EASTENDERS 17 - NO SPOILERS

[Blondeshavemorefun]

Soooooooooooooooooooooooo

when will stephen die/tel lauren he isnt dying

Max is shagging carmel to gain info and will break her heart when gets dumped

will sonja get with sexy teacher

what will happen to mick, linda,whitney, fi pub

stacey is getting huge and martin still drinking away her wages,. what was the point in her working there and how do they afford the rent when they couldnt when had 4 adult paying/working living there

will baby come early, think we said due xmas

bobby is also due to come back soon, had 3 years will be ut in 18mths for good behaviour,providing he hasnt walloped anyone over the head again .....

so i think he will come home at xmas and then max will do something to him ......

phil is soooooooooo rich, with assets everywhere and all being divided between shazza, denny, ben, lou, jay and of course raymond, who will no doubt come back into ee at 18 so roughly 2035

anymore of michell and tube man/boyfriend

will jack shag his norway nanny, course he will

I think I need to complain to the BBC about these bra straps!

Why did Sharon not run over to the car lot to find Phil? She just stood there like a lemon. She reminds me of Miss Piggy.

And Ian should have gone to get Jane.

Abi is delusional.

The bra straps do my nut in Abi isn't right is she? she probably dipped that test in pregnant cat piss or something.

I have a deep red coloured bra like that ...it's a very nice colour and it's quite comfy. No falling straps ✋.

Why are the bins in EE always filled with soft things? So when people land on them it's like falling on cushions. Realistically, a bin bag may have all sorts of jagged waste in it so falling on one shouldn't be a lucky break.

Pregnant cat piss 😹. I find it disturbing that Abi works with animals. She is one disturbed individual thanks to Babe!

I am sure your Bra and straps are lovely because you wear it properly .

Thanks MrsJayy

But Phil's got enough padding on his bum Hate that I won't matter what's in the bin bag.

To be fair, MrsJayy none of the characters should be "right" the amount they all have to go through. I'm surprised that characters like Denise, Sharon and the dearly departed Ronnie can string any coherent sentences together with they have endured.

Eew Phil's bum. I wonder if it's as smooth as his head? Bad images..must erase.

Ha ha yes I found it hilarious that 5 people had to ask 'where's phil' and look horror struck before anyone actually went to find him (the whole 10m away) and he had been sat there the whole time waiting for someone to turn up when he was clearly capable of standing up anyway.

Also now Mock has wound up in Fi's flat will he suss that she's shagging Max and the whole game will be up? Its not that he's the sharpest tool in the box, mind, but the whole plot is so thin even Mock could see through it surely?

I thought that, mock will see 'lush bald head rub' and think 'huh, max lives in this gaff with ms Fi'
If he saves the square is up for debate.

Or because Jack said Mock hasn't cheated and Linda is now 'thinking', will Mock shag Linda thinking their marriage is already over? Then he will be overcome with guilt and will have to tell her as they bond over Sausage's hospital bed.! And maybe Fi the hard nosed businesswoman will be overcome with guilt as she realises she has 'feelings' for Mock and won't be able to go through with taking the bar from him.

Nah he will find some post addressed to Max or spot a jacket that Max will then wear in the pub and we will see Mock squinting and the lightbulb moment in his head. Though there if that is the case, it will be too late as Jane will tell everyone if she survives unless she is too ill to speak. I hope she survives.

mock will see 'lush bald head rub' and think 'huh, max lives in this gaff with ms Fi'

Laughed so much at that.

In reality, mock would stand there rubbing his chin, gormless as always, thinking 'bet that Fi has a wig on...'

I really hope Jane doesn't dieI like jane and i am glad they didn't better in a fortnight story like Ronnie got when she came out of her coma.

Surely an explosion would make the local news radio station yet nobody ever seems to know anything in the Square unless they see it themselves.

Mock will get it all wrong, try to whip off Fiona's 'wig' and be done for GBH. Max will have to bin the hair rub, grinning his evil grin and live to fight another day.

Thanks for the compliments on my summary Theycalledmethewildrose and BadHairDay0.

I'm new to this thread, despite having been on Mumsnet for over 2 years, and having been quite a hardcore Eastenders fan since I was a little girl, and I'm loving it!

I apologise for having referred to some events that may apparently happen over the next week on EE in my post. I know how annoying spoilers can be, and think I just got carried away, and accidentally wrote some things that I'd just been told by a family member in the aftermath of Tuesday's episode.

I'll try and keep it zipped next time. I have a funny feeling (not a spoiler!), that Mr Pryce will be telling himself that soon too, after he finds his trousers round his ankles, 'dabbing away' at Bex.

Sonia will find out about the 'dabbing' and get jealous. Rather than grass him up, she'll force them to break up and she'll force him to 'dab' her on regular occasions, or she'll grass. She'll get pregnant, he'll leg it back to Wales, and she'll reunite with Tina and they'll raise the baby together. Tina will also give birth to Woody's baby, and they'll all have to live in the pub as they'll both be on maternity leave and unable to afford their rent and nappies. Twatney (yes, I'm less polite), will also give birth to Woody's child and Jack will get pissed off as Woody would have fathered nearly as many children as him. He'll then end up shagging both the Nanny and Honey (surely that's going to happen), and both will of course get pregnant.

I think I need a lie down now, and no, not with Jack or Woody. Kush and tube man on the other hand, yes please!

Argeles, more children though! Considering that the ones they do have are rarely seen or heard much, i suppose a few more wont matter to add to the growing numbers.
I agree that Woody will become another Jack and cheat on Twitters.
Mr price 'dabbing ' people!

Posters on here need to stage an intervention on the BBC and force them to take you on as storyliners and script writers. Then everything will be good and EE will soar in the ratings and win all the tv awards trouncing all them norfen soaps, innit?

Well 80's, Jack's swimmers seem to have gold medal powers, so you never know!

It seems like anyone who has sex once with someone in a soap gets pregnant. None of them can use contraception, or maybe they buy their condoms from Fat Elvis, and the women must be constantly ovulating ffs! I know it is possible to shag once and get pregnant, but please, every woman in soapland.

I reckon there'll be some drama with Stacey's baby now that martins been carted off to the nick, assuming him being arrested has a point to it? Perhaps max will have to help her and that'll make him see the error of his ways? I did observe the unusually subtle PSA re terrorism in London via the medium of Bex and Mr Preston - we must live for today blah, blah - vom! I think that literally anything could happen at this point - aliens, the return of dirty den?

Tobee, Nancy would write Sonia out in the most awful fashion possible before the watershed!
Argeles could could sort out the whole Max/ Fi/ linda / woody thing.
We could bring back Ev and Grant.
Between us all we could all turn it around. If only eh?

I would be a national hero for getting rid of Sonia & Robbie!

Mr Dabber isn't even that attractive he is a bit wet and says stuff in inspirational quotes Sonia reminds me of Harry enfields "ooo young man"

If I can get rid of the Spams at the same time they might even start a bank holiday in my honour