Masterchef 4 ways: in which figs are replaced by burnt cavolo nero

[CalamitouslyWrong]

The other thread will be full before the end of tomorrow's programme (and is running very slow anyway), so here's a shiny new one.

The next programme blurb on the bbc website says that failure is no longer an option, so I assume Greg really was serious about the 'or death' thing.

I slipped and thought I broke my
Foot! Just tissue damage tho - so all ok bloody sore though

Where are the scallops and pea purée?

And black pudding

They left them behind last series. There hasn't been a hint of scallop with pea purée this series.

A broken foot sounds dreadful, ohdear!

Ouch, ohdear, mind yourself

The thoughts of pea purree makes me want to hurl

Evening.

Wotchya

Here we go!!
Mass catering to separate the kippers from the turbot

Evening all.

Evening! Missed you all last week!

Wottcha calam

At least greg left that awful bunnet at home today.

Gregg should feel right at home here, me old china, apples & pears, gertcha etc etc etc

He can set up his fruit and veg stall in the market.

Hello all.
Oh look at all the "well I don't mind being team leader"

OO they have feed Ian Beale and he knows his canapés from his cockles

I'm looking forward to this episode of eastenders.

I've never noticed how awful greg's lower teeth are. They're like the comedy teeth in a decrepit cartoon character.

He can have a stand off with Ian Beale.

Microherbs. That's what you need for this kind of catering.

Open lasagne? So that's pasta n sauce then.

What no samphire?

Poached pears. A pudding no one is looking forward to.

Hello people, only switched on, I know Calam, his teeth are horrendous

This might be a good one tonight, love when they get all arsy with each other

I forsee complete utter bollocksy disaster....