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Original poster

So this whole minge topiary business...

180 replies

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 07/04/2009 13:56

Does everyone do it these days?
Being an unreconstructed 80s feminist, I am a bit bemused by the fact that it seems to be taken for granted that everyone routinely waxes their fanjo.
Removing, between May and October, any hair that was visible between knicker elastic and knees, counted as perfectly acceptable pubic grooming until the mid-Nineties at least.
But now, apparently you need to look like a prepubescent child to be appropriately groomed.
Is this another of the long line of 21st-century battles feminism has lost?
Or am I the one that's losing it?

OP posts:
Kathyis6incheshigh · 08/04/2009 16:44

Here here LadyGlencora.

I don't shave my minge either.

stitchtime · 08/04/2009 16:46

ladyglen, to me, waxing is simply part of grooming, and i did it way back when as well. but, then i grew up in the middle east, and it is quite normal to do so there.
however, your most recent post, i completely agree with you there. the plastication of women, and always having ot look perfect is scandalous.

IcantbelieveImForty · 08/04/2009 16:51

..in my day (eek!) boys were grateful to have a snog with a girl, let alone be particular about her pubic hair. How ridiculous, what are the men/boys doing for the girls ?

paolosgirl · 08/04/2009 17:12

Men and boys are doing nothing - and this power that they seem to have over women when it comes to how they should look, with young women and girls seemingly nothing more than willing, silent playmates makes me so sad.

I think it's a reflection of the sexualistion of society, and women in particular, that we have become so obsessed with sex in some way - how we look, how good it is, how often we get it. Add to that the obsession we have with image, celebrity and looks and the lack of emphasis placed on education and ability, and it's no wonder that girls and women are placed under this tremendous pressure to look good constantly.

With so much talk of Brazilians, Hollywoods etc etc waxing appears to have become the norm - and it's NOT! Why on earth are we women buying into the notion that constant waxing and exfoliating our labias is something to aspire to?

Spidermama · 08/04/2009 18:01

Well said ladyglen. So true.

elsiepiddock · 08/04/2009 18:05

Well I'm a huge brazilian fan, but my dh trims his and keeps it tidy too!

Claire236 · 08/04/2009 18:51

I have a Hollywood because I like it. It's nothing to do with feminism or anything else. My previous workplace tried to force me out of my job when I was on maternity leave, that's a feminist issue not how much pubic hair grown women choose to have.

paolosgirl · 08/04/2009 19:07

What is it you like about pulling the hair out of it's roots from your labia, exfoliating skin that is not designed to see an exfoliator, having itchy regrowth after 2 weeks and short stubby hairs for about 3 weeks until it's long enough to pay good money for another woman to pull yet more hair out of your labia?

I'm genuinely puzzled as to what reason would be good enough to make a sane, intelligent woman want to do that to herself every 5 or 6 weeks.

IcantbelieveImForty · 08/04/2009 19:10

..but labia lips etc are ugly, why would you want to expose them ? A trim maybe, but the whole lot off...yuk

Original poster
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 08/04/2009 19:13

Claire you are utterly right that your employer trying to force you out of a job while on maternity leave is a feminist issue.
But the stuff about body image is also a feminist issue. One doesn't exclude the other.

OP posts:
paolosgirl · 08/04/2009 19:18

Exactly, LadyGlen. Why get so up in arms about the feminist issues surrounding enforced redundancy whilst on mat leave when you're happy to buy into the oversexualised body image that the media in it's widest sense want you to succumb to?

MagNacarta · 08/04/2009 19:32

I tried and liked it, but hated hated hated the stubble that came through a day or two later, so I'm interested in other methods.

Too shy to have it done professionally and can't imagine waxing myself, so what is the best way to avoid the stubble?

stitchtime · 08/04/2009 20:00

waxing is the only way to avoid the stubble

mrsmaidamess · 08/04/2009 20:02

Only shave downwards.

