Harry needs to go NC

[Twatalert]

Harry needs to go NC with his family and grieve for the kind of family he never had.

It is clear they are completely dysfunctional. I believe everything he says. He has gained awareness of the abuse going on, but now sees abuse everywhere. It is typical for abuse survivors. Once you have seen it you see it everywhere and it is hard to distinguish which part is the abuse and which part is human.

He needs to spend time with himself, continue to process and come to terms with everything rather than selling it.

In time he might understand that he cannot change them and he cannot convince them to change. They'll either wake up or they won't. He can only decice how he wants to deal with what they give him. He has not yet understood he needs to let go of them, which is the reality of many that have been abused.

William was the golden child and Harry the scapegoat. Trouble is he finds issue with 'normal' things (bigger and smaller bedroom's..) rather than pinpointing the systematic abuse he has suffered.

He's trying to convince the world he was treated unfairly. A sign that he is not ready to let go and wants approval from millions. He is in pain.

Instead of books and interviews, he should write a diary (and not publish it).

Can the rest of us have the coordinates for Utopia?

This. So much this. Probably all of us have had problematic things happen to us as children, without the cushion of enormous wealth and privilege. Can someone please get PH to shut the fuck up about how hard he had it and still does?

But she is deluded,no?

@Twatalert just ignore all the silliness about your user name, it's petty.

I think he absolutely has the right to give his side of the story, just because he was born into the royal family, does not mean he has to put up and shut up, money and power doesn't buy silence.

He has told his truth, I find it absolutely shocking that people are saying he should just sit back and have lies told about him.
And people who say because he took public money for his job role, they have every right to lie about him, it's ridiculous.

I think some people believe everything the press feed them, wether that be politics, celebs or the royal family. The press should not be able to treat people like they do, but you have the public defending that behaviour and it's shocking they are trying to continue to promote that.

I believe a lot of what he says, it is and has been absolutely clear they are dysfunctional even before all this and not a lot of what he says has shocked me.
I haven't heard him say anything that bad about his family.
They didn't support him when the press started lying about him and his Mrs, that's out there to see, you can't argue that.

He has gone public as everything said about him was public.
He's earth a few quid out of it, would people think it ok for him to defend himself publicly providing he earth nothing off it ????

Clearly half these people can't. Hence their online hysteria about a couple of people they have never met and don't even know they exist

Wealth and priviledge don't lessen the severety of mental illness. Perhaps without all the wealth and privildge H would have needed to get a proper job and perhaps he would know what he's actually good at and likes doing so he didn't have to do interviews and books to make money.

Actually, I am sure he doesn't feel as well off. His standard of living is too high and he likely feels the same pressures as the rest of us, albeit in a completely different dimension. He needs a steady stream of lots of money for the rest of his life w/o a real job or he might lose it all. Us commoners think 'why doesn't he downsize, he could life so well and quietly somewhere', but he probably would not know how.

@Thinkbiglittleone

“He has told his truth, I find it absolutely shocking that people are saying he should just sit back and have lies told about him.”

His truth ? Hmm . There is evidence that he ( and his wife) have a tenuous relationship with the truth .

I mean this kindly OP, and I really do, but it does seem as if you're projecting. You've mentioned that you've survived abuse yourself and I think this has coloured the lens you're looking through.

There's no evidence of any abuse anywhere. And as it stands, there's not even any specific allegations about the "leaks". Given how very specific Harry has been with the rest of his complaints, it's rather odd that he's just wafted over that with vague hints?

Losing his mother so young was dreadful. And maybe Charles wasn't everything that he had hoped as a father, especially compared to his affectionate, tactile mother. But there are plenty of photos which show Harry and Charles off guard, interacting with each other with love and affection too. I don't really buy this "cold fish" story when there's evidence to the contrary. Maybe he wasn't everything that Harry would have ideally wanted - but lots of us can say that about our parents. It doesn't equal abuse. Harry had a difficult childhood but I can't agree that there's any signs of abuse. And actually, I'm pretty sure he'd have used that word if he thought for a second that it might be even half-true!

I think he's the younger, spoilt child who's always been able to do what he wanted without the constraints that were on William. Jealousy, petulance and spite have guided his decisions, caused him to sell private stories and tell half-truths, and it's not been a wise move.

I hope he goes on to retreat with his family and enjoy the wonderful home he now has. He can lead a private life, work in a capacity to bring about good with campaigns he believes in, there's no need for any of this.

He has told his truth

HIS truth; which isn't necessarily THE truth. Let's face it, both of the Sussexes seem to have what might kindly called a flexible relationship with what's true and what isn't.

And it's pretty funny that you say I think some people believe everything the press feed them while at the same time saying I believe a lot of what he says. Why is what he says any more worthy of belief than what the press says?

Hence their online hysteria

Dear me, that's a rather sexist term to be using on a site largely frequented by women. And yet, despite your distaste, here you are.

I'm confident I am not projecting. I can just see where he might be coming from. I agree we don't know enough and never will to completely make up our minds. It is incredibly difficult to uncover dysfunction and abuse and Harry hasn't really managed to do that and I am not surprised at all.

