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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Child has been missing since 9pm - frantic !

449 replies

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 04:03

I don’t even know if anyone is awake to read this but my neurodivergent 13 yr old son left the house quietly at 9pm and hasn’t come home . I caught him out about something pretty awful he had done, and he denied it and left rather than deal with it / talk about it , he left.

We live in central London and he’s gone without keys , phone or money . After 2 hours driving around looking for him, l reported to the police and they have him now listed as a vulnerable missing person but l’m going out of my mind .

Has any other parent experienced this ? My head is going to a thousand awful scenarios …it’s 4 am now and so cold .

OP posts:
Seabreeze18 · 08/05/2025 06:39

I can’t imagine what u are going through and the lack of sleep means u won’t think straight either! Please update us! Keeping everything crossed!

HollidaySunshine · 08/05/2025 06:40

I would put a message on WhatsApp asking if anyone’s seen him

Longtoe · 08/05/2025 06:41

LillyPJ · 08/05/2025 06:38

It was a just a suggestion using a common phrase, not meant to be taken literally, so you're the one guilty of dramatic hyperbole!

Show quote history

I didn’t think the poster was saying I stalk the op, find out where she is, and kick her!!

All I suggested to op was to put down mumsnet. Tapping away on mumsnet updates isn’t real interaction. Her son will be up or getting up soon. And no doubt terrified. His dad will be with you soon (if not already?). My advice, park the thread

scrivette · 08/05/2025 06:42

We sent the younger DC to school, they were aware of what was going but they needed the stability. We explained to the safeguarding team there what was going on and they said they would let them come out of lessons to chat if need be. So something else for you to consider this morning.

LittleHangleton · 08/05/2025 06:42

I'm a Safeguarding Lead and often children who run away can just turn up for school the next day without going home. Especially neurodivergent children who are used to routine.

Vallmo47 · 08/05/2025 06:42

What an awful night/morning for you OP. Praying he comes back safely very soon.

Longtoe · 08/05/2025 06:43

scrivette · 08/05/2025 06:42

We sent the younger DC to school, they were aware of what was going but they needed the stability. We explained to the safeguarding team there what was going on and they said they would let them come out of lessons to chat if need be. So something else for you to consider this morning.

This

Op brother should definitely go to school

Joystir59 · 08/05/2025 06:43

I hope he's home safe and well very soon OP.

Original poster
MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 06:43

I’m not sure how to add on here really , but l am going for now to go out and search. His dad is here and to the person who said get off and look after his brother..you’ll be reassured to know that he has slept through the night and is just getting up so l wasn’t neglecting him . I will update as soon as l have news but THANK YOU all for holding my fear and panic during the night. I have made a personal resolution to be more supportive and take time to respond to others on Mumsnet as it really helps ! Be back soon with hopefully good news 🤞 holding the faith and so glad it’s light ! ♥️

OP posts:
Lucyintheskywithadiamond · 08/05/2025 06:45

He will be home soon, keep strong. You will find him. Thinking of you.

ResultsMayVary · 08/05/2025 06:48

Hopefully he's just hiding in a friend's bedroom and relieved you've come to take him home. Good luck on your search!

AiryFairyLights · 08/05/2025 06:50

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 06:43

I’m not sure how to add on here really , but l am going for now to go out and search. His dad is here and to the person who said get off and look after his brother..you’ll be reassured to know that he has slept through the night and is just getting up so l wasn’t neglecting him . I will update as soon as l have news but THANK YOU all for holding my fear and panic during the night. I have made a personal resolution to be more supportive and take time to respond to others on Mumsnet as it really helps ! Be back soon with hopefully good news 🤞 holding the faith and so glad it’s light ! ♥️

Good luck @MrsLighthouse hopefully you’ll be back soon with some good news x thinking of you x

EnjoythemoneyJane · 08/05/2025 06:50

Good luck, OP. He’ll turn up this morning. So sorry you’ve had such a terrible, frightening night x

TheGreyQuail · 08/05/2025 06:52

Hand hold from me, just read your OP, hope this is resolved soon and your ds is back home safe. Will be thinking of you and checking for updates today.
All the best to you and your family.💐

DahliaBlooming · 08/05/2025 06:53

Sending you and your family a big un-mumsnetty hug OP. I can't imagine how scared and stressed you all are. Hope he turns up really soon

TemporaryName123 · 08/05/2025 06:54

Thinking of you, I cannot imagine the worry!

Chickydoo · 08/05/2025 06:56

Hope he is found safe and well very soon

olympicsrock · 08/05/2025 06:56

Good luck OP . I ran away as a neurodiverse teenager. Wanted to give my parents a shock as I was angry . I came back after hiding for a bit as I was hungry and cold.

It will be ok …. Handhold xxx

ApolloandDaphne · 08/05/2025 06:56

I hope he is found soon. I can't imagine how worried you must be.

Dweetfidilove · 08/05/2025 06:57

A handhold from me too, OP. 🙏🏾

ThePoshUns · 08/05/2025 06:59

Fingers crossed he is found soon.

LillyPJ · 08/05/2025 07:02

Longtoe · 08/05/2025 06:41

I didn’t think the poster was saying I stalk the op, find out where she is, and kick her!!

All I suggested to op was to put down mumsnet. Tapping away on mumsnet updates isn’t real interaction. Her son will be up or getting up soon. And no doubt terrified. His dad will be with you soon (if not already?). My advice, park the thread

Edited
Show quote history

It's a problem with the written word I guess - you can't always detect tone. Your suggestion to get off MN was perfectly reasonable. It seemed like a rebuke to me. I was obviously wrong.

RinkyDinkDrink · 08/05/2025 07:03

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Perhaps you thought that was helpful. It wasn’t.

Try something like: ‘I hope you’re OK OP, it’s really worrying, but I’m sure he’ll be fine.’

RinkyDinkDrink · 08/05/2025 07:04

Longtoe · 08/05/2025 06:41

I didn’t think the poster was saying I stalk the op, find out where she is, and kick her!!

All I suggested to op was to put down mumsnet. Tapping away on mumsnet updates isn’t real interaction. Her son will be up or getting up soon. And no doubt terrified. His dad will be with you soon (if not already?). My advice, park the thread

Edited
Show quote history

She’s looking for support and human connection in the middle of the night, during a worrying time, when everyone else is asleep. Hope that helps.

RinkyDinkDrink · 08/05/2025 07:05

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 06:43

I’m not sure how to add on here really , but l am going for now to go out and search. His dad is here and to the person who said get off and look after his brother..you’ll be reassured to know that he has slept through the night and is just getting up so l wasn’t neglecting him . I will update as soon as l have news but THANK YOU all for holding my fear and panic during the night. I have made a personal resolution to be more supportive and take time to respond to others on Mumsnet as it really helps ! Be back soon with hopefully good news 🤞 holding the faith and so glad it’s light ! ♥️

Good luck, keeping fingers crossed for you and your son.