Baby Reindeer - Netflix

[Spratt]

Got a day off today so I’m binging Baby Reindeer. Two episodes in and it’s great so far, I see that it’s previously been a stage show but I’ve never heard of it so looking forward to finding out what happens. It’s about a comedian being stalked by a woman in her 40s.

This was excellent. Would recommend watching all 7 episodes. Found out afterwards that it's a true story - the lived experience of the writer and main actor Richard Gadd! Love his honesty and insights throughout this whole process.

Love his honesty and insights throughout this whole process

Same. It was brilliant. At points I wanted to shout at him but episode 6 I wanted to reach through the screen and just hold him and let him cry.

So brave of him and really important to highlight such issues.

I haven't finished the series yet. My take is that he was very good at not making decisions (which in itself is a choice). I found that frustrating but isn't that what lots of people are like? I feel uncomfortable about saying that he brought everything onto himself.

He also seems to use people - his ex girlfriend and her mum and now his transgender girlfriend.

A fantastic series so far though.

He blamed others.

He used others.

He was a shit comedian why carry on putting yourself through it.

He kept listening to the "compliment" voicemails

I kept thinking why is Teri with him. No personality no looks no house and a liar

SA does mess you up but I think that was just his personality.

I thought this too @unwatchthread in the first few episodes - that I didn't get why he was acting this way - but I think the later episodes show that he was bad at establishing boundaries and why.

I did also think that a woman being stalked would definitely not have behaved in the same way. Weirdly I know 2 men who have been stalked - one who was also very nice to his stalker when she would turn up unexpectedly on his doorstep and felt sorry for her. The other ended up sleeping with his stalker!

I don't know any women who have been stalked though.

I agree he's deeply unlikeable! A lot was all about his ego.

I’m very pleased to read this thread. I found him incredibly unlikable but after the denouement in episode four it all became much more understandable.

But even so it was all about his vanity wasn’t it and there were loads of instances where he could’ve quite reasonably stopped it or put some effort into stopping it.

Very aware I’m victim blaming here. I’m not very proud of it.

some mild spoilers ahead…

I suppose it was linked to his feelings of having no self worth and being conflicted about his sexuality and even though it was totally warped Martha gave him that validation.

I found the bit near the end when he went back to the abuser and was still willing to work with him the most tragic.

he was absolutely a victim and this had a huge impact on all his actions going forward but, and I hate that I say this because she has a obviously caused him and may others a great deal of pain, she was too.

Martha's inability to string a proper sentence together in written form infuriated me more than it should.

What you're saying is true though.
When he shagged Martha, I was like 'what the fuck are you doing, man?'
And as for going back to his abuser, come on. Some serious lapses of judgement happening.

Wasn't the sex scene with Martha I'm his imagination?

Blimmin Eck. That scene was disturbing.

I'm curious how much is actually what happened to him.

Great series.

Amazing to. Made even more so by being a true story.
ep 4 is indeed harrowing and I nearly gave up but it really does give the foundation for the story.
short episodes means I watched in one longish sitting Last night and today have welled up a couple of times thinking about him.
I have some similar experiences to the different themes in the show and think he was incredibly brave and strong to make this and to make it so nuanced.
very clever, best thing I’ve seen in years, sort of fleabag vibe in places but far darker and the obvious Misery comparison .

lol, there speaks the voice of experience, understanding and empathy

@Motnight

Oh, how interesting. I thought it had really happened. Maybe on one of the occasions he had followed her home, but can't remember exactly.
Can anyone else confirm or deny?

That's how I saw it. It didn't really happen.

Yes it was but the other comment ref returning to the abuser is woefully ill informed

That was part of the story though, that, and the fact Martha didn't actually have an iPhone.

@slavetoloverhythm

I am an empathic and understanding person. But there are limits.
It's not like he's an abused woman with kids, forced to stay with a man. He chose to go back. In the end, he couldn't cope as he needed to get his ego kick from somewhere.
I appreciate this won't be a popular view, but there we are.

I think that the series really showed that escaping an abuser isn't just about physical safety.

And the grapple by the canal. Everything so odd

He finds out she is a convicted stalker really early on and still continues to carry on and when he goes along with her because his friends are there it was all just so strange and why didn’t he go to the police really soon?

The "grapple" was sexual assault.

You’re right. I know I shouldn’t be blaming him but so much of it seems inexplicable.

Why don’t you just walk away from her by the canal? Why didn’t he just block her email?

She was an overweight middle-aged woman who appeared anything but threatening and I got the impression he was embarrassed to admit that he was scared of her.