Lap dances, strippers and punch-ups - the Excellent Cats arrange a stag party

[TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne]

Well, the boys among them are making plans.

The lady cats are having a spa fortnight in Italy.

Bills for flights, accommodation, food, booze, medical insurance and legal fees (not to mention a fund for bribing officials at Ljubljana Prison) are allegedly being sent to an unmonitored email address.

Wow, I see what you mean about Frank being little Rum. When you put him next to Lexter it really does show

Lex isn't even a particularly big cat. Frankie has been cuddly and brave tonight, jumping up onto my lap even though Miss Hissy Pants Raven was already there. He just ignored her and sat on my chest purring.

Wow. We need more cats to prevent this.

Kitty has just started learning to use the computer, with a focus on spreadsheets.

Toad is quite adept chatting on Teams. Some would say he writes gibberish, but he says they just don't speak Toad. Vix and Raven like to be cam girls during my meetings, Raven in particular is quite raunchy and likes to show her rear end to everyone watching.

Stripey is good at computers. Her main role is to edit my work by walking across the keyboard.

Kettle sometimes prefers to do the job thoroughly by lying down on the entire keyboard and rolling around a little. In his experience you can achieve some quite radical work with this method.

Would Stripey be interested in a mentorship scheme?

@Esgaroth I think she could definitely learn from him. Her technique requires a lot of energy at the moment and has marginal impact on the document. She also gets distracted by biting the edge of the computer monitor, which is not very productive.

Snowycat has little interest in computers and is not cut out for a career in tech, though she does like the reflections they make on walls.

This morning, Kitty climbed up onto the roof of her eyrie - first time as far as I know. She had a wash & enjoyed the view while I waited to see how she was going to get down. I was half expecting a flying leap onto the sofa.

It took a lot of thought & a couple of tries, but she balanced one front paw on the porthole, got the other one on to the top platform & came down normally from there. And after all that excitement she’s now recovering under the duvet.

Agatha is definitely getting the hang of touch-screens. Thankfully my work laptop doesn't have one, but it has an active touch pad for a mouse. She will walk across, show her bum to the camera in meetings etc. but doesn't actively join in. She will, however, swipe my phone screen if I'm not giving scritches correctly because I'm reading / playing a game. She also loves a reel with sound if there's kittens. Funnily enough, my algorithms mean 99% of reels are cats, so.....

Gizmo is sending an important missive to GT, c/o Grumpy's house.

He's engaged a courier service.

So now we won't get to see any incriminating lovely photos of the stag do. 🧐

There aren't enough cat gifs on here so I found one with lots of cats on!
Some look a bit scary though

I’m pretty sure this is who Kitty’s channelling when she scales her tower.

You have to keep an eye on cats and computers. I once pressed enter on what they had typed into the Google search bar and the first link was to something about a cult. I'm not sure if they were planning to join a cult or start one, but I've been keeping an eye out ever since. Boris does seem to think all humans exist to worship him, so he's my prime suspect.

Linney has been having talks with the putative stag-do participants.

If your cats have been on a Zoom call today, I regret that this was on the agenda.

Vixen has at least Toad and Lexter under control. Fred is too scared to go on the stag. Frankie thinks he may prefer to stay home and eat chicken and have snuggles.

The boys are getting ready...

Oh. I saw the plus button where you usually add a photo on the app and thought we'd had our cat pics restored, but no. Sigh.

Lexter did a special face with his tongue poking out to say hi to you all.

I think I’m going to come off MN for now. Quite disturbed by the CSA photos and the response to it plus having to accept cookies or pay for the privilege seems a bit much.

I will miss you all 😢 and the idiot sisters will be sorry to miss the wedding of the year.

didn’t want to disappear without saying goodbye x

I wondered if any from here was going to leave. We will miss you loads @HouseofHolbein and of course we'll miss the idiot sisters too. Perhaps some wise person on here will come up with an alternative.

Oh @HouseofHolbein I will miss you and the idiot sisters too. The latest thing does seem to add to all the reasons not to be on here (the tone of some of the posts are horrible these days, I was ok with the old level of viper-ness but now it's just deliberate and nasty contrarians)

I hope the idiot sisters will still come on the holiday, @HouseofHolbein. We’ll miss you.

I’m staying for now.

Sorry to hear that @HouseofHolbein . It's sad that whilst we enjoy innocently posting cat pictures, people have apparently posted such awful things, which I am relieved not to have seen, and sorry for those who did.
I will stay as I haven't even been on here posting for long, although I read stuff on here for years. But it does seem quite unfriendly on some other threads. I posted something in AIBU and virtually had a character assassination based on one word I had used!

Thank you for your glorious pictures of the Idiot Sisters @HouseofHolbein they are in my Top 10 cats! (TBH my Top 10 is elastic though 😸) I hope you return when the time is right. Best wishes to you and the 3 bonneted ladies. 💐