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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

DD 13 has come home with a belly button piercing. Her friend did it on a sleepover!!!

142 replies

PatButchersEarring · 19/02/2023 20:46

I have posted in the support for teenagers thread in this topic re issues we are having with DD.

But this evening, I think I am speechless. She's come home from a friend's where she's had a lovely time for the afternoon. She was wearing a crop top and I looked down- she's had her belly button pierced!!

When asked, she has said that a friend of hers did it (not the one she was with today) a couple of weeks ago on a sleepover. DD is 13, friend is 14.

Piercing looks sore, but not infected as such. I will be taking her to the doctor tomorrow.

I've also called the Dad of the girl in question..he was unaware of what she was doing..although he had bought her the piercing needles, apparently. Long story with this girl and her Dad- she's parented with a very light touch imo. Anyway, thankfully they are moving away very soon, so I'm hoping there will be a natural end to this friendship..but in the interim, DD is livid with me and says I have ruined her friendship by calling this girl's Dad....but I feel he needed to know.

Take me back to the toddler years, please!!

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 19/02/2023 21:22

Teens are proper twats.

Snoken · 19/02/2023 21:23

DaisyDucks · 19/02/2023 21:15

I can’t believe how laid back people are being about a 14 year old mutilating a 13 year olds body.

Oh wow. A bit of a stretch calling it mutilation and completely insensitive to those who have actually been mutilated.

Snoken · 19/02/2023 21:24

DillDanding · 19/02/2023 21:21

I gave extra piercings to lots of my friends (and my mum!) at about this age (ears, not belly buttons). I think a belly button would be a greater risk of infection. Why didn’t she get it done at a proper place?

I think you have to be 15 these days, and we all know teenagers have zero patience.

fooyangcake · 19/02/2023 21:26

DaisyDucks · 19/02/2023 21:15

I can’t believe how laid back people are being about a 14 year old mutilating a 13 year olds body.

FGM is mutilation.

A silly teenage piercing is certainly not mutilation.

Fuctifin0 · 19/02/2023 21:26

At least it wasn't a tattoo and can be removed.
I wouldn't take her to the GP unless it was infected.

PickledOwl · 19/02/2023 21:26

I pierced my own ears at 13. We didn't have any ice cubes though so I had to use 2 frozen fish fingers

DaisyDucks · 19/02/2023 21:27

Snoken · 19/02/2023 21:23

Oh wow. A bit of a stretch calling it mutilation and completely insensitive to those who have actually been mutilated.

Show quote history

I’ll be the one to decide if I’m being insensitive thanks.

Needmorelego · 19/02/2023 21:28

@Twentywisteria good grief....no wonder HIV rates are apparently rising in the 20 something age group.
HIV has never gone away and unfortunately the new generation has apparently become very complacent about it because they think it is easily 'cured'.

DaisyDucks · 19/02/2023 21:28

fooyangcake · 19/02/2023 21:26

FGM is mutilation.

A silly teenage piercing is certainly not mutilation.

Show quote history

Wrong!

www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/mutilation

xprincessxjanetx · 19/02/2023 21:30

JFC there are some proper lax parents on here. If I had pulled a stunt like this my parents would have reacted a hell of a lot worse than OP!

juliettesmother · 19/02/2023 21:30

My (professional) piercing was infected and I was a mess (high fever but shivering). My mum thought I was going to die.

The infection didn't show itself too much (irritation around the piercing) but formed like an egg under the piercing, internally, as it was.

I honestly didn't notice until I was very ill...

Twentywisteria · 19/02/2023 21:30

Needmorelego · 19/02/2023 21:28

@Twentywisteria good grief....no wonder HIV rates are apparently rising in the 20 something age group.
HIV has never gone away and unfortunately the new generation has apparently become very complacent about it because they think it is easily 'cured'.

How many 13 year olds do you know with HIV?

Bit of a stretch to use STI stats for people in their early 20s - i.e. the peak of sexual activity 🙄 (and in the context of the increasing popularity of chemsex).

juliettesmother · 19/02/2023 21:30

So yes, medical attention is definitely required to check up on her

Snoken · 19/02/2023 21:31

DaisyDucks · 19/02/2023 21:27

I’ll be the one to decide if I’m being insensitive thanks.

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No I’m pretty sure others can decide if you are insensitive too. Especially those who have been mutilated. You can’t just blurt out whatever you like and decide you are not being insensitive.

Original poster
PatButchersEarring · 19/02/2023 21:31

Aquamarine1029 · 19/02/2023 21:22

Teens are proper twats.

Absolutely!

OP posts:
slamfightbrightlight · 19/02/2023 21:32

I’m not sure about GP but I would consider taking her to a proper piercing studio to have it looked over and if necessary removed under more sanitary conditions.

quietnightmare · 19/02/2023 21:32

Is she keeping it?

Tallulasdancingshoes · 19/02/2023 21:32

I actually would take her to the doctor, particularly as it looks sore and scabby. It might be infected. You don’t want it getting worse or risking something really nasty like sepsis.

Elnetthairnet · 19/02/2023 21:32

Oh god chill out. If it’s not obviously really infected it doesn’t need a doctor, just give it a clean and put some antiseptic on. Taking her for a telling off by the doctor is a total and utter waste of a GP’s time. Sounds like they used a clean piercing needle, it’s not exactly difficult to do it, and she’s 13 -she’s old enough to decide for herself if she wants to stick holes in herself.

userxx · 19/02/2023 21:32

Snoken · 19/02/2023 21:20

Meh…

I’m in my forties and had my belly button pierced by my friends brother when I was 14 using a needle and ice cube. I still have the hole but I don’t put anything in it anymore. It’s a totally normal thing for teenagers to do. I also had my nose pierced at a funfair at 13, but that hole has closed up.

Just clean it now with antiseptic and make sure she cleans it morning and night for the next 6 weeks.

Yeah, I used a normal ear piercing gun, it hurt life fuck! Think I was 15 and so proud of it.

DaisyDucks · 19/02/2023 21:32

Snoken · 19/02/2023 21:31

No I’m pretty sure others can decide if you are insensitive too. Especially those who have been mutilated. You can’t just blurt out whatever you like and decide you are not being insensitive.

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Nope, they can’t 😀

Megapint · 19/02/2023 21:35

Pretty standard teenage thing isn't it?. Most people I know got at least 1 piercing from a friend when we were young. I still have a tiny scar from a 'tattoo ' I did myself with a needle (sterilized with a lighter!) & ink from the art room in school. Could be worse it could have been a nose or lip.

Original poster
PatButchersEarring · 19/02/2023 21:35

juliettesmother · 19/02/2023 21:30

So yes, medical attention is definitely required to check up on her

Thank you. That has made my mind up. I will call the doctor tomorrow for advice.

OP posts:
Needmorelego · 19/02/2023 21:37

@Twentywisteria a lot of 13 year old could have been born HIV+ as it can be passed on in-utero.

Savoretti · 19/02/2023 21:38

Go to a piercing place and get the cleaning spray they recommend. My piercings always get a little infected before they heal properly - I just clean them with dilute dettol a couple times a day til it settles down.