Master chef the Professionals. Marcus, come and criticise our suveè.

[Fuckerysmuckeryboilsnspornery]

A week to go till we can snuggle down under a warm blanquette of jus.
What will this season fig and samphire be?

I dunno. This critic guessing game is exactly what I would do.

The tea bag on the plate is not a nice touch.

so he's putting the actual teabag on the plate?

Used tea bag on the plate?! Crackpot.

Hahaha Jam. I hope they do.

Send 2 home?

I love Jay rayner. He's such an arse.

Forgot he had a good dessert. Send Scott home.

Save Ben!

Awwww

Bye bye Ben.

Boo. Ah well. Go Katherine and Cute Jonathan.

Off to daydream about a Marcus/Jay sandwich. See you all again soon!

Aww. Take not Chris: that's how not to look like a wanker when you go out.

Behold! Another woman!

I love Jay too. cos he's a big slab of a man
Oh Ben, at least you can go and do your GCSEs now.
Isn't it nice without cunty chops?
See you next week.

A Marcus/Jay sandwich!

I'll just have a slice of Marcus thanks.

Yes. It's so much more enjoyable without greg shovelling food into his mouth (and holding his cutlery like a toddler).

Evening. Hoping for an ethereal of anything tonight.

Chocolate is a risky move. But isn't it meant to be tough to use a fridge when tempering?

Lobster dish sounds interesting.

Toffee and carrot? Wrong.

Toffee and fish. Toffee and fish. Toffee and fish!!!

My brain refused to believe it had heard that!

These people are insane. Peanut butter and fish.

Mackrel with peanuts Is nothing, when there's toffee and fish. They can't even half heartedly pretend it might be dreadful.

Haha 5 smears.

I might need to settle a bit.