Harry and Meghan -- Why I dislike them BOTH

[PipinwasAuntieMabelsdog]

I keep seeing threads that say everyone who dislikes the Sussexs is based on some form of racism and I wanted to put my view across. I will set the parameters of my points:

1. Meghan absolutely did receive racist coverage from sections of the British media.

1. I believe that there were threats to their safety by far right loons.
2. I believe they were both unhappy as working members of the RF

However...

I still find them both very disingenuous. They highlight and speak up against the racism of others, whilst failing to address Harry's previous and documented racist behaviour. As a Jew I cannot understand how Meghan can just remain silent about her husbands former mistakes. This makes her seem untrustworthy to me and seems like she will put up with anything for money and cache, whilst arguing (rightly) that racism is totally unacceptable. He keeps saying others need to learn and he is right, but he should acknowledge that he too needed to learn, acknowledge the support needed to help others learn and offer that support to others (including his own family, if needed).

Their attitude towards the public also seems 'off' and ungrateful to me and they seem to collocate the press and the public as the same thing. There is a lot of footage of the public support for them before, during and after their wedding. Yet, apparently, they did not want the big public wedding and the 'UK' was racist towards them. Harry particularly understands the 'deal' between the monarchy and the public and ought to have explained this to Meghan, the comments re the wedding on Oprah came across as quite spiteful and tone deaf. Almost like, 'we suffered through the big wedding for the plebs.' Ditto all the strange behaviour around Archie's birth. They could have followed the Tindall's approach if they wanted to avoid press intrusion.

During financial pressures around the world they are still complaining and not acknowledging their wealth and privilege, whilst claiming to give voice to the needs of those living in poverty and suffering. The Africa interview was a prime example for both of them. It just all comes together to make them feel untrustworthy to me, and makes me dislike them. I do not wish them any ill, but I wish they would acknowledge their fortune and live private, useful lives.

@twinklystar23 If harry wins this case and has security returned, it will be paid for by the american taxpayers under the IPP scheme. As he is unlikely to live in the UK with his family, its unlikely to be an issue. I should imagine the government would change the law to change the rules because america would not be happy

I thought from the engagement announcement, with Harry in his nest blue suit looking uncomfortable and as though he was begrudgingly obliging the press but also clearly in love with Meghan; and Meghan in her too-big heels and ill-fitting coat, California curls/waves in her hair, doing that half wave thing American actresses do where they bend their hands at the knuckle with spine curved outwards and veneers on display and boobs thrust forward - ohhhhh shit. This is going to end BADLY.

Fast forward, and just do the accounting. Net net, Harry has lost. Despite his words (many, many, many words), I don’t believe a word of it. He’d been supported, propped up, provided for, coddled, protected, been more British than almost all Brits, his identity that of a top member of a ridiculously exclusive club and NEVER had to suffer the consequences of his action. Even now, he knows the RF will step in if he really needs them to. Not to say that even now he isn’t in a very small club of Uber privileged people living in gilded cages (at least his cage is gilded). But my, how he’s fallen. Five years into this marriage, he’s still in thrall to “freedom”, marriage, fatherhood and all that California bullshit. Give it time and a different therapist or four. The scales will fall. He won’t be the first or the last. Marry in haste, repent at leisure.

Meghan, on the other hand, has won. How her life has changed. Presumably not in the way she thought it would, and I doubt she knew the exact parameters or shape or size of the bounty she was working her way towards or, indeed, the resoundingly negative toll that her exposure must have landed her with. But there’s no denying that net net, she’s a winner. Certainly next to him, she’s “earned” her bounty whether you view her methods as nefarious, dishonest, underhand, duplicitous, manipulative or the opposite.

I have ZERO doubt in mind that she knew what she wanted right from the beginning and has maintained control over herself and Harry since then. Zero. She’s utterly transparent. He, for himself, is stupid and wounded and messed up and spoiled and arrogant. He sounds utterly awful to live with! But she went there. She went where no other woman dared tread because she was that focused on her end goal.

Good luck to them both. I don’t care for them or the RF. But it’s a fascinating watch (their bits; the RF’s bits are dull as fuck. They’re clever like that.)

I am just sick hearing about them. They've left the country. Harry is making an appearance at the coronation. Bully for him. Disgraceful that he has a four book deal. More muck raking.

Partyandbullshit · Yesterday 23:13

Brilliant exposition! Completely agree

I think it sounds unhinged myself.

Excellent post.

As I understand it, if he wins then the process of making the decision about his security will have to be reviewed, but it doesn't mean he will automatically get security. The case is about the process of deciding whether he (and his family) automatically get security while in the UK or have it reviewed each time he visits, it isn't about whether he should or shouldn't get security IYSWIM

It's the process of deciding that's being reviewed, not the decision itself. Even if the court say the process should be changed, it could be changed but the final decision (to decide on a trip-by-trip basis) remain the same.

Which is why it is even more of a temper tantrum - Harry isn't claiming that he (+family) have ever been denied adequate security. Or even that that the decision to review his security needs each time he visits is wrong (though that comes across as his issue). But that the process of deciding that his security will be decided on the basis of need each time he visits is flawed.

And as tax payers we are paying for the lawyers having to respond to this cr*p

Absolutely spot on!!!

Thanks, it's clear it's just Harry having a hissy fit along the lines 'don't you know who I am?!' Presumably it's wasting his own money too.

I honestly think the palace have played a blinder in how they’ve have handled the whole situation, from the queen on, nothing but positivity or silence, it has absolutely fucked harry and Meghan.

as it makes it so one sided. First Oprah. Then a six part Netflix series rehashing it in more detail. Then spare doing rhe same again, whilst the palace are giving it we miss and love them. It looks so bad on them.

Couldn't agree more. From massively positive popularity ratings, particularly in america, they are behind the very dubious prince, andrew!

Maybe now they have learned a lesson, that less in more, and concentrate on their supposed good works

Hopefully, yes.

They can enjoy their family and their luxury lifestyle - based as much on unearned wealth as the rest of the RF. They can have the privacy they want, can play polo and support charities as they want. Recognise that 99.99% of the world don't have that option open to them, and appreciate their good luck.

All good.

@mixedrecycling Hallelujah. And hopefully I have the option to just ignore them.

I thought from the engagement announcement, with Harry in his nest blue suit looking uncomfortable and as though he was begrudgingly obliging the press but also clearly in love with Meghan; and Meghan in her too-big heels and ill-fitting coat, California curls/waves in her hair, doing that half wave thing American actresses do where they bend their hands at the knuckle with spine curved outwards and veneers on display and boobs thrust forward - ohhhhh shit. This is going to end BADLY.

What a vile post.

No wonder they left. You never gave her a chance, this was as they got engaged 😮

That post tells me everything I need to know about you.

Well done Harry & Meghan leaving this sort of toxicity behind

Huh? How is it vile or toxic for my reaction to be "oh shit, this is going to end badly" when it was obvious (to me) that the cultural gap between these two people was so glaringly huge? And, before you say anything, nothing to do with race (I'm neither British nor white myself). They come from totally different worlds. TOTALLY different. He's the embodiment of privilege, literally (en)titled, never had to lift a finger, barely scraped an A Level despite the best education and nepotism money and connections could buy, never had to earn a living, never had to budget, ALWAYS had a huge cushion between him and the "real" world, never had to think for himself or make consequential decisions for himself, always been buffered and picked up after.

She, on the other hand, had worked her way to wherever she was. While not raised in poverty (seems like she had a fairly middle class upbringing), she certainly had first hand knowledge of household budgeting, of earning a living, of auditions and rejections, of striving and working for what you have. She will have had to do tonnes of things herself and by herself, without lackeys or assistants or people watching out for her, knowing nobody is going to provide for her (I'm assuming, maybe I'm wrong). She's a walking, talking mega-brain and high-achiever on sticks compared to him!

And yet, she chose THIS man - this numpty son of the future King of England - to marry. Having been married before! Why? Why on earth would she put herself through it? I wonder...

I know many, many, many cross-cultural marriages. Some inter-racial, some not. In my experience, race doesn't matter as much as cultural differences. Whether those differences are in wealth, education, mores, values, traditions, language, living as partners with so many differences on top of the issues all marriages face, is NOT easy. In many, many cases, it's been my experience that they fail. Hence my reaction: oh shit, this is going to end badly.

What, specifically, about this is toxic or vile? I can't understand. Are you saying it's toxic not to have fallen for the rags-to-riches, fairytale romance, girl loves boy who happens to be a prince, tale? Why is your reaction so extreme as to warrant such strong adjectives as "vile" and "toxic"?

Finally, you don't know anything about me! You don't even know who I am 😂

Also, why do you say I never gave "her" a chance? What made you think my opinion is on her? I never gave the marriage a chance. I still don't. See above for why.

I think you, in fact, are seeing what you want to see. Your agenda is quite clear!

Plus, of course, a very rapid move from dating to engagement to marriage. So not much time to understand and work through the differences.

I've always thought that the speed of things was a big part of the problem - all the 'want to hit the ground running' was a bit odd. What 'ground'? It was obviously going to be a huge change to become a working royal, and no way anyone would be able to make the transition easily and quickly.

and Meghan in her too-big heels and ill-fitting coat, California curls/waves in her hair, doing that half wave thing American actresses do where they bend their hands at the knuckle with spine curved outwards and veneers on display and boobs thrust forward - ohhhhh shit.

This bit^ vile, judgmental, prejudice against her as an actress, ‘American actress’ in fact, critiquing every tiny moment. Oh how glad I am they left. What judgemental, sexist snooty words. Yuck.

I mean, each element of that bit you've quoted is factually accurate. I don't subscribe to the whole "my truth" versus truth. The truth doesn't have to be pretty. In fact, most adults who don't live in a Disney-fied alternative reality, are well aware it isn't!

It's quite an achievement to seek out and find judgement, prejudice, critique, sexism AND snootiness in that short factual statement. Well done!

(Separately, suggest you research what "passing judgement" is. It's not anything I wrote.)

How is it vile or toxic for my reaction to be "oh shit, this is going to end badly"

But that isn't all you said is it?

too big heels
ill fitting coat
'california' waves
boobs stuck out
veneers

You really couldn't be any more disparaging about another women if you tried. If you don't see it, there is nothing I can say

Finally, you don't know anything about me! You don't even know who I am

Believe me, I don't want to.

With posts like this... I've said my bit and it's best to leave you to attack a woman you don't know the first time you saw her, and judge her on every single thing about her appearance in the most bitchy way imaginable.

No point in engaging with you, to be honest. You ask me what is wrong with what you say. See above. I have explained it.

It's quite an achievement to seek out and find judgement, prejudice, critique, sexism AND snootiness in that short factual statement. Well done!

Not sought, read. I read your words and that is what I see.

Honestly, with posts like these three since my last post, I feel like some posters live on another planet/in an alternate reality. It only ever happens on the Royal Family board, in my years on MN, and only ever wrt Meghan and Harry. There's something off about them, compared to the rest of the forum. It's like deliberate myopia plus vested interests, and a touch of propaganda or PR or some other type of will to influence. So, so weird.

You have to not say that kind of stuff, or you get deleted for troll hunting.

I agree, there seems to be some weird reality thing going on here.