Master chef the Professionals. Marcus, come and criticise our suveè.

[Fuckerysmuckeryboilsnspornery]

A week to go till we can snuggle down under a warm blanquette of jus.
What will this season fig and samphire be?

It must feel crap to burn something on masterchef. She was so nervous.

Yes, I'm a skinny elegant southerner. diametrically opposite
Was thinking of ou Squoosh, but you couldn't be in the same studio as Marcus and remain that calm.

Ha! I'd be crawling over the table, booting Jay and Charles out of the way to get to Magnificent Marcus.

Looked lovely but no taste.

Standby : chocolate fondant alert

I'd be really disappointed if someone served me 3 teeny tiny potatoes.

Stop complaining about fondants. Gooey chocolate wins every time.

Oh dear.

Except when they've become hard little cakes, I guess.

Sad music for deceased chocolate fondant.

No gooey chocolate Kiwi

No ones sould ever do a choco,ate fondant on masterchef. You just end up regretting it in the turret of despair.

Come on Ben!

I bloody love lobster.

Other guys will have to cock up royally to keep him in.

Bet bens pannacotta is good.
Wow-yellow.

Arf@ Jay again. We can guarantee its not going to be strawberries and cream.

I hope they play Michael Jackson's Ben as sweet little Ben is given the boot.

The critics love to pretend that scoffing your face for a living is an intellectually elevated pursuit.

Plate of protein.

Is there a slug on that plate?

They like Cutie's dinner!

Well they would have to.otherwise we'd all just ignore them because we can all eat stuff and say if we like it.

The beardy one is Claire Rayner's son. I was flabbergasted about that! Ben will be sent home in a giant baseball cap and white parka to the strains of 'ooh won't you stay another daaaaayyyyyy'.

I would like to stuff my face for a living. I've got the first bit sorted. Am really good at stuffing my face.

Those cups for the soufflé are adorable.