Boys in dresses. Yes or no?

[spidermama]

My DS (3.5) loves dresses and butterfly tops and glittery sparkley fairy type stuff. I have no objection. I even bought him a couple of dresses of his own to stop him raiding long-sufferine DD's wardrobe. My only slight worry is teasing from other kids. He wants to wear a dress to pre-school today. What do you think?

I think Enid is right to be honest even tho I don't really agree. I know my dp would be aghast.
Ds loves pink sparkly shoes from the dressing up and no one bats an eyelid, he wanted to wear them home y'day but they are hell to walk in (just like the real deal!)

BUT WHY IS IT "NOT RIGHT"

Little girls like dressing up too, but I wouldn't let mine go to pre-school dressed in her dragon costume or as Bob the Builder, because there is a time and place for dressing up. She knows that she has to go to school in "normal" (for want of a better word) clothes, because that is what the staff and other children expect.

Who's wrong. The dress wearing boys or the teasers? How long will we let predjudice reign over our lovely little boys. If you could see him in his dresses you'd melt I swear.

why is it not right?

I blame years of stereotyping meself . sorry.

Because people might think he's a pouff, shock horror.

I don't think it would be unreasonable Spidermama, for you to point out to your ds that, although he is a boy and enjoys wearing dresses, it isn't in fact the norm for boys and men to wear dresses in public. I am not saying that is right or wrong, but he sounds like a bright little boy and I would consider it my duty as a parent to point this out to my son, just as I consider it my duty to make him wash his hands or use a knife and fork properly. Your son, knowingly or totherwise, looks to you to teach him the way society works.

If its normal find a clothes shop where there are dresses with the boys clothes

yes, blu, and that's PEOPLE ... NOT other children, but their parents

And why will the fathers be shocked/ disapproving? Is it relecting badly on their own masculinity?

come on elsmommy... i am waiting for your reasons why it is "not right"

Of course he's not wrong, of course it's everyone else's attitude - and in an ideal world we could all wear what we want, when we want. But this isn't an ideal world, even for a three year old. We all have conventions that we have to conform to, and rightly or wrongly, we all have to suffer sometimes if we chose to flout those conventions. Sorry, but that's life - and it does start as early as three.

Absolutely lonleymum which is why I have gone to great pains to point this out to him. He's fully aware of the issues and takes an informed decision.

yes agree Lonely mum

does anyone here honestly believe that adults would believe a 3 yr old wearing a dress was homosexual?

that's the most ridiculous thing i have heard on here for a long time

and will someone PLEASE tell me why it is "not right" for a boy to wear a dress

I expect Spiderboy has noticed that the men he has seen for 3 years wear suits, or trousers which show the top of their bottoms, or if they are proper grown-up men, replica football shirts.

Fantasy dressing or what?

I dunno about dp puddle, he can't explain either

thats a very good point Starlover.Little boys used to be dressed in dresses till they were about 3/4 up till quite recently didnt they? Not sure when that was fazed out (poss about ww1??). Didnt seem to ahve done them any harm either. Maybe we should bring it back in Save loads on buying new clothees for the next child if its of the opposite sex wouldnt it???

sorry but he cant take an informed decision at 3.

didnt do them any harm

of course men were brilliant in victorian times werent they, silly me I forgot that

He's DRESSING UP! He's not making a lifestyle choice at 3 or sending out covert messages about his future sexuality. He's experimenting, like three year old do.

i think you will find a dress for boys here

No, it's not 'normal' to find boys dresses in shops, but because something isn't 'usual', why does that make it a PROBLEM?

I wonder what brave woman first decided not to conform and fling away the whalebone corset which was causing her to faint. Bonnets off to her. She's worth a hundred of any meek conformist!

I would have no problem with letting a boy wear dresses and would not expect pre-school staff to allow any teasing - although I wouldn't expect any from pre-schoolers anyhow.

It is a shame to curtail self expression in tiny ones IMO! He sounds like a great kid