Post your favourite The IT Crowd quotes here... with no context

[PaperbackBlighter]

Willies, willies... I love willies.

A fire...at a Sea Parks?

And, last but not least, none of this would have ever been possible without.... THE TOILET CLEANERS!!!!

Leg disabled

That’s what I do! I lie and I lie and I lie!

FOUR FIVE FIRE

It's Vista. We're going to die.

I'm a woman.

I mean, I don’t expect to be put on a pedal stool.
Followed closely by
I must say I consider this whole case to be a damp squid.

First rule of Street Countdown. Is that you really must try and tell as many people as possible about it. It's a rather fun game and the more people you tell about it the better.

memory IS RAM

What funeral?

I'll just get some of my coats.

Our twins. Quasar and Zenith.

I love cuke. It's heaven in a can.

It was like breaking up with the joker.

Moss football commentary:
"Hooray. He’s kicked the ball. Now the ball’s over there. That man has it now. That’s an interesting development. Maybe he’ll kick the ball. He has indeed and apparently that deserves a round of applause."

Prepare to put mustard on those words, for you will soon be consuming them along with this slice of humble pie that comes direct from the oven of shame set at gas mark egg on your face! …I sort of forget what I was talking about.

Yes, that is a word! And the joke does make sense!

She's fallen to the communists! Well, they do have some convincing arguments.

Would I blow everybody's mind, if I ate my dessert first?

I'm not putting it up to 8, Moss, it'll blow my cock off!

Oh no, it's set in the eighties.

Oh, poppet, to think when we met, you were so worried that you came from Iran...

You wouldn’t shoot a policeman…and then steal his helmet. You wouldn’t go to the toilet in his helmet and then send it to the policeman’s grieving widow…and then steal it again!

I'm sorry for your loss... it's not like losing a pen is it? Do you want a pen?

If she'd had said her parents died in a fire I'd be much happier

I thought it could work because you look like a man

From Goth to Boss!

It’s too Soviet

Damp squid

I'm trapped, like a moth in a bath!

“I want you to be my PA”
“Really?”
“Stephanie’s leaving”
“Definitely!”
“No, StephANie”.