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Yes,I know,none of my business

405 replies

Idayatatime · Yesterday 14:38

Last night DH & I enjoyed a rare night out. As we were waiting in the queue for our taxi home two attractive girls who couldn't have been more than 18 got out of the taxi & headed across the road to a local nightclub. As they emerged from the taxi I couldnt believe it.I am not exagerating when I say one of the girls was wearing a skirt that was so tight & short her bum cleavage was totally visible. I find this offensive & can't believe a girl would leave the house dressed like this. I believe its nobody else's business how a girl wishes to present herself but I can't understand why anyone would agree with this particular look.

OP posts:
ladychatterleyscook · Yesterday 23:40

Idayatatime · Yesterday 23:27

A man will look. It all depends on the amount of flesh a woman gives them to look at. If it is bum cheeks that appears to be the fashion today then so be it. I don't apologise for saying no relative young daughter of mine would leave the house looking like that.

No daughter of mine would ever leave the house like that either because they would have standards.
But then no daughter of mine has ever been interested in going "pubbing and clubbing". Plenty of activities for Uni students to do without pouring a load of drink down their throats and making a fool out of themselves.

Nursegladys2 · Yesterday 23:41

As I get older, I tend not to concern myself, with what others look like. People might look at me, in my leopard print, and leather skirt, fishnets and DMs and think "bleeding hell", (and not in awe of my style) but that's a "them" problem. The only thing I get a bit sad about, is that some folk just don't dress up any more, Joggers, trainers, hoodie, for a night out. But then, I'm old, and that seems to be the fashion. My personal opinion, is life's too short.

OhTheCowsInTheMeadowGoMoo · Yesterday 23:48

Idayatatime · Yesterday 23:09

I'd be more concerned if he didn't

Eh?!
Your posts just get worse 😁
Why would you be concerned if he didn't gawp at women with their arses out? Say what you mean.....

OhTheCowsInTheMeadowGoMoo · Yesterday 23:50

Idayatatime · Yesterday 23:27

A man will look. It all depends on the amount of flesh a woman gives them to look at. If it is bum cheeks that appears to be the fashion today then so be it. I don't apologise for saying no relative young daughter of mine would leave the house looking like that.

You didn't answer the question there though, did you?
Why would you be concerned if he didn't have a gawp?

TheFriendlyCabbage · Today 00:08

Why does female empowerment always involve wearing as few clothes as possible? Those mothers on this thread who say they fully expect their daughters to be doing this in 10 years time, like aren’t I so cool and enlightened, no you will have raised someone who thinks it is okay to flash their arse (and sometimes more) to all and sundry. If you have sons hopefully you will be as equally as encouraging to them to walk around with their arse hanging out and the top of their dicks showing. Flashing is flashing. This mantra about everyone should wear what they want. No actually, they shouldn’t, not if they are subjecting others to the sight of their private parts on display.

ladychatterleyscook · Today 00:24

TheFriendlyCabbage · Today 00:08

Why does female empowerment always involve wearing as few clothes as possible? Those mothers on this thread who say they fully expect their daughters to be doing this in 10 years time, like aren’t I so cool and enlightened, no you will have raised someone who thinks it is okay to flash their arse (and sometimes more) to all and sundry. If you have sons hopefully you will be as equally as encouraging to them to walk around with their arse hanging out and the top of their dicks showing. Flashing is flashing. This mantra about everyone should wear what they want. No actually, they shouldn’t, not if they are subjecting others to the sight of their private parts on display.

"Flashing" is an offense for women as well as men -

www.police.uk/ro/report/rsa/alpha-v1/advice/rape-sexual-assault-and-other-sexual-offences/indecent-exposure-flashing-offending-public-decency/

AlonsoMosley · Today 01:03

InLawTwats · Yesterday 15:13

How do you feel about the burka, OP? I assume you’re against that too……. which would be a double standard.

What do you your clothes look like?

How do you feel about the burka, OP? I assume you’re against that too……. which would be a double standard.

Wait - so disliking extremes is a double standard now?

AlonsoMosley · Today 01:04

LaurieFairyCake · Yesterday 15:19

I don’t like seeing other peoples arses anywhere.

Thong bikinis on the beach I also dislike, it’s just so much flesh. Totally fine with naked saunas as there’s a cultural reason for them but can’t do with seeing arses in public

They are usually the really ugly arses too...

AlonsoMosley · Today 01:16

TheLastSilverSaint · Yesterday 15:53

Why does there have to be a limit to ‘what girls show’? And why does that limit have to be the one you choose?

I find this offensive

So what? That’s not anyone else’s problem.

Why does there have to be a limit to ‘what girls show’?

As a theoretical question, there should be no limits.
But - we don't live alone. So, that freedom to parade around without limit to ‘what girls show’ depends entirely on the rest of the society agreeing that they have that right.
As I said before, it is foolish in the extreme to delude oneself or pretend that it does not matter.

