Masterchef 4 ways: in which figs are replaced by burnt cavolo nero

[CalamitouslyWrong]

The other thread will be full before the end of tomorrow's programme (and is running very slow anyway), so here's a shiny new one.

The next programme blurb on the bbc website says that failure is no longer an option, so I assume Greg really was serious about the 'or death' thing.

Pears'in'custard for pud then

Lasagne < disappointed vegetarians then>

Messy and hard to eat pasta and sauce really.

Ping is on the ball

As A 'full-time mum' Ping knows how to be organised

Team Ping has worksheets ( scrum pled into bin)

We have some black pudding. Wonder if any peas will be puréed?

Team Lindyhop are struggling already

John could have fucking helped her with the door. Cock.

It seems Michael needs help in chopping up fish.

Arf at ping.

That's one big feckin onion ping

Don't they have minions to prep the veg?

They never get minions, surely?

Because Michael did so well with fish last round. Beginning to suspect Ping is evil.

Mr Gove resents being told what to do.

I've never understood why they have to do all the prep, in any other kitchen the cooks have someone else to prep for them

What was with that fist bump?!

She is the worst kind of evil. Cheerful and efficient evil.

At least to peel the veg, bit pointless wasting time on that.

Team lindyhop are scheduling breaks. Foolhardy.

There is no way in hell those guinea fowl are going to be ready in time

They can have a quick Lindy Hop break once the parsnips are peeled and the Guinea-fowl butchered.

I don't understand why they have to do it all either. They keep going on about professional kitchens, but then the challenges in no way reflect how those work.

They should have carol and Sonia from the caff assisting. Or drunkard Jake from Scarlett's.