prepare to be shocked;but at this moment in time, i wish i could throw my teenage dd out , ive reached breaking point.:-(

[canttakeanymore]

this is long, im afraid.
im a regular with a namechange.
my eldest daughter has been a handful since she was 18 months old, she started having violent rages which have just got worse and worse.
when her brother was born, she took her rages out on him and i never dared leave her alone with him.
by the time she was 9, her behaviour was so bad that she punched me in the tummy when i was 9 months preg with ds2, just because i told her off for hitting her brother.
her father and i seperated when she was a baby and he has been no help, he always made it clear that he couldnt care less how she behaved in my house.
the last couple of years have been really bad, the trouble is, when shes calm, she can be lovely, and also puts forward a very convincing act of being a little angel, so previous attempts to seek help have fallen flat on the ground as no one beleives that anything is wrong.
she will usually errupt into a rage because shes told she cant have/do something, she will attack my other children, throwing things at them, shes smashed her bedroom door on the inside and chunks are missing from the walls.
the last time she went beserk, she went to a friends and told them i hit her!!!! the mother threatened to phone social services, it took a while for me to convince her otherwidse and im sure she thinks im cruel to dd.
i cant touch dd otherwise she screams child abuse.
this week shes grounded as she had an explosion a few days ago, i also took her phone away from her.
today she started kicking off demanding her phone back, i ignored her and she went beserk, she terrified 2 year old dd, and i dread to think what my neighbours must think.
she smashed her room up, then stormed off to her friends, i was powerless to stop her, shes probally down there now telling lies that i abuse her....i cant stop crying..where did i go wrong...ive even considered suicide because i seem to be in a no win situation..today is the final straw, i just want her out of my house, i refuse to let her terrorise my other children, but shes ponly 15, so i cant make her leave, but if i could i would....

dd was not amused, especially when she read the bit about me wanting to throw her out..theres been a lot of shouting since.
i had the scan, but tbh i found it horrible, i was virtually hyperventilating inside that scanner.
im still feeling very dow n and feel that i am bei ng completely ignored on mn(not by you guys), o posted threads which were quite serious which no one or only about 2 people responded too, im beginning to wonder if ive done something to upset the mumsnetters on here

I don't think so spacey. I think there are so many people on mn now that a thread can disappear in seconds from the active convos page. I'm used to the fact nowadays that you have to bump your threads yourself a bit before anyone notices.

Look at it the other way, it moves so fast that by the time you've posted something can have gone from the top to the bottom before you've even seen it!

At least your scan is over now. As for your DD I am sorry her reading your posts has caused trouble but she knows now, nothing you can do about it so she will have to realise how serious her behaviour is.

Are you planning to do anything about your feelings of depression? If it were me I would be straight off to the doctors for some support. Why soldier on when help is available?

well i bumped them several times but..well..never mind..im going to ring the gp tomorrow and mzake an appt, i know i need to get some help.
yes im glad the mri is over as i was dreading it, i now have the tests in 2 weeks which are really horrible but will give answers.

Well I am sure you haven't done anything to upset people anyway - well if you have I'm not aware of it!

Glad you're going to the docs. Incidentally I have been taking Kalms three times a day and one St Johns Wort every day and they are working really well for me. They make me a little forgetful but I am quite relaxed and not at all anxious. And the good thing is that they are all natural stuff. I sleep very well on them too.

Speaking of which I'm afraid I must be off to bed. Don't think I'm ignoring you, I'll be back tomorrow! Good night xx

night
x

Hi spacey im glad every thing went ok for you today and im pleased your going to the doctors. At least your dd knows exactly how you feel now she probably didnt like what she read but the truth hearts and its never nice reading about your self maybe it will make her think you never know stranger things have happened

spacey, I am glad you are going to the drs too
I looked for your employment threads and couldn't find them(????!!!) Can you do a link?
I agree with others that these threads move so quickly its not personal when a post gets missed.
Re dd reading posts; it amazes me how affronted teenagers can be when presented with facts re their behaviour.

Take care Spacey.

How is everyone else doing?

Anorak I swear by st john's! brill stuff only get them on prescription in Ireland, natures prozac they call it and ginseng is real energy booster

Spacey I have posted and been ignored (well i thought) if I use work name I'm answered! I really think some people think we're trouble?!(regular posters to this thread and simular) Bit gobby and opinionated?! Whatever gave them that idea????????

WE ARE THE MOTHERS!

My dd was brought home at 5.30 this morning in tears after being half strangled by this so called 21yr old friend he is now in custody. Had a long chat with dd it seems she feels sorry for him and just cant help being drawn to him. Hopefully he will be locked up again and dd wont have to worry about him

oh runkid, I am so sorry. How worrying. I will CAT you {{{}}}

i think my problem is because im down, im taking things to heart that wouldnt normally bother me at all.
runkid,, the poor little thing, is she ok?
are the police going to press charges.

Spacey, I think when anyone is down lots of things get out of perspective. Don't be hard on yourself

i know, its daft, silly things are really upsetting me.
am going to phone docs now.

right, just phoned docs, have appt booked for monday 16th.

well done spacey

Just caught up with this thread as I've been offline this week. Spacey I'm so sorry you're feeling awful, and I feel bad that your other threads went unnoticed - if I'd been around I would've replied, honestly.

I can identify with the way you're feeling at the moment - well done for making that doc's appointment, I know how hard it is (still not managed to make an appt myself) especially when you move to a new area and have to face a new doctor

yes arrested and charged its a sad situation all round as this lad has had a terrible life himself but thats another story

runkid-

Spacey well done! mole hi Runkid dont be blue? look at your beautiful little boy

MMAD yes ds helps me get through a lot coulndnt have done it without him. Hows things with you moley

dd has got herself 2 jobs!
one baby sitting and the other working in the local shop, am a bit but it will do her good, sadly thgough i think shes going to fail her gcses if she doesnt do some revisuon, ive seen no evedence of school work for a while now.

Good for her getting a job two even.She still may pass exams keep the faith.

apologies for my awaful spelling, my keyboard has worn away!

Spacy thats fantastic news!!! I know exams are a huge pressure for parents as well as kids but if it helps my dd totally screwed up her final year! but went back into education when she was 19 and has achieved so much since then. I personally think that if they can get and keep a job thats the first step to independence so well done spacey's dd

Hi all hows it all going? I am worn out dd has been home around one night in two weeks and back in court in two weeks also