Master chef the Professionals. Marcus, come and criticise our suveè.

[Fuckerysmuckeryboilsnspornery]

A week to go till we can snuggle down under a warm blanquette of jus.
What will this season fig and samphire be?

Well if you don't like cauliflower you're stuffed

Sous vide fish and cauliflower many ways. How very masterchef. It even has beignets.

Textures of cauliflower don't yer know.

The pud's got textures of raspberry too.

I hate rice pudding. Even the thought makes me want to vomit.

Caring Wareing has such a noble forehead.

Pity the jam cubes look exactly like beetroot. With herb sprinkles.

Bit of a fight there. Oh Danny.
I'd eat that, so nyarr critics.

I would bathe in rice pudding and then lick myself clean.

Cheffie/criticie disagreement there, interesting.

You can have my portion of rice pudding, if your like.

That looks nice.

I would bathe marcus and Jay in rice pudding and... Oh you know what I'm going to say.
Sitwell has big hard on for Ben.

'which is a wild plant found in estuaries', I'm picturing trendy foodies rushing to plunder their estuaries.

Ultimately, though, what the critics say doesn't seem to count, does it? They don't mark them at this stage, I seem to recall.

I bloody love milk chocolate. Much prefer it to its trendy cousin.

Is that... Foam?

It does look like it tastes great, even if it doesn't look properly mastercheffy.

I want that soooo much.
So who's going?

Ha! In yer faces critics! Go Danny!

Apple Man is for the chop.

Yeah. That's good.

I wish they'd bring Beardy Man from yesterday back, that talentless lummox deserves another shot.

Knew it!
They are all head and shoulders above previous weeks.

All through! I wonder if that means we get a round of utter duffers who all get sent home too.

Bugger off Greg. Go eat your extra G.

Until next time. I need coffee and cake.

Apparently not. But semi finals is definitely progress in the series. It's alawys hard to tell how long the heats will go on for.