Am shocked Meghan said this…

[Ndd135632]

She said: 'Even when Will and Kate came over and I was meeting her for the first time I remember I was in ripped jeans, I was bare foot, like I was a hugger, I have always been a hugger I didn't realise that is really jarring for a lot of Brits.'

'I started to understand that the formality on the outside carried through on the inside, that there is a forward facing way of being and then you close the door and thing OK we can relax now, but that formality carries over on both sides and that was surprising to me.'

What an utterly horrible thing to say about your sister and brother-in-law. I am done with her now. People are DIFFERENT Meghan. We are not all like you you you you.

I wouldn't want someone I was meeting for the first time to try and hug me either. How about respecting personal space and not touching someone without their consent? 'I'm a hugger' - piss off.

She's 25pc black given Pa was Dutch and Ma was half white IMHO. I like what I've heard but have a few reservations

1. Who was taking the intimate photos from 20 feet away in Botswana? Can you set that up yourself with a remote camera? Seems an odd thing to do when you're very much in love. Or is this a thing?
2. Why did Harry not tell her she would meeting the Queen until just before? or what the policy was meeting his brother and SIL? I must admit it does sound in the latter case hugely formal. But Harry might have told her.
3. She only felt "black" when she came to the UK? She must have been very sheltered by her parents and upbringing. As an activist she must have been aware of the lynchings and killings in the US, the fact in some areas black votes were either not allowed or discounted, burning of black churches and people, the horrific lash back against school busing, black casting for plays, Black Lives Matter. The UK is pretty awful but .....
4. They cannot say there was a racist person or people in the Royal Family without naming them however many there are and what they did. Princess Pushy wearing a blackamoor brooch is beyond ridiculous, Susan Hussey (Harry's godmother) cross questioning a black woman at a palace fundraiser is painfully ludicrous. Yet she liked Prince Philip who made racist comments. Name the ones that offended you.

Don't the RF tell us they are normal people all the time?

The whole thing is a storm about absolutely nothing. It's so weird why people get so riled up

I find it more or less impossible to believe Megan is or was that naive, or that Harry would not have warned her. It seems self-evident to me that neither of them liked the stuffy formality of the Royal Family from the start and both actively chose to challenge that, initially just on the inside, then when facing outward to the public, too. Faux innocence is irritating. Nobody would be stupid enough to marry into the Royal Family without doing a bit of research first.

I do think the Royal Family are better than ‘commoners’.

They are who they are purely by an accident of birth, just like the rest of us. That does nor make them "better" at all.

I get what you mean @RLScott though

I'm not really having a go at you, we're just starting to examine race in the UK, whereas in America they've been having that debate for over a century. Its much more 'out there' in America, over here we barely think we have a problem. (when we do).

So she was wrong about social norms and customs.

That's all wrong. Not horrid.

It’s sad but I think that’s the unfortunate crux of a lot of these types of discussion. Many people honestly do buy the crazy propaganda that the royals are somehow ‘better’ than anyone else. I disagree massively, I think they’re just a sort of historical Kardashians. But I guess I can see how, if you subscribed to that way of thinking, you’d feel Meghan had insulted you by not playing along with the fiction that they are somehow divinely better or worthier.

So... what about being a 'hugger' who respects people's personal space and only hugs those who reach out to be hugged also?
Should they piss off too?

What about the other thread in which Lady SH was demeaning the visitor by moving her hair - are you allowed to touch others if you are from one race but not allowed if you are from another? The comments here and on the Kanye thread suggest this kind of thinking among contributors.

@bakalava no and where have I said that?
No one should be touching anyone without knowing they are ok with it , hair I find even weirder for people to touch but thats just me

What a clever comment. Absolutely.

No one can be their natural selves within the RF. They are always playing a role. A superiority based on centuries of being better than the plebs. I am sure within private quarters, W&K are themselves but not if any of the wider family were around

@Roussette but if they are reciprocating the hug thats ok because they are obviously comfortable with it

It does sound as if she is trying to throw subtle shade on Kate. Why mention her specifically? I’m very uncomfortable with hugs but I don’t think it means that I’m judgmental or stuffy. I’m not from a upper class background either. People are different, huggers aren’t better people.

I suppose the sad part of it is that for the fiction to work it requires the participation of those ‘plebs.’ Those people buying into the fiction that they are less than are the ones holding it up. That’s why I find it quite sad. Why would you think an incredibly wealthy person born into the royal family is somehow better (in any way) than a social worker from Cardiff? Or a nursery teacher from Manchester, or a doctor from Glasgow? How do you think people justify raising these people up to this god like status when there’s no reason? They don’t seem any more intelligent, any wiser, any more morally upstanding than anyone else. So what is it that makes them ‘better?’

This.

Meghan also had an online blog (The Tig), in which she did a not too flattering review of Kate and Will’s wedding. I wouldn’t mind betting that Kate had heard about that.

@Roussette but we don't know how they behave in private , this is just a snipet of one encounter.
If you look at older pictures kate seems to if had a great relationship with Harry at one time, laughing and joking in public so can assume they were more relaxed behind closed doors
Some people are by nature just more reserved
The choice was wether to marry into the family

The people who can see the offence in her behaviour can read the subtle subtext of her reporting. Maybe she hatched it in advance as a dare with her frosty mate Jessica just like ancient teenagers would? 'I dare you to dress like this and behave like that and let me know what happens!' She would have run it past Harry but as we know, he stopped having his own opinions the day he met her so he would not have told her she was wrong.

It ties in with what the palace staff said about her looking for a battle and not wanting to fit in when they were trying to help her settle in her role. She doesn't like being told what to do or how to behave which is fine but then she shouldn't have chosen that family and a Prince and honestly wouldn't have if he was poor.

For number 3 Meghan is near white passing , her race compared to a dark black woman like me wouldn't be in her face at all. I believe her that most of her life, race hasn't been an issue. I'm as black as coal and I don't spend most of my life thinking about being black either!! It makes total sense to me.

I know several friends of mixed backgrounds who are pretty clueless on race because they are white passing. I have also heard people say to my face they could date a mixed race woman but couldn't date a black girl.

So when she was thrust into the media, her race was a big thing, I'm not saying in a nasty way, many people celebrated it, but it would have been the first time she would have her non-white status made a big deal.

So number 3 doesn't surprise me at all.

Oh the terribleness of it! Wait, what did she say? Nothing much! Get over it!

exactly. they just seem like kind of boring and nice. very much middle of the road personality.
I can't see what everyone is talking about at all

@Doubtmyself i agree with you on this and was my thinking , was just replying to the poster too
When meghan and harry became an item it was in papers about her race( i doubt for right reasons)
Many people hadn't probably realised
And it appears from friends that almost the more black you are the more racism sometimes

And number 4 , if its say Princess Anne, it causes such a scandal for his father and her as his rep when he's engaged abroad, I don't think they could reveal .

It’s not just learning about that culture, it’s respecting it as well. I’m NOT a hugger but dh comes from a culture where people kiss when greeting each other. I have to suck it up. I also hated when people from his family criticised my British reservedness. That’s who we are and it’s well known.
I think Kate is probably very guarded with people and it would take a long time to get in her inner circle.

@Doubtmyself but by not revealing do you not think it then implicates all of them and people to assume its xy or z.
Maybe they think they called it out at the time to whoever , who knows but it leaves everybody under suspicion and the culprit not having to answer to it