I think he will fail and never be able to convince the public, but even that won't mean it hasn't happened. I'd rather open my mind to the fact that there might be abuse than disbelieving a victim until they present me with enough evidence. It is important to try and see both sides at all times. In the end, any abuser was likely abused before, so where does it start and where does it end?

You believe everything he says even though he's lied and changed his story over and over again ? Okay lol 😆

Probably all of us have had problematic things happen to us as children, without the cushion of enormous wealth and privilege.Can someone please get PH to shut the fuck up about how hard he had it and still does?

But this is so silly.
Money does not stop your little world collapsing when your mum dies.
Money is no good if you are not allowed to access help because "we just get on with it"
Dealing with all that under such a microscope and everything being printed in the paper, wealth doesn't take that away.

Someone could have offered me a million pound to walk behind my mums coffin on the day we bury her, on nation Tv, smiling and shaking people hand and it then be printed all over the papers, I would have told them to shove it.
Money and wealth does not make these sort of complex issues disappear.
He has had a privileged life in many many ways, but it has also been a terrible curse.

I find it absolutely shocking that people are saying he should just sit back and have lies told about him.

But what has he gained by attempting to refute the stories in the press? Yet more negative comments, jokes etc. And I'm sure most of us have at least some people who definitely believe lives about us. And most of us just quietly cut the liars (and those who believe them) from our lives. It is almost never worth trying to get someone who thinks badly of you to change their mind.

Would he have been okay with the abuse his family gave him and been okay with his ‘dysfunctional family’ (who’s isn’t?) if they had all liked Meghan, and if she had had a bigger house after marriage - or if he was going to be king. He seems to have seen through it all very recently after millions of pounds and a lot of privileges.

and I’ve grown up with brothers and sisters one who told me pretend we don’t know each other in school because she was the older cool kid and I was all over the place and now she loves me up it’s what teenagers do. If you look at everything with the lens of trauma it’s all sooo abusive and sooo traumatic. He needs to meet real people. People who’ve lost their mums over lockdown and not been able to see them or properly blame the hospital or get answers or put their dog down or can’t afford to move away from their abusive partners

Ungrateful comes to mind. He complains like someone who is incredibly jealous and out of touch and ungrateful. And I agree with William. Rude. Abrasive. Difficult. They need someone to properly tell them to just go NC on the media for a while. Rehabilitating their image seems to be a full time job - if it made camilla dangerous , he thought, it’s making them dangerously foolish.

Money is no good if you are not allowed to access help because "we just get on with it"

I thought he'd had therapy for his mother's death? and FTR, my father died in the 60s when I was 13 - when you really were expected to just get on with it. And I didn't go to his funeral either - I'd have given a lot to be able to do that, whatever I was expected to do.

@BethJ62

His truth ? Hmm
What ???it is his truth ? Why can't he answer back for himself?

There is evidence that he ( and his wife) have a tenuous relationship with the truth

Which parts that he had directly said are you questioning ? That you have heard directly from his lips, not from the press.

Yes and his family have also been well know to lie (cover things up)

You went too far in your thread title adding the ‘N’ and the ‘C’.

@MrsDanversGlidesAgain

Why is what he says any more worthy of belief than what the press says?

And there we have it. Need I say more.

I totally agree OP. I have seen people from toxic dysfunctional families behaving in the same way.

If they didn’t complain about it when they were happy why complain about it when they are sad. Can’t be that abusive then

Also, HE let his wife down. And he wants to blame his family. No mate, that’s your duty as husband. And you advocated for mental health so arent you supposed to know she’s struggling ?

And there we have it. Need I say more

Well, yes, you do. You might want to clarify whether you agree or disagree, for a start.

Interesting theory. I can't say I agree with it all, but I agree 100% with this:

He needs to spend time with himself, continue to process and come to terms with everything rather than selling it.

He’s a complete muppet. I’d rather he went one stage further and go NC with the whole world.

OK, fair enough - if you're comfortable that you're not projecting, then OK.

The only counter point I would make to you is that by believing Harry, you're potentially accusing certain people of being abusive - with zero evidence. Would you say that's an acceptable thing to do? And in fact, there's evidence to the contrary as Harry has been shown to have a loose attachment to facts and the truth.

Of course it's important to listen to what people say, and vital to give serious consideration to the fact that they might be telling the truth. But Harry has made no allegations of abuse, just a bunch of spurious, childish grievances.

People loved Harry. If there was anyone they would have forgiven for anything, it was him. The fact he has fallen so far says a lot about how poor his behaviour has been, and how unbelievable his claims are.

Where's your pity for William, and for Charles? For having their privacy invaded so ruthlessly? For having intensely private moments sold as cannon fodder for the world?

if anything, Harry is beginning to look as if he's abusing his family, not the other way around.

We should take victims seriously, but we still need to employ critical thinking skills to be alert for signs that someone might not be telling the truth. And unfortunately, there's plenty of those with Harry.