Lap dances, strippers and punch-ups - the Excellent Cats arrange a stag party

[TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne]

Well, the boys among them are making plans.

The lady cats are having a spa fortnight in Italy.

Bills for flights, accommodation, food, booze, medical insurance and legal fees (not to mention a fund for bribing officials at Ljubljana Prison) are allegedly being sent to an unmonitored email address.

Poor Kettle! Kitty says she’ll come & punch the ginger thug for him.

Herbie sympathises with Kettle too. He also has a ginger thug to deal with!

Would window films help regarding ginger thugs?
Breadcat says she cannot help as she is tired after keeping me up all night

Poor Kettle, it's his territory and the Pale One needs to back off, but how that happens I dunno.
With Pud (who was small and round), if I heard yowling I would go out and chase the intruder if they were bullying Pud (very rarely, it was the other way around!).
I would run towards them, clapping my hands, which made them scarper. Pud would join in, running in front of me as if he was the one responsible for the scarpering, boosting his ego a bit.
Don't know if that would work where you live @Esgaroth

We had a load of caterwauling last night, it woke me up at an ungodly hour.
It was ginger thug Timmy and another cat from the neighbourhood. Herbie was happily on the sofa, staying well out of it.
We have had lots of cats around recently, they must be coming out of hibernation. There is the Linney lookalike, a black one with white bib and feet, a long haired brown tabby and the dreaded Timmy.

Oh it's a bit my fault because I was trying to make friends with the pale fellow. But perhaps I should drive him away rather.

Kettle was adorably pathetic this time. Pale Cat was doing very impressive yowls and Kettle was responding with little meows. He would love Kitty to come and back him up 😄

I'm glad they seem to have established who is the boss though, since I assume this means it won't get physical. I don't think Pale Cat will seek him out to start trouble - he has a pretty wide territory from what I've seen.

Herbie and Timmy have very different yowls Herbie's is quite high pitched and Timmy's is low, it sounds like they're practising a vocal duet!
The problem is they haven't established who is the boss, so have had fights. Once they were on the back fence of our garden, so by rights, Herbie's territory. They were right up close to each other's faces and yowling furiously!

I had three cats trying to cuddle up to me in bed last night. (Well 4 but Frankie was sensibly behind me out of the way!). They all wanted to be the closest so kept pushing each other out of the way. This was one of the standoffs.

Cats fighting over you: highest pinnacle in cat affection, methinks! Does it happen often?

Only usually if someone other than Toad is having attention and he realises. He then has to push his way in between to get attention from both the other cat and me.

Kitty was shouting and headbutting me earlier because she thought I should be playing with her instead of sitting at my desk.

I’ve explained several times that I work so that we can live in our cosy flat & buy food & cat stuff, but the message clearly hasn’t got across.

@EmpressaurusKitty Raven can be like that too and refuses to accept that I can't work and give her all my attention.

I had a Lidl pizza earlier as a payday treat. Frank decided to help me eat it by stealing all the chicken. When I eventually gave up and let him have the rest, Fred decided to join in until Frankie bopped him around the head. Poor Fred looked so shocked 🤣 I think he's learned now not to come between his tiny brother and food!

Poor Fred!

I turned Kitty’s toy on for her & that was apparently acceptable. Although she’s perfectly capable of doing it herself.

It's gone very quiet in here this week. I hope everyone and their cats are all safe and well. I don't seem to be able to tag Broon, fingers crossed she hasn't been put on the naughty step again!

I’ve seen Broon elsewhere so I think she’s ok.

It’s Kitty’s 6th birthday a month today. Her present’s going to be catnip plants on the balcony, assuming the weather’s good enough by then.

Were the cats fighting for prime position on your bed again last night, @RumNotRun?

No,they were relatively well behaved and just lay down in an orderly line! Lexter did invade Ghostie's side of the sofa though which she wasn't happy about.

Today, Vixen is back doing her parrot impression by sitting on my shoulder. She hasn't done this all winter but now the sun is out she seems to be in parrot mode weirdly. I forgot how annoying it is!

I'm sure Kitty will love her birthday present! I haven't given my lot freshly grown catnip, mainly cause plants die around me, even the so called unkillable ones.

I’ve never had a cat who’s done that, it sounds like it’s not as much fun as it sounds though!

My balcony’s east facing so we get the morning sun - I’m hoping it’ll work.

@EmpressaurusKitty
What are you planning for Kitty's birthday?
Breadcat is 16 on Sunday and will be having roast chicken because she is my little darling

I’d love to give her a special meal, @Breadcat24, but she’s the fussiest cat I’ve ever met! We’ve tried various posh wet foods, tuna, & a lamb’s kidney at Christmas. Not interested, so it’s likely to be a lick-e-lix.

I’m veggie so that makes trying different meats more complicated. She’ll definitely have presents to open from family & friends though.

Breadcat also eats bread (naturally) so maybe Kitty would go for that

I gave the demons some catnip earlier. Toad and Raven rolled around in it and ended up covered. Vixen just lay down on top of her sprinkling and went to sleep.

Don't hold your breath!!!!

Maybe! She’s got a slightly sensitive stomach so I also have to be careful about that. She wasn’t spayed until she was 5 so having loads of litters probably helped to fuck things up. 😡

How do you know her birthday, Empress? Or is it just an estimate?

We have no idea of Kettle's birthday but I've marked the day we got him in the calendar so we can celebrate his anniversary of living with us.

If you can get unseasoned precooked chicken I bet Kitty would like that, though I don't know if it's available completely unseasoned. I understand you wouldn't want to cook chicken yourself.