Master chef the Professionals. Marcus, come and criticise our suveè.

[Fuckerysmuckeryboilsnspornery]

A week to go till we can snuggle down under a warm blanquette of jus.
What will this season fig and samphire be?

That dish looks beautiful. Shame he couldn't finish it.

He's git smears and foam on there, although I can't see the foam. Shame his chocolate didn't work.

Toby's dish looks like a dog turd half squashed into the grass.

It's. Got mango and pepper purée as well as toffee and fish. It's an abomination.

Why do they keep saying Hi biscus? Only Marcus said hib iscus

Love that Monica went straight for the toffee carrot and made that face.

So, we've already got our mad scientist and our arrogant whippersnapper.

Hi biscus is how we pronounce it in NZ so that would explain Monica.

What exactly does greg add to these proceedings? Does anyone care what he thinks, after marcus and Monica have spoken?

That lamb looks awful.

Doesn't Luciana look exactly like the gal Colin Firth got off with in Love Actually?

The bread sauce looks vile. The lamb looks disgusting. Even more so than usual.

And the bread sauce looked like mashed potato.

Peanut crunch = slightly chopped up peanuts?

Everyone disagrees with greg because he knows bugger all about cooking.

It isn faintly ridiculous to be pretending there is any doubt that toffee fish boy is going home.

Why did they bother trying to ramp up the tension with that one? It was too obvious.

Whatever happens next, none of you cooked fish and toffee sauce, so that's good.

That does look great. I can imagine we're going to see some less porcupiney cuttlefish on the plates.

That was awesome by scary Monica

I want Monica to be my personal chef.

I predict rubbery cuttlefish.

Would never have thought they'd under cook the fish.

Ewww! Dh is looking at me like as I go all squeamish.

I am horrified.