Allowing a small bottle of alcohol at 15

[jacspatoutthecat]

My DD is almost 15 and lots if her friends are experimenting with drink etc and some often go down the beach till the early hours and get the older kids to buy their drinks. My DD would like to go to the beach this evening from about 4pm and be picked up about 8pm. It is just her and 2 friends. They are adamant they are not meeting anyone else so most of the others don't come out till about 8pm!!! Both the other girls parents are allowing them one bottle of hooch. Thing is if I say no she will probably find a way of buying it or getting it without my knowledge, I think I would rather provide her with one small bottle than say no and then she ends up drinking someone elses!!!! When I think about what I did at 15 I was experimenting with drink and smoking but behind my parents back so I am glad she asked my permission rather than just going out and drinking secretly!!! Would you buy her a bottle or just say no??

I just think that providing it to take out is saying 'I approve of underage drinking in public at 14/15' and I don't

If it's not something you want them to do then why make it easier and make it look like you approve if you don't. I think I would be using that request to say 'no for these reasons..'

If they then still chose to make a stupid decision then that would be their fault and not mine. I wouldn't make threats to punish them if I found out but I would hope they make a good decision and I would not provide support for a bad one.

some people are so precious

@neroforte

some people are so precious

What can that mean, in the context of this thread?

@BigSandyBalls2015

We did when our DDs were that age .... the kids with parents who said no were seen outside the local londis asking strange men to buy them booze. I know what I’d prefer!

Or, they might not drink? No need for that concern where I live though. The local shop sells booze to teens. Another parent asked me not to report the shop 🙄 she's a teacher. Nice.

@neroforte

some people are so precious

I'm not precious but the health and well-being of my children is. I must have done something right as I have one who doesn't drink at all and the other if he's starting to experiment then its been in the last fortnight since he has resumed his social life. No big deal. He can buy it himself in a few weeks.

I was allowed to try alcohol from about 12, as in half a measure of pimms. Grew up in pubs so was well aware of alcohol dangers
Stuff like hooch from age about 14/15 but always at home and never more than one bottle
It worked for me - I spotted a boyfriend had an alcohol issue and dumped him swiftly, and at 36 I barely drink. Not unusual for me to go a year without drinking

Not at 14, no. I also wouldn't want her hanging around with kids whose parents thought it was okay to be out drinking at midnight. My nearly 16 year old has a beer if we are having a bbq etc but that's it

I wouldn't have wanted mine out at midnight at 14!
Where has that come from though since the OP said her Dd was going out from 4 until 8?

I used to feel exactly like you do op. Did what you've done. Could have written your posts. Including the laughing emojis. Still think it's probably ok for most teens. They will follow the path of drinking alcohol sensibly and having fun at parties etc as they get older.

The problem is you don't know now what may happen in the future. How can anyone.

On Saturday night dd19 lost control of his car after getting in it drunk. He's ok. But is an alcoholic. At 19.

Oh how I wish I hadn't given him that Fosters and thought he was just being a normal teen 'fitting in' at 14/15 years old.

We're now looking at dropping out of uni and rehab. At 19. 🙁

I have a 13 yr old dd. Who right now hates the thought of alcohol and has no interest in it. And I won't be buying it for her when she does.

You live and learn.

@Tarapinn, I'm so sorry. I'm glad that your ds is ok, and hope that the accident will prompt him to get help.