Member of Household resigns

[myrtleWilson]

Awful story just broken on twitter about horrendous racist questioning from Lady Hussey to Ngozi Fulani from Sister Space at yesterdays VAWG event.

Lady Hussey has resigned.

[Edited by MNHQ to correct typo at OP's request]

Because she didn’t want to. It’s not information she’s required to provide. Nobody is entitled to information about anyone’s racial or ethnic heritage.

Why didn't she just say 'I'm British but my parents came here in the 50s' and state the country in the first place . What is racist about asking about people's heritage

If someone asks me where I'm from and I say Essex, I don't add that my parents are actually from SE London.

Yes I agree - Lady Susan saw her as someone ‘other’ hence the ‘othering’

I agree but I was replying to a poster talking about the RF discussing what Archie may look like. It was wrong of Lady S to behave like that during service and towards a complete stranger who expected to be received cordially and she should have kept her hand to herself. However, 'where are you from?' is a really common question in London when they read my name and I am happy to explain my ancestry in my cut glass accent to literally any person who is interested.

The racist comments on these thread are so embarrassing.

@LookingAtYou It is racist because it strongly implies that you’re not from here. When you ask someone such questions like “Where are you from?” Or even “Where are you really from?” You’re suggesting that they don’t belong here. Why does it matter where her parents are from? It’s extremely presumptuous to question someone’s heritage and it has racial undertones because of the othering aspect of the question.

I thought that, in the first place, it was inappropriate having a team of all white ladies in waiting ( companions). They should have been paid civil servants, diverse and bound by rules and protocols defining how they behave. It doesn't sound very auspicious for King Charles' tenure if they are going to advertise, essentially, that they like their own kind. They lost an opportunity to demonstrate how they wanted the monarchy to reflect the roles and lives of ordinary people.

And this poor lady spoken to and handled in such a manner - insulted - when there are vital issues and topics to be speaking about and learning about and that she knows about, and is in a position to educate people about. Albeit, this was a introductory converse, the aide ought to have been tuned in and all ears to hear what the lady had to say, not to be questioning her on a detail which only mattered to her the questioner, and which I doubt would have mattered to her boss the Queen Consort, Camilla . That's bad enough but the style was just so derogatory.

This suggests that the aide giving offence had no training whatsoever.

Obviously, Charles is keen to be showing that he wants the monarchy to advocate for all people. I deduce that from many of his actions and the care taken with detail.

This aide was such a bad choice, it seems

Exactly right Hattie.

It was not intended to be offensive.

That is the problem, it was....instinct.

i find it really odd that a younger person had not had several similar conversations with an older person. Really to me the reported convo flows in a typical way expected of most 80+ yr olds.
i’m Canadian and the heritage (who immigrated here when) is a common everyday topic much like the weather.
SH has been reprimanded, fine but the person who reported this doesn’t come across well.

I had that done to me when I was in 20s.

Once as a waitress - man leaned over moved my hair and started at name badge and another meeting a more senior man moved by jacket - I think in both cases it was some kind of powerplay but I have well defined personal space and tend to be OTT with surprises - so involutory jumped back and made noise which brought more senior people over immediately to step in and politely wtf at them and keep them away rest of time.

Was on train with a friend and a ticket inspector leaned over and pull her T-short to read it - everyone who saw in carriage though that bloody odd - asked if we were alright.

So I agree it's really not normal behavior in public between complete strangers.

You really need to read more around this issue.

Read the Daily Mail’s best rated comments on this story if you want to increase your heart rate.

It is shocking how she could have been so clueless and didn't like the first answer, so kept going on about it.

I had a similar incident when taking my daughter to a hospital in London, its more than 10 years ago now, the nurse asked me where is 'she from' nodding towards my daughter, I gave her our nationality and she persisted, 'no, I mean, where is SHE from ?' then it clicked that she assumed my daughter was adopted. I did explain DD was mixed race and told her my husbands heritage, , I can't say I was offended, but I was taken aback.

That being said, my daughters are very proud of their heritage, and if asked where thy are from, they will say our nationality which is the country they were born in and same as their dad was born in, however they usually do add they are half my heritage and half their dads heritage.

