It really is extraordinary how many transwomen come from military backgrounds. That's not a snide remark, it's genuine.
And, anecdotally, it's very often the male parent, the father, who is aggressively rigid in their gendered thinking. No son of mine... type of thing.
Jane you must know that women, particularly gender critical women, don't buy the narrative you're selling. The most effeminate/feminine male is still male. And society needs to accept that. (And parents).
We need to get away from classing traits and behaviours as innately male or female. If they are displayed by a man, they are male. Same with women.
It also appears, to me, that anyone with an ounce of perception, can read between your lines to see a different narrative. Whether you deliberately obscure or just can't help it, is not a question that can be answered on an Internet forum.
I don't wish ill for you or any tranwoman. You are evidently as much a product of patriarchy as anyone else.
But I am a gender critical feminist. Women are uniquely defined by their chromosomes, resulting in sex characteristics. They are oppressed on that basis.
No-one gets to redefine that. If you don't see sex, you can't see sexism.