Gather ye for Jesus Weekend Part the Second. ITV1 tonight and Sunday....

[SuePurblybilt]

Will Fat Thor Jesus pack enough Frizz Ease to get through in Minorca?
Will Zoolander Jesus follow his reflection into the sea and drown?
Will Gobby G4 Jesus swim out from the mainland in desperation?

Dirk = Boband Jesus.

Dirk?

Masturbating Jesus is the one who caresses himself all through the songs- Ben, his name was. Is he Mackem?

I had Flirty Jesus for him but I allow it's my opinion only

Who was Dirk? And who is called DIRK?

Yes Earring Jesus!

Earring Jesus has the most beautiful smile. Like this .

That's right Vagaceratops. DD just reminded me too. SO who have we missed?

Yes Ben is Masturbating Mackem Jesus

Dirk was the first to be told.

ooooo, Dawn French tomorrow. We need her to do a DVO to get a nice Jesus, help her forget Nasty Lenny.

Do you think that's why Butlins is in? In case she or Amanda shag one to death?

Dirk-Gently Jesus then? I mean, how many Dirks are there?

I think Earring Jesus sounds like we are tryiong to be PC and not refer to his race. He's clearly Asian Jesus even if it isn't very imaginative.

Dirk = Nondescript Jesus.

Fat Thor Jesus
Mackem Jesus (wanking one)
Oirish Jesus
Did have Glasses Jesus
Bieber Jesus
Earring Jesus
Simba Jesus
Jesus Jesus
Dirk

Understudy - Butlins Jesus

Oh hold on, are we back to Asian Jesus?
We'll have to establish a list tomorrow.

Fat Thor Jesus - love child of James Corden & Justin Lee Collins. He's still cute.

Is the other one David? With the squashy nose I've just been told

That list is still missing one, Sue. WHo was it? CAn;t have been very memorable if none of us know...

David = Beiber Jesus. Looks like he should be presenting Blue Peter.

I dunno. I've lost the will to Jesus

Its Asian /Earring Jesus.

Ok- how about Raging Jesus? It rhymes with Asian, and is ironic because he is so smiley. Unless it makes me sound homophobic, as in "raging homosexual". Gah, it's a minefield.

I think David is Beiber Jesus, Scatter.

No he's there (Asian/Flirty/Earring). It's Forgettable Jesus who is missing.

Dh calls one of the josephjesus because he thinks he looks like lee mead