The majority of dds friends are either gay, bi, pan or trans

[Mrschickpeabody]

She insists she’s ‘straight’. We’ve assured her we’d have no problem at all if she wasn’t as long as she’s happy. Every day someone in her friendship circle comes out as pan or decides they’re bi and not gay. One friend has just realised she is trans and has a new name and is referred to as a he now. They are about to go into year 9 so she 13-14. Is this remotely ‘normal’.

It's a fad. The worst thing in the world for a teen to be right now is straight and white. If they can't identify out of whiteness they'll identify into anything else.

This.

It's just the 2020 version of punk/emo. Provided they stay away from the blockers and the binders, it will just be a very short lived phase. Most of them will be married to blokes and have a couple of kids 20 years from now.

I hate it when someone says "its just a phase", and I'm a bog standard hetero. I'm wondering if my neice is experimenting because her sister has decided to identify as male, so she has done the same. Fortunately my head won't explode because we aren't close.
My child came out as gay when they were 13, they have been bullied ever since and it has affected their mh too, so i can't believe its a "phase".

I am 76. No one ‘identified’ as anything when I was a teenager.
In my 20s I had a couple of gay man friends and I knew a couple of gay women when I was in my 50s but suddenly it seemed as though a bandwagon rolled up and all the kids jumped on. It is great that sexuality in all its shades is now acceptable but I do get a feeling that some younger teens feel embarrassed about being straight these days. No doubt time will tell.

@SirSamuelVimesBlackboardMonito

It's a fad. The worst thing in the world for a teen to be right now is straight and white. If they can't identify out of whiteness they'll identify into anything else.

Twenty quid that in twenty years there's maybe one of them who is actually gay.

Maybe wherever your kids go to school, but in the real world there are plenty of teenagers who face racist and homophobic abuse.

If there are some kids who think they're lgbt or whatever because they want to "fit in", then it's miles better than anyone who is even suspected of being gay getting mercilessly bullied. Which still happens, by the way.

Expect they are all straight but like to be fashionable lol It's not cool to be normal these days!

@nicky7654

Expect they are all straight but like to be fashionable lol It's not cool to be normal these days!

Yeah, everyone acting like those abnormal gays. 🙄

@nicky7654

Expect they are all straight but like to be fashionable lol It's not cool to be normal these days!

Exactly this. Attention at any cost.

Dsd told us age 13 she was bi. She's 16 now, totally straight and mortified she ever said that. She was just trying to fit in /get noticed.

When my daughter was in year 9 (4 years ago), she was in a very similar circle of friends. Four of the girls came out and got into couples with eachother; four years on 3 of these girls are now with boys. There are another two who changed gender at around that time (and are still known as their chosen genders).

My daughter has always been very girly, and has been boy mad since she hit puberty. However, she is not drawn to the popular or conventional crowds - she prefers people that she finds interesting.

Teenagers have always been experimental and hope to shock their parents.

What is pan?

BTW my 9yo DD has a friend, same age who wants to change sex from female to male. This seems young to me but not my business.

Pan is what has been invented to appease the gender cult. Because "bisexual" denotes two sexes, which is now wrong, and a relic of racist colonial thinking. Apparently there are about 80 million genders, and pansexuals are attracted to any & all of them.

@Bluewavescrashing

BTW my 9yo DD has a friend, same age who wants to change sex from female to male. This seems young to me but not my business.

Be on the lookout. Social contagion is a very real thing. Look into rapid onset gender dysphoria.

It’s a “cool” bandwagon to ride on. See where they all are in 10 years time!

Pan is what has been invented to appease the gender cult. Because "bisexual" denotes two sexes, which is now wrong, and a relic of racist colonial thinking. Apparently there are about 80 million genders, and pansexuals are attracted to any & all of them.

Alrighty then... Biology graduate here, trying very hard to be understanding but Wtf?!

Honestly, blue, if you're trying to come at this from the point of view of biological science & reality, you aren't going to get far!

Biological sex isn't real, apparently. It's assigned at birth, not observed, and who cares about genitalia anyway, genital preferences are transphobic. Apparently. Your gender is about who you really are, it's about speaking your truth and dying your hair blue and, funnily enough, reinforcement of sexist stereotypes that keep women quiet and nice and let men do whatever they want, including keeping the beard and the penis but being a lesbian now. And it's only western civilization that makes you think there's just two sexes, really sex is a spectrum. Though somehow the humans who make the large gametes still end up getting screwed.

Bluewavescrashing
Oh yes...
Some MP's can even look into your eyes and see your gendered soul (Layla Moran if you're curious)

Pan is what has been invented to appease the gender cult. Because "bisexual" denotes two sexes, which is now wrong, and a relic of racist colonial thinking. Apparently there are about 80 million genders, and pansexuals are attracted to any & all of them.

However, 'pansexual' has fallen out of favour in some parts apparently because it emphasises the fact that transpeople are not in fact the opposite sex and excludes them from bisexuality. Or something. No idea what has replaced it now.

Pan is when someone's gender isn't a factor in whether you are attracted to someone, whereas a bisexual might be attracted to people of various genders, but gender is a factor. So I would describe myself as bi rather than pan, because I've had periods of only.being attracted to men, or of mostly being attracted to women, and femininity really doesn't do it for me. Whereas I have a pan relative who genuinely doesn't care about gender in the slightest - looking at her relationships, she clearly has a type, but the qualities that make up that type don't include gender.

DD is in a similar group. However she is bored to tears with the constant conversation about how they identify today, it’s all about them and how they feel. Not about relationships or makeup or fashion or anything else, just the label that fits.

Sounds rather dull!

@VirginiaWolverine

Pan is when someone's gender isn't a factor in whether you are attracted to someone, whereas a bisexual might be attracted to people of various genders, but gender is a factor. So I would describe myself as bi rather than pan, because I've had periods of only.being attracted to men, or of mostly being attracted to women, and femininity really doesn't do it for me. Whereas I have a pan relative who genuinely doesn't care about gender in the slightest - looking at her relationships, she clearly has a type, but the qualities that make up that type don't include gender.

I genuinely don't understand this. Can you define gender please, as you intend for it to be read in that post?

I'm all for feminism. Screw the patriarchy etc. But whaaaaaat?

They're just shagging more than the other kids, is all.

DD is in a similar group. However she is bored to tears with the constant conversation about how they identify today, it’s all about them and how they feel. Not about relationships or makeup or fashion or anything else, just the label that fits.Sounds rather dull!

Yeah. Getting wasted would be more fun (sorry).

Me, me, me is very teenage-typical. Look at Dawson's Creek. I loved the angst as a late 90s / early 2000s teen 😁

@Bluewavescrashing

I'm all for feminism. Screw the patriarchy etc. But whaaaaaat?

Blue this is nothing to do with feminism. Have a read of this thread, it might be an eye opener.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3145470-Break-it-down-for-me