Shiny new OBEM thread!

[sittinghippo]

Am rather looking forward to seeing the home made bikini for the 'relaxing zen' birth...

Poor Kerry looks knackered

Oh Reality. Can you gently suggest you go with her and make some enquiries. I wasted months, years maybe of dd's life feeling like the biggest most useless failure in the world. It robbed me and dd of too much. And I'm a fucking excellent mother. I can say that now. I really am. Birth schmirth. The method does not make the mother. Would she like anybody to talk to who's been there?? End of an email, won't judge. Would be happy to talk to her.

I love cake too.

Poor girl, that midwife is shit.

Oh why is she scared bless her.
Poor thing.

Its not fair is it?

Ooh, go on Kerry! Don't let that thick blonde MW scare you!

"go'awn go'awn go'awn" she reminds of the housekeeper in Father Ted.

Fuck me she really is trying to put the fear of god into her.

spottydog I was going to say exactly the same

I've had a labour like Kerrys, and a labour like Disneys. And one somewhere in between.

I didn't have much of a say in any of them

But what if she does need forceps more threats oh I really want to shut her up

Yes, because threatening her with forceps will help. Ffs

Love the third couple

women with epidurals should be told 'hold it hold it hold it....' or counted to encourage a long long push

they seem to allow little pushes with breaths between which allows 'slipping back' of babies heads....

Why are all the MWs yelling. FFS, shutup!!!!

spottydog - I agree with you - but it was a lovely birth, who or whatever was responsible

blond mw has turned into Mrs Doyle from Father Ted (gwan gwan gwan) - she is so relentlessly negative 'you don't want forceps [yes, read my fucking notes] so just push him out' Christ

I completely agree spotty - some people get lucky with their labour and birth.

Others, not so much... Just like anything in life really.

Go Kerry!!!!!

That should be a new diet method,

Chocolate/cake/sweets or baby??

Showy can i just say that over the past few months some of the posts that you have wrote have really helped me deal with some of the feelings i had after giving birth to DD. Thanks

I agree spotty, that's why I said the water birth was amazing, not the woman. They are all equally as amazing imo.

God I'd have decked that blong woman - she's appallng!

and why are they all lying on ther backs in this series

Yes. Don't think it is helping to threaten forceps. This MW is a right corker.

Shouty. Ypu don't have to shout. Women in labout aren't deaf.

I kept doing this thing where I'd make horrid pushing noises and clamp my jaw and my MW just gently said things like : relax, don't push, gently etc in a calm voice. No need to SHOUT and treat women like they are badly behaved children.

That poor woman - all those people yelling at her. You need peace and calm from the people around you when you're giving birth, not this circus.

There are ways to tell a woman in pain to stop screaming. I had a midwife like blondie and felt completely humiliated

My mw "bullied" me a little bit. I needed it.

God new couple don't look like an obvious pairing do they?? what's their story?!