AlonsoMosley · Today 01:29

grindergirl · Yesterday 18:59

Nothing much shocks me so I wouldn't raise an eyebrow about teenagers going out flashing their arses. What is depressing is the follow-the-herd conformity of it. For teens, it's now as if individuality (both in dress and other aspects) is to be feared rather than celebrated.
I have a picture of snotty-nosed 11 year old boys on the bus, craning their necks to get a better view. If that's the intention, crack on!

What is depressing is the follow-the-herd conformity of it. For teens, it's now as if individuality (both in dress and other aspects) is to be feared rather than celebrated.\

But teens have always moved as a herd. They have never been individuals. The whole point of teenager years is that the "payoff" for all the crap they go though is their individuality. They grow into it and it is the end of the process.

The Goths, the Emos, the punks, the preppy ones, the this, the that. The TV show Derry Girls had a brilliant quip that caught it all - where one teen says to the other "I am NOT going to be an individual on my own..."

HatethedarknightsQW · Today 06:04

I remember 30 years ago, hankies on the top half and basically a thong were all the rage. It’s nothing new. I didn’t myself as I didn’t have the body confidence. I was in Liverpool a few weeks ago with DH and 8 was intrigues by what some of the girls were wearing….but they are young and that’s what a lot of youn* things do.

PhoneCase · Today 06:18

I always wonder where the girls parents are when they're dressed like this ie in their life, single parent family etc. My dad wouldn't have let me leave the house, even over the age of 18, exposing my private bits to the world. My mum wouldn't have allowed it, either. I never snuck out and dressed this way, either. It's not something I can relate to and it is shocking to see just how much is on display but it's not me and not my problem, I guess!

Stormyrose · Today 06:25

Idayatatime · Yesterday 23:09

I'd be more concerned if he didn't

At 18 year old women? What’s wrong with you.

Toodarktooearly · Today 06:37

Passingthroughagain · Yesterday 19:15

Wow, so any girl who wears a short skirt or shows off her cleavage is a whore, not decent, won't bag a nice man.

How appallingly judgemental, OP. I'd say it's better to walk around showing off your arse than walk around with a stick up it.

P.S> Your DH might've shaken his head but I'd bet a million quid he had a sneaky gawp.

Nasty, not what was said and speaks volumes about you and your marriage if you have one.

chichi001 · Today 06:49

PhoneCase · Today 06:18

I always wonder where the girls parents are when they're dressed like this ie in their life, single parent family etc. My dad wouldn't have let me leave the house, even over the age of 18, exposing my private bits to the world. My mum wouldn't have allowed it, either. I never snuck out and dressed this way, either. It's not something I can relate to and it is shocking to see just how much is on display but it's not me and not my problem, I guess!

My mum and dad were there, shaking their head bemusdedly, knowing I looked a bit of an idiot but also knowing that I was an 18-25 year old woman, at university and that they couldn't hold me hostage until I changed my outfit. They knew that other than questionable clothing choices aside, I was a sensible girl, going out on a night out with my friends and long term boyfriend.

pastadish · Today 07:28

Idayatatime · Yesterday 14:45

Ok,I was shocked and I'm perfectly enitled to feel like this. Posters share far worse Absolutely nothing wrong with a short skirt but surely there has to be a limit to what girls show on a night out or is nothing off limits nowadays.

Edited

Limits are not decided by you. You only limit your own skirt length not other people’s. I think if your husband wasn’t present to get a good look you wouldn’t actually care too much.

LivelyAquaPoster · Today 08:33

Such irony, the vitriol by women directed at OP.

Also ironic how women's 'argument' Women have always sexualized themselves, good on them, I encourage my teen girls to do so because they're entitled to do whatever makes them feel good for the moment is a deeply conservative mindset under a revised veneer - still desperately trying to fit the societal mold as ever.

1. Predators look for ease, not outfits.
The data shows that rapists don’t care about short skirts; they care about who is an easy target (usually a familiar one!). That’s why women in baggy sweatpants get attacked just like anyone else. But in public spaces, a highly exposed outfit does create an immediate target for opportunistic groping. Pretending clothing has zero impact on physical vulnerability is just denial.

2. "Choice Feminism" has become a shield for hyper-sexualization.
There is a massive push by a specific group of women to normalize sexualized clothing, even for young teens. Any female critics get put down (irony much?). These women claim they are doing it "just for themselves and not the male gaze," completely ignoring that they have been conditioned by an ever-present multi-billion-dollar influencer and porn culture.

3. The "Main Character" delusion.
Social media has given people a massive "center of the universe" mindset. They think they can post or wear highly sexualized things in a total vacuum, along with an entitlement mentality. But we live in a society. When you flood the public baseline with hyper-sexual imagery, you're co-shaping this environment.

4. Group choices create group consequences.
If a predator gets wound up by a hyper-sexualized environment and then goes out and attacks a girl minding her own business in a winter coat because she was a safer target, she is absorbing the risk. The individualist crowd screams "my body, my choice," but they flatly refuse to admit that their choices have massive, dangerous ripple effects on the collective safety of all women.

