Ian Beale - WTAF?

[HokeyCokeyPigInAPokey]

I haven't watched Eastenders for months and months, i just flicked it on to see Ian Beale not looking his best.

What has been going on??

No I didn't watch that.... Was she in something with Martin Cloones maybe?

Who did Pat run over? I'm sure she had a drunk driving thingy.

Can't stand Mrs Brown's Boys.

She knocked down a child (not in the show) about 25yrs ago.

Ah, that's what I was thinking of.

I've just watched this for the first time in about 10 years and my head is spinning.

How many wives has Ian had now? What happened to Jane? Who are Jay's parents? Who is the blonde girl with the baby? Wheres Minty? Who is Janine's husband? What on earth has Kat done to her chest?

Jay's dad died.

I have no idea!

Ian has had 5 wives.

Jane left Ian because she was sick of running his businesses.

Jay came into the show with his grandad who died, his mother was already dead and then his father died so Billy took him on.

The blonde girl is Lola who turned or to be Billy's grandaughter, daughter if the son he didn't know he fathered at 14. His soon died off screen.

Minty left happily ever after with Gary's mum a few years back.

Janine is married to Michael who is Alfie.s cousin and who also fathered Kats baby after they had an off screen affair.

No mention of Kats chest I'm afraid.

Ah, it's all coming back to me now! I really need to stop this now because I didn't intend starting to watch again, it's as much as I can do to keep up with Corrie and DH might divorce me if he finds out

Kat's lip gloss is made of raw plutonium.

Hang on a minute, does that mean Billy is a Great Grandad? When he said that's my granddaughter to Sharon, I assumed he was talking about the baby.

Yes he is a great grand father, Lola had a baby whilst Billy was doing the torch bearer run through Walford, the father had never been revealed.

We think the father is Ben...not sure how that works :o

I think they'll do a Heather and pull a name from the hay to be the father as there was no clue or link between her and Darren.

I think Kat was shaging Janine's new DH.

I thought that pissy but she's been there before so not sure they'd be so obvious. I actually thought it might be one of the Branning brothers.

Did anyone else find it odd the way they were calling 'uncle Michael' infront of Tommy which suggests that they are having Alfie as father but then telling him he was going to see his little sister who is Michaels dd?

Yes, peanut, I was bit puzzled by it all. It's a very puzzling programme.

Oh, here we go, Shirl putting it all together.

Your regular viewers must hate us.

I havent seen it for three years either. I will be back with my annoying questions later.

Lighthouse I haven't watched more than one episode a week, I'd that, for about 4 months.. My mum however is a fanatic so keeps me informed :o

Ha ha I just worked out where I recognised the bridesmaid from .....

The Boots advert!

You know the one with the cold! :)

:o I knew I knew her!

Oh yes i forgot about those i always see her in This Life which was years ago!

Michael was in This Life too !!

I fancied him then..........ok I fancy him now too.