Harry peace. He's never going to find it by talking publicly about his family, though.

I disagree that this book is trashing anyone except for Murdoch and his cronies. He isn’t trashing family members, throwing them under the bus, or even being disrespectful. He states his feelings on matters but constantly reiterates how much he loves them and how much he wants their care.
Even Camilla, he can’t be clearer, he wants his dad to be happy. What he struggles with, and quite rightly, is lies being told about him and his wife, to keep the rest of them in favour. He cited letters and examples in his book that were leaked, and it wasn’t just happening to him, but also Will & Kate. He realises and it’s heartbreaking for him, that stories were never going to be corrected because they need to keep the press on side to keep the family going. They are all fucked if the tabloids start to dislike them.

The RF have and do retaliate. If you read my post upthread I explained how the palace use the media. They don’t outright “complain” or “explain” they simply feed leaks to their media contacts.
This, as he has explained

And not one of her actual friends agreed with the publicist.

@BadgerB The disputes were instigated by her father, get your facts right. You are outright blatant lying at this point.

She is in contact with her mother's family. Another thing you've got wrong.

Also, there are many people in the Stately Homes threads and on AIBU who are NC with both sides of a family. The entire family. It's quite common. You are victim-blaming, making up lies, and have no clue what you are talking about.

They are all fucked if the tabloids start to dislike them.

Indeed. And all this furore has achieved is exponentially increase support for them. It’s put back the republican cause by decades.

I also found it fascinating to read about how King Charles controlled Will & Harry’s money. They weren’t sponging as the tabloids liked to say, they had no ability to earn for themselves, it wasn’t an option, and when there was that nickname slung about ‘Work-shy Will’ it was actually Charles who controlled how many engagements they did.

Interesting you think that, it’s done the opposite for me. I couldn’t dislike the royal family more right now

It’s not me thinking it. Read the literally thousands of posts here. You’re a member of a tiny minority, to the point whereby I could actually name your fellow posters.

Also, there are many people in the Stately Homes threads and on AIBU who are NC with both sides of a family. The entire family. It's quite common. You are victim-blaming, making up lies, and have no clue what you are talking about. Those threads are usually a load of nonsense though. I take them with a pinch of salt.

And half of them are the same person!

Yes their story is their story. The 6 part documentary went into great detail and they backed up their up grievance with evidence. Evidence that is hard to gaslight.

Do you admit to believing everything you read in the press but nothing Harry says?

This 👏

Do we know who leaked of the section about the altercation at Nottingham cottage to the Guardian several days before publication? Obviously it wasn't the RF. The passage was carefully chosen to be the most explosive and detrimental to William. It was only because the spanish copies became accidentally available (the next day I think) that there was any coverage of the any other content.
It would appear that there was a deliberate attempt to pre-empt the launch by dropping this one massive spoiler and thereby influence opinions in Harry's favour before the book was even available?
Have I missed an explanation of this?

Yep

That's why neither side will try to courts

Both are leaking. And the last to laugh is neither side but the media.

What evidence?

Evidence? What objective evidence did they present? It is all hearsay.

If anyone wants a 'not pushed by Harry and Meghan' account of the relationship between the royals and the press, have a watch of this.

The RF have and do retaliate. If you read my post upthread I explained how the palace use the media. They don’t outright “complain” or “explain” they simply feed leaks to their media contacts

^^ This

And here are some well iknown faces (Dan Wootton, Camilla Tominey etc) saying exactly this.
twitter.com/claireXanda/status/1609898468621058048?t=ZhLCjSfzAsXZH2tQ4-3Z7g&s=19

@Blossomtoes thats fair, although I don’t know how representative mumsnet is of the whole population, I often wonder how many posters are just on here to be controversial.