Would you rather have a curvy or skinny figure?

[itstimeforwami6]

Say like size 14 but curvy or size 10 but no arse and just like a stick.

No, I won’t “give it a rest” while there are