I’m surprised it took so long for “news” to emerge that W&K find H&M’s actions selfish. It was the first thought I had, along with why 3 is a good number of children to have. The spare has upped and left, leaving the heir to do everything.
A similar thing happened to me with one of my siblings. But we’d talked about it at length before it happened (our spouses don’t get on so it was between us). It obvs wasn’t about royal duties, but it was about caring for elders, inheritances etc. Really long and difficult conversations, which still aren’t over years down the line. And our relationship has materially weakened, at the same time as the distancing that naturally comes when you start your own families, and the distancing that come with emigrating.
H&M’s actions have been unspeakably selfish viz W&K (and I’m no Kate fan). I think thats why K ignored them both at the Commonwealth service. They’d just fucked her and her kids over, big time, without a by-your-leave. There’s really no coming back from that. H might try to spin a line later (so stressed out, so much going on, I just couldn’t cope, I’m so sorry), but MM has no excuse. She was an outsider, and (like my spouse did) should have offered her husband clarity of vision, an unemotional perspective to make sure he didn’t do irretrievable damage. It’s the mature thing to do, when you’re committed to your partner’s best interests. I don’t generally go for picking holes in MM, much of what’s said about her is totally skewed and unjustified, but if my DH did it for me when he was considerably younger than MM, so could she have for H. It’s what you do for someone you love.