Hotdogsandfries · Today 08:38

LivelyAquaPoster · Today 08:33

Such irony, the vitriol by women directed at OP.

Also ironic how women's 'argument' Women have always sexualized themselves, good on them, I encourage my teen girls to do so because they're entitled to do whatever makes them feel good for the moment is a deeply conservative mindset under a revised veneer - still desperately trying to fit the societal mold as ever.

1. Predators look for ease, not outfits.
The data shows that rapists don’t care about short skirts; they care about who is an easy target (usually a familiar one!). That’s why women in baggy sweatpants get attacked just like anyone else. But in public spaces, a highly exposed outfit does create an immediate target for opportunistic groping. Pretending clothing has zero impact on physical vulnerability is just denial.

2. "Choice Feminism" has become a shield for hyper-sexualization.
There is a massive push by a specific group of women to normalize sexualized clothing, even for young teens. Any female critics get put down (irony much?). These women claim they are doing it "just for themselves and not the male gaze," completely ignoring that they have been conditioned by an ever-present multi-billion-dollar influencer and porn culture.

3. The "Main Character" delusion.
Social media has given people a massive "center of the universe" mindset. They think they can post or wear highly sexualized things in a total vacuum, along with an entitlement mentality. But we live in a society. When you flood the public baseline with hyper-sexual imagery, you're co-shaping this environment.

4. Group choices create group consequences.
If a predator gets wound up by a hyper-sexualized environment and then goes out and attacks a girl minding her own business in a winter coat because she was a safer target, she is absorbing the risk. The individualist crowd screams "my body, my choice," but they flatly refuse to admit that their choices have massive, dangerous ripple effects on the collective safety of all women.

So women need to change their behaviour/dress sense/style to protect all women from rapists, predators, gropers to make the world safer for all women?

Stormyrose · Today 08:40

LivelyAquaPoster · Today 08:33

Such irony, the vitriol by women directed at OP.

Also ironic how women's 'argument' Women have always sexualized themselves, good on them, I encourage my teen girls to do so because they're entitled to do whatever makes them feel good for the moment is a deeply conservative mindset under a revised veneer - still desperately trying to fit the societal mold as ever.

1. Predators look for ease, not outfits.
The data shows that rapists don’t care about short skirts; they care about who is an easy target (usually a familiar one!). That’s why women in baggy sweatpants get attacked just like anyone else. But in public spaces, a highly exposed outfit does create an immediate target for opportunistic groping. Pretending clothing has zero impact on physical vulnerability is just denial.

2. "Choice Feminism" has become a shield for hyper-sexualization.
There is a massive push by a specific group of women to normalize sexualized clothing, even for young teens. Any female critics get put down (irony much?). These women claim they are doing it "just for themselves and not the male gaze," completely ignoring that they have been conditioned by an ever-present multi-billion-dollar influencer and porn culture.

3. The "Main Character" delusion.
Social media has given people a massive "center of the universe" mindset. They think they can post or wear highly sexualized things in a total vacuum, along with an entitlement mentality. But we live in a society. When you flood the public baseline with hyper-sexual imagery, you're co-shaping this environment.

4. Group choices create group consequences.
If a predator gets wound up by a hyper-sexualized environment and then goes out and attacks a girl minding her own business in a winter coat because she was a safer target, she is absorbing the risk. The individualist crowd screams "my body, my choice," but they flatly refuse to admit that their choices have massive, dangerous ripple effects on the collective safety of all women.

As women it is absolutely right for us to stand up and say no to the judgement, fury, envy and misogynistic slurs the op aimed at these young women and we will not be silenced,

StarlightLady · Today 08:40

Stormyrose · Today 08:40

As women it is absolutely right for us to stand up and say no to the judgement, fury, envy and misogynistic slurs the op aimed at these young women and we will not be silenced,

This.

LivelyAquaPoster · Today 08:43

Hotdogsandfries · Today 08:38

So women need to change their behaviour/dress sense/style to protect all women from rapists, predators, gropers to make the world safer for all women?

If that is genuinely what you got from my message then I can't help you.

StarlightLady · Today 08:47

LivelyAquaPoster · Today 08:43

If that is genuinely what you got from my message then I can't help you.

That is exactly what l got from your message too. And it would appear at least one other poster.

LivelyAquaPoster · Today 08:48

Stormyrose · Today 08:40

As women it is absolutely right for us to stand up and say no to the judgement, fury, envy and misogynistic slurs the op aimed at these young women and we will not be silenced,

Speak for yourself.

"As women" - funny that, as a woman, I never say or think in a category of 4+ billion humans. Maybe because we're...not a homogenous mass? Radical idea, I know.

Hotdogsandfries · Today 08:49

LivelyAquaPoster · Today 08:43

If that is genuinely what you got from my message then I can't help you.

I don’t think I need help.

Every passage you wrote or copied from somewhere is woman can do X but it means Y will happen to someone else.

Stormyrose · Today 08:57

LivelyAquaPoster · Today 08:43

If that is genuinely what you got from my message then I can't help you.

It’s what most of us got.

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