My 12yo DS wants me to ask you all?!

[Skinimum]

Do you allow your 12+ yo DS and DD to have their phones / devices in their rooms at night?

Do you allow your 13+ yo DS and DD to have their phones / devices in their rooms at night!

yes with parental controls on router

No electricals in bedrooms. End of.

Same rule for us and dc.

No tv, no phones, no iPads in rooms.

Mine are 13 and 15 and use their phones as alarms...

They are reasonable about phone use at bedtime though DD sometimes calls her boyfriend before going to sleep. I'd only remove the phones if they caused a problem. Obviously been lucky, as both kids are fairly responsible.

Just read page one to ds - he just shook his head and walked off!

A question for your DS: so, your mum is being really unreasonable right? Because you can be trusted to go to bed at a sensible time not stay on your phone all night, and not to look at dodgy stuff, and she's just trying to be controlling? So... If you are not going to be using it because you'll be asleep anyway, why do you need your phone in your room?

Sorry, OP's DS- it's not pushy, it's sensible! Because to be honest, if you planned to be sensible and trustworthy with it, you wouldn't be so outraged that you aren't allowed it!

13 year old now, and was also no at 12.

YT is a bit more troublesome. Yes they have free reign, but I do random spot checks and if I see anything I don't like, device is removed swiftly for varying lengths of time.

People saying no to you tube, if you have restrictions on router etc why not? Dd1 really really into art she'all use you tube as a way to get hints and tips to improve her drawing/painting or sometimes it's to watch a video how to do a certain hairstyle/plait etc?

Nope. Phone & tablet are charged downstairs overnight.

No TV in bedrooms either.

Plenty of books though!

skin - I have disabled the internet search capability on dd's iPod and phone.

If she wants to go on YouTube then I monitor it very carefully and she's only allowed on it in the kitchen when I am nearby.

I'm a primary school teacher and am only too aware of the pitfalls of allowing some children unlimited and unsupervised access to social media, messages, Internet etc.

DS is 12 tomorrow. No phone and new tablet (birthday present) are allowed in bedroom at night. In fact at present, unless doing homework, he is not allowed access to either after 8pm on a weekday, so he has plenty of screen free time before bed.

Maybe I should practise what I preach

DS just cracked me up and said "turn it off and ignore them because they are annoying!!" He asked me to ask cos he was convinced you'd all be more relaxed!

According to him 'everyone' else is allowed their devices in their rooms!!

Thanks all, point proven!

Ps what's your 12yo (Yr7) bedtime?

DS 13 hands it over 830. He also thinks I am unreasonable. But I'm on his side he will thank me one day

He needs to be in bed by 930 latest. This will be a battle tonight.

12+ no.

15+ yes but wifi is off from 10pm

My 12 year old does not have a phone and when he does (maybe next year) he won't be allowed. Having a phone in the room is not healthy,,,,

No. Up till 17 both my sons had all devices removed at bed time during the week. Neither had any self control and would have been on them most of the night.
They are now in their 20's and despite needing to be up for work they will be online or gaming till the early hours. Seems crazy to me but not my problem any more.

Hello to your 12 year old DS
Hi, this probably isn't the right answer you're looking for but no, I don't allow it.
I have a 13 year old who has his own phone, but all electrical devices are left downstairs to charge on an evening and not allowed in the bedrooms.
Bedrooms are a place for relaxing (reading, writing, doing jigsaws, actual sleeping when it's bedtime ...
Can go on phones during the day, but once it's bedtime they stay downstairs.

I'm behind on this thread, sorry, just seen your update.

Bedtime for 9 year old is 9 pm on school nights...as in lights off, reading before this.

We like DS, Y7 to be in bed by 9 and lights off at 9.30. He takes ages to get to sleep, sometimes still awake when we go to bed. Has to be up at 6.30 and has long school days as has hour long commute each way

Mine are 14 and 17.

Once you let them have a phone, you've already opened Pandora's box. Make ALL the necessary settings (including Google+) child-safe and talk in detail about safety and avoiding porn which is an abomination and ruining children's lives.

But if you're giving them the phone why does it matter if they have it in their room after they go to bed?! Yes, set a time when it should go off so they can sleep for sure, but I'm not sure what you're hoping to avoid by having them give it up overnight.

However if my child was suffering bullying I might restrict it then in order to give them a break and talk to them about deleting certain Snapchat or WhatsApp groups where negative things are being said.

My 11 year old doesn't have any devices yet. He won't get his own until he's 14 and even then no devices in bedrooms until 16 and never (including myself and DH) at the dining table, in the car or in company. Have the rules, not the rows 👍🏻

Yes, 15 year old, but he's pretty relaxed and goes to sleep fairly promptly after going to bed, so not really tempted to use it. (And we live in a small flat so very easy for me to check.)

Dc1 at 12 was in bed by 8.30/9.00pm.
Dc2 is now 12 and is in bed at 8.30 on the dot, sometimes earlier (her choice as she feels tired).

Now skini can I guess your ds will find that awful too?

DS14 has his phone, but wifi password is changed at 10pm. Much easier than asking wrestling devices off him

My yr7 DS will be 12 in a weeks time. Absolutely no phone or gadgets in his bedroom at all! And he goes to bed at 9, and reads for 20 mins before sleep. He is up before 7 and walks about 3 miles a day to and from school.