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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Child has been missing since 9pm - frantic !

449 replies

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 04:03

I don’t even know if anyone is awake to read this but my neurodivergent 13 yr old son left the house quietly at 9pm and hasn’t come home . I caught him out about something pretty awful he had done, and he denied it and left rather than deal with it / talk about it , he left.

We live in central London and he’s gone without keys , phone or money . After 2 hours driving around looking for him, l reported to the police and they have him now listed as a vulnerable missing person but l’m going out of my mind .

Has any other parent experienced this ? My head is going to a thousand awful scenarios …it’s 4 am now and so cold .

OP posts:
Ruelzdontapplyhere · 08/05/2025 07:08

My niece ran away when she was around the same age. She was hiding out at a older friend's house.
She was found shoplifting a sandwich from Wenzels.
She was missing for 12 days.

K0OLA1D · 08/05/2025 07:08

Good luck op. I am sure you'll find him soon x

Sausagedognamedmash · 08/05/2025 07:10

I have no suggestions but offering a handhold OP. I really hope he turns up soon.

LondonLady1980 · 08/05/2025 07:12

I hope your son is found safe and well and that you have him back home with you soon xx

AndrogynousElf · 08/05/2025 07:13

I hope he’s back soon. You must be exhausted

AnxiousLurker · 08/05/2025 07:13

No relevant experience but didn’t want to read and run. Really hoping your son is found soon OP and all is well. Thinking of you! X

Gundogday · 08/05/2025 07:14

Sending hugs to you all.

Thisismetooaswell · 08/05/2025 07:17

Only just reading this but wanted to send support. I can't imagine the worry you're going through. I have everything crossed you will find him soon

Gonk123 · 08/05/2025 07:20

Hope he turns up soon.
both my boys were runners but thankfully always came back in reasonable time. It’s gut wrenching however long they go for in these circumstances.
best wishes.

saxonyv · 08/05/2025 07:20

A handhold and sending a prayer up X

bigdecisionstomake · 08/05/2025 07:20

Sending support as the mum of a ND DS too - he will turn up, keep strong, we're all thinking of you.

myplace · 08/05/2025 07:21

Hopefully you’ll be back very soon to tell us about his cold and boring night sat in some shrubbery in the near by park. Do the WhatsApp thing- it will mean that all the adults will be aware that he’s not where he should be, and can look out for him. Otherwise they could know where he is and not think to mention it.

Natsku · 08/05/2025 07:24

Really hope he just walks in soon, cold and hungry but otherwise fine.

Zippidydoodah · 08/05/2025 07:24

I have an impulsive teen with adhd who has done a runner a few times, but luckily he’s never gone far and we’ve found him quickly. I’m sincerely hoping you are reunited with yours very soon.

Thinking of you 💐

pollyglot · 08/05/2025 07:25

I'm sorry that you are going through such a worry, OP. I'm sure he'll be back soon.

When my severely asthmatic and anxious son was 16, and after a row on a school night about homework, he went storming off into the night, taking my (old, tired and battered) car, and saying that he was going to drive to our holiday cottage (200 miles away through mountains and dangerous winding roads), and was going to live off the land, catching fish and shooting rabbits.

He turned up a few hours later cradling a tiny baby rabbit. In tears. "Mum, can we fix this baby?" He had injured it on the road, wrapped it up in his jersey, and brought it home - of course he couldn't go to the lake house with such a responsibility. The big tough man had become a small boy. As happens so often. The baby died, and he felt so guilty. It never happened again.

All the best x

Elderflower14 · 08/05/2025 07:25

Sending huge hugs and positive vibes xx

BitOutOfPractice · 08/05/2025 07:26

Oh op I am sending you really strong positive vibes and support that you find him soon. Xxx

heffalumpwoozle · 08/05/2025 07:27

What a horrible, anxious time for you OP. Thinking of you.

Tandora · 08/05/2025 07:27

I have adhd and did this once as a teen. You will find him soon OP xxx

NewAgeNewMe · 08/05/2025 07:27

Lots of love to you. I never had this but a friend did, came back when cold and hungry x

finallyskinny · 08/05/2025 07:27

my ASD cousin did this from a young age (he's now 34) and still does it now! Just wanted to reassure you he always comes home when he's hungry! sending strength and will be thinking about you ❤️

Veryverycalmnow · 08/05/2025 07:28

I hope he is back soon. So scary for you OP. You've had some good advice. Keep going.

ThatCyanCat · 08/05/2025 07:30

Statistically, the overwhelming likelihood is that he's fine and will be back within the next few hours. It must be so worrying and anyone would be in bits, but this sort of thing isn't that uncommon xx

NattyTurtle59 · 08/05/2025 07:32

Sending you all a big hug OP, and hoping your DS is found very soon. 💐

Winter2020 · 08/05/2025 07:33

I hope your son is home very soon.

I just wondered if your flat has somewhere the communal bins are kept as if it was protected from the weather it might be somewhere he would go.

You could also ask any friends to search their children's rooms and not just ask their kids in case they are helping to hide him.