that's interesting, lessstressed. the J/G thing is a mess of motives, control, power, threats etc. G has all the power of her position and social standing and all the threats that she's laying upon J's head... but J has the physical power and I think that cannot be underplayed... once things get going, so to speak, I do believe it is Jamie who has the upper hand. Consent is very very dubious on both sides - you can also argue that G didn't really know what she was asking for. I always read that scene as J asserting control at the end in the only way available to him.
Regardless - I thought despite the clumsy way DG handled it (actually that's not true - i think the ambiguity of that scene was well done, but she should let everyone of her readers make up their minds rather than intervene so heavy handedly and patronisingly to "explain" herself) it was a pivotal episode in Jamie's life and in his character arc.
Jamie is a loving, generous, loyal, brave (etc etc etc) man, but he is by no means perfect and while he has suffered a lot, he has also of course made many mistakes during his life (though the biggest and most damaging one is surely to do with Roger), which make him so well rounded and human and surely one of the reasons we love him so much as a character.
I find it fascinating that all of Jamie's "mistakes" (Ian, Willie, Fergus, Roger etc etc) are so close to him emotionally and such constant reminders of his humanity and vulnerability. While Claire gets to leave her crap in the past (or rather, in the future), Jamie can never escape what he has done.
Anyway it will be interesting to see how they choose to deal with it in the show!