All is not lost here.
For the little I know, Mears' DS is tacitly asking for help and support, rather more than the average teenager might. That to me indicates a better than expected relationship. I'd seize the opportunity to both strengthen this bond, and move from governor to mentor, ie someone who helps, not exercise power for slefish ends.
"My house - my rules".
Love it.
When we married I owned the house, and am considerably larger and stronger than my wife.
Anyone care to consider me as having the right to such power ?
Janh I don't have a daughter, if I did I would take a much harder line. She would be left under no doubt that her sex life was expected to happen in our house under appropriate degrees of protection.
Having large scary dad a few metres away might be quite comforting. And I'd see it as a filter for lesser boys who wouldn't be able to cope with that :)
The girls I've dated over the years mostly did not regard the "help" from their parents very highly.
Is that not a representative sample ?
I must say I don't yet quite understand the position that teenagers are untrustworthy, devious etc.
Once you start laying down rules based upon your power, merely to reduce squeamishness over sex, you've left behind parental care, and in my ethical framework, you don't have any duty to be truthful to the opposition if they're acting for their good not yours.
Note the word "opposition", at 16, the word "enemy" would have fitted my models rather better.
If I treated any adult with the disrespect shown by "my house, my rules", I'd expect them to use guile and cunning to outwit me, frankly at 16 my boys will probably be bigger than me, certainly smarter. If my sons did not respond to such tyrranny with a sophisticated web of disinformation, covert action and at least a bit of nose to nose hostility, I personally would regard myself as a failed faither.
Also it doesn't affect the outcome. They're sleeping together, or not, you don't get a say. Your options are solely in the domains of risk mitigation and bloody minded interference.
Like all parents I have fears for my kids. In my ideal world, they'd emerge from their PhDs in their mid 20s with perhaps one relationship. That's not going to happen.
Actually the education thing is worth looking at as well. Sex is not very time consuming, even when donw well. A boy who is not wasting time chasing after girls, may spend more time on school work, and of course the risks from sex are far easier to manage than those from drugs, motorbikes, drink etc which 16 yo boys do because they can't get sex.
Also because you can choose to be an ally in his "social" life, your entreaties to work well at school will be taken more seriously (sometimes).
Statements about a "good life" by someone who is seen as screwing up your sex life at 16 are less likely to be taken as the advice of a friend, and risk being seen as yet another ego based interference with their lives.