With regard to asking a white person where they are from, if you ask most Americans that question, they will surely answer you that they are from wherever in the US but are Irish or Italian or Polish or whatever, from their great, great, great grandparents. I am not so sure if the same is true for Europeans, and I do know a few Aussies who will add that their parents are from UK or Asia or wherever..

Educating the palace worthies is not enough- there needs to be root and branch pruning so that bad attitudes to race, class, background and whatever other unsavoury prejudices and habits they have are expunged.

Charles needs to get over any misplaced loyalties and pretty damn quick.

Exactly this! And deal with the Church of England at the same time because the exact same racist, classist and supercilious sentiments run through our Anglican churches.

I'm seated already but thanks for the 'permission'.

I'm not excusing anything; I'm merely suggesting that there may be some mitigation. Clearly, this wasn't an acceptable thing to say, and Lady Susan has fallen on her sword, which is right and proper. Touching her hair though strikes me as the worst part of this episode.

I have an aunt who's a couple of years older than Lady Susan, and omg the things she comes out with would make your hair stand on end - nothing racial, I hasten to add! The last time I visited her, she told me I look better with my glasses on than off, and asked if I had ever considered wearing a foundation garment... She's the kindest soul though! She makes me laugh! She has always been brutally direct but age has magnified it. I could well imagine her making comments like that, and she wouldn't mean the slightest thing by it. She just opens her mouth and whatever's in her head comes right out.

I'm sorry but I can't deem the entire RF to be racist on the basis of ill-judged remarks made by an elderly woman, who isn't a member of the family anyway. I don't know if Lady S is racist or not. No doubt it will all come out in the wash now if she is, because she will have been in these situations many times over the years, and I'm sure if anyone else was the subject of such an interrogation, they will now come forward.

Lady Hussey is 83! She''s from a very privileged white background. She's from a generation when race was thought of very differently to how it is now. I know many people of that generation who do not understand how things have changed and how modern etiquette around race is very different.

What she said was wrong, but it's a reflection her own experiences of living in a majority white environment. Ngoni Fulani knew what Lady Hussey meant and was deliberately answering in an ambiguous and passively aggressive way.

The palace have responded appropriately to her complaints so what more can they do?

Lady Susan ought to be aware not to ask someone where they're "really" from, especially given her role

That's what beats the hell out of me about this appalling report - after all Lady Susan followed the late Queen around for years meeting all manner of people, and frankly I'd have expected her to know better

I'd also like to know where the truth lies between the palace's claim that they've "reached out" to Ngoni Fulani and her own claim not to have heard from them

I know many people of that generation who do not understand how things have changed and how modern etiquette around race is very different.

Then they should make way for more informed people.

Now imagine that the Asian parent is invited to a special event to celebrate all they have done for the local community, but is greeted by a total stranger who is only interested in asking them questions about their heritage based on their colouring.

Not so enjoyable now is it?

I agree - even before the awful stuff she said, moving someone else’s hair who you don’t know is totally unnecessary & belittling! I also would have slapped her hand I think. Horrid woman!

@FancyFanny the point is that this lady was a reprasentative of the Palace, and of our Royal family. Just because your 80 year old aunt may spout similar stuff in her living room does not make this ok on any level.

The Royal family and anyone who advocates/represents for them are meant to represent the UK and are held to a higher standard than aunt Edith in her living room. This Lady was meant to be welcoming people on behalf of the Queen Consort. Do you honestly think this is an acceptable way to welcome someone to the Palace?

She must have either developed a degenerative condition or started on the booze early. Neither HMQ not the staff would ever have let her attend such events if they had the slightest inkling of her behaving like that. it is a massive setback for them. Diana would not have made her a godmother to William. It is obvious that there is more to this story

Same old shit, comparing racism against black people with you as a white person being asked about you glasses by your aunt.

Buy a clue and fuck your mitigation.

Er maybe listen and try to learn about racism, and how it affects people, and educate themselves. Stop trying to blame Ngoni, she answered the question.

What? Seriously, what is it you’re trying to say? As that’s basically gibberish. If (from what I’ve picked up) you’re saying Ngozi Fulani ‘doesn’t come across well’, do please explain why.