Jenbot · 09/04/2009 10:13

I remember reading a novel where in one scene a man on the beach saw a woman with a pubic hair coming out of the side of her bikini and was transfixed with lust and desire. How dated, eh?
If it had been written now, he'd probably have posted a photo of the 'minger' onto youtube or something, to laugh at with his friends.

EffiePerine · 09/04/2009 10:57

am pottering about the boards this morning being Educated

Do teenagers really feel pressure to remove the whole lot? I had no idea waxing had become so essential (then again I had never waxed my eyebrows till a couple of years ago and am now a convert).

BonsoirAnna · 09/04/2009 11:03

What is the difference between removing underarm hair and pubic hair? When I was a teenager I lived in a country where many women didn't remove underarm hair and, indeed, to do so was frowned upon by many older women - much as the removal of pubic hair is being frowned upon by some posters on this thread, and all sorts of silly reasons are being put forward to justify their conservative position.

Waxing/sugaring of pubic hair (and other hair) has gone on for centuries - it is common in some societies, uncommon in others. Au naturel is often ugly and unhygienic.

Cailleachna · 09/04/2009 11:07

"..but labia lips etc are ugly, why would you want to expose them ?"

Hmm. Not sure what that says about body image.

madlentileater · 09/04/2009 11:51

quite.
I'm sorry, it IS a feminist issue and NOT just a matter of personal taste.
OK it isn't up there with employment rights but it is still part of the bigger picture in which women feel they have to go to ridiculous lengths to gain male approval. And why do they need male approval?
because this is a patriarchal world in which men have power and women don't. Isn't it one woman a week killed as a result of DV?
I'm not saying there's a continuum, rather it's a complex pattern and all these things are different aspects of the same- that men (overall, as a group) have power and women don't.
And DON'T mention Thatcher. Just look at parliament, the judiciary, anywhere else riches and power are concentrated.
When men and women are equally likely to mutilate their bodies on grounds of appearance, then I'll believe it's a matter of personal preference only. But to be honest I can't envisage a truly egalitarian society wher people felt the need to radically alter their bodies on a routine basis.

BonsoirAnna · 09/04/2009 12:06

Why is removing pubic hair about male approval?

Like I said earlier, for me it is about my personal hygiene and my sexual pleasure.

CharleeInSpring · 09/04/2009 12:07

I have a thin strip - i don't know what that style is called.

But............. I have a bodyhair phobia, yes im a freak i know but the thought of body hair makes me gag, on men and women, it has nothing to do with Porn as i don't watchi it and never will. Trust me, if i am about to have a bath for instance i shall get my tweezers and carefully pick each stray hair that may be lurking before i get in. Its murder on the days DP shaves his head belive me!

madlentileater · 09/04/2009 12:11

people were perfectly healthy and enjoying sex plenty without shaving their hair off!
I say it's about male approval because heterosexual women do it....and it's something that's only visible to their sexual partners.

BonsoirAnna · 09/04/2009 12:12

Taking your pubic hair off isn't about how it looks but about how it feels - to yourself.

sincitylover · 09/04/2009 12:32

When first met my exH in early 90s I removed all of mine once - no porn involved - it was a mutual thing and turned us both on. But it was a one off.

Then more recently I have started to remove it again. The feel of it turns me on and it also turned exbf on as well. To me the idea of sex like that is more well sexy. It's all in my head which is connected to the physical thing.

Also prefer it if I'm having a session with BOB (battery operated boyfriend).

It also feels more hygienic and clean to me as well. I just prefer it.

I consider myself to be a feminist but I also like to look good and don't mind pleasing a man as long as it's reciprocated.

eg I would ask a man to grow stubble for me

Vulgar · 09/04/2009 13:43

I did it once when I was a student . . a bf suggested me and I was up for trying it BUT . . .

I felt both FAT and infantile with no hair and I was really, really slim at the time. I was surprised how much fat there was on the pubic mound.

Have never done it again. Keep it tidy or occasionally shave a landing strip. too much of a coward for waxing. i am in my mid 40's by the way.

feel really that teenagers are under so much pressure nowadays.

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