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Original poster

So this whole minge topiary business...

180 replies

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 07/04/2009 13:56

Does everyone do it these days?
Being an unreconstructed 80s feminist, I am a bit bemused by the fact that it seems to be taken for granted that everyone routinely waxes their fanjo.
Removing, between May and October, any hair that was visible between knicker elastic and knees, counted as perfectly acceptable pubic grooming until the mid-Nineties at least.
But now, apparently you need to look like a prepubescent child to be appropriately groomed.
Is this another of the long line of 21st-century battles feminism has lost?
Or am I the one that's losing it?

OP posts:
YanknbeforetheCockcrows · 07/04/2009 18:04

If I had nice fanjo hair that stayed within its boundaries, I'd be happy. But PCOS has given me pubes halfway to my knees and a hairy bum, so I feel better having the front trimmed close (grade 2 on my lady trimmer) and the rest waxed. Shaving leaves stubble and rash.

I honestly don't do it to look like a porn star. I'm way too fat to aspire to that! I find it more comfortable and it means less toilet paper bits and cling-ons (it's like velcro down there, I'm telling you!).

Stupid SPD means I can barely open my legs. Can't get the trimmer in there properly and wouldn't be able to get in any of the necessary positions for waxing, so I'm stuck with it for a while!

chocolepew · 07/04/2009 18:06

Why is it cleaner? Did you get regular bouts of lice . Lol at "I was cold". Didn't you wear your knickers?

IcantbelieveImForty · 07/04/2009 18:06

I'm curious as to how the sex is better ? does the man have to shave his too ? I think it's all a mind thing, getting turned on because the guy is either turned on (but aren't they anyway) or you think he's especially turned on ?

After horse riding & 2 babies, mine's much better HAIRY !!!

ChasingSquirrels · 07/04/2009 18:07

I never do anything to mine, I am quite happy with it and I don't give a toss what anyone else might think (not that anyone is seeing it atm anyway).

Ninjacat · 07/04/2009 18:16

I've had this discussion several times recently. My partner says he hates the shaved look, too child like and not a turn on but I have plenty of friends who "garden" as one called it the other day.
Me I shaved it off once but I was quite repulsed by the way it looked so never did that again.
Isn't there a chapter on if you love women you have to love pubic hair in the Vagina Monologues? Just something I remember from my youth. bwink

Ninjacat · 07/04/2009 18:18

just trying to get the hang of the smileys

madlentileater · 07/04/2009 18:35

what spidermama said.
if women choose to do this, obv up to them but I just don't buy that it's cleaner or that sex would be better
that's how we're supposed to be!!!
have just asked dp he is of the opinion that it's a matter of personal choice and probably harmless, albeit a bit weird, but he is just a wet liberal

Spidermama · 07/04/2009 18:42

When we come of age and enter puberty, we grow hair. Hairless fannies = young girls or very old ladies.

To me hairy fannies and sex go together. HairLESS fannies and sex are a disturbing combination with which I am deeply uncomfortable.

greenelephant · 07/04/2009 18:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

madlentileater · 07/04/2009 18:44

you see, I would look very askance at any man who expressed a preference for bald fanjos

Original poster
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 07/04/2009 18:44

I'm still waiting for someone to explain just how a bald fanjo makes sex better?
Any ideas anyone?

OP posts:
Spidermama · 07/04/2009 18:48

Ladyglen surely it's simply to do with being able to better see the goings on down there. Again it comes from porn. I prefer to feel, though dh is quite visual and likes to see it all happening.

Lentileater I too would shun a man who was turned on by a bald vestibule.

KayHarker · 07/04/2009 18:49

I presume it's down to the clitoris being a little more exposed? Perhaps the flesh is more sensitive because it doesn't have a coat of fur, like a bald head is a bit more sensitive than a hairy one?

I'm guessing here, because it wasn't my experience that it was better.

traceybath · 07/04/2009 18:51

But during puberty we get hair on our legs/under our arms and the vast majority of us remove that for aesthetic reasons.

Re the sex - think its just more intense really but obviously varies from individual to individual.

paolosgirl · 07/04/2009 18:51

A bit of trimming is fine, but the whole lot off is too gross for words - and how can sex with so much regrowth be so fabulous?!

Did anyone see the sex education programme on channel 4 I think it was, when they went into a school? Very depressing viewing, with the teenage boys having had so much exposure to porn via the internet that they found fanjos with hair repulsive. On the flip side, the girls felt under pressure to remove it to 'please' the boys. DH and I had a conversation about this the other night, and he assured me that he prefers some hair to the shaved/waxed look on a woman.

Ninjacat · 07/04/2009 18:52

No I really don't get the (no hair) = (better sex) equation, it just doesn't add up.
Maybe it's just some women feel less inhibited when they're bald?

Original poster
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 07/04/2009 18:53

Oh is that all?
Faintly disappointed.

OP posts:
greenelephant · 07/04/2009 18:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 07/04/2009 18:55

Sorry, that was to Spidermama.
Don't get the more intense thing, why should it be? And my clitoris hasn't got buried in the undergrowth yet.

OP posts:
YanknbeforetheCockcrows · 07/04/2009 18:55

I'll take a stab at the 'bald fanjos=better sex', even though I DON'T have a bald fanjo, just a closely trimmed one.

I think it's for a couple of reasons:

  1. Less hair means the wetness doesn't get absorbed by the hair.
  2. Less hair makes the whole area more sensitive.
  3. Less hair means it doesn't get in the way of partner's pelvis rubbing against clitoris during penetrative sex.

This is just my experience, and I don't think it's all in my head. Fair enough if you don't believe it, I'd say you can't know if it will be any different if you haven't tried.

hotcrosspurepurple · 07/04/2009 18:56

it's mine and I'm keeping it
and I do agree that hairless seems to equal young and childlike, a slightly worrying trend

Original poster
LadyGlencoraPalliser · 07/04/2009 18:57

Traceybath - we remove it because we have been conditioned to believe that we are not proper 'feminine' women if we don't. That is a cultural pressure to conform to a particular aesthetic ideal. I was wondering when and why that pressure started to be applied to the bits that are not generally on view to the public gaze.

OP posts:
Spidermama · 07/04/2009 18:59

I find I like the slight barrier or softening created by hair.

I wonder why men don't feel the need/aren't under pressure to shave.

YanknbeforetheCockcrows · 07/04/2009 19:01

Gay men are definitely under pressure to shave and wax!

paolosgirl · 07/04/2009 19:05

I did once have a boyfriend who presented me with his very closely shaved bits - it was the funniest looking thing ever, and my laughter probably didn't do much for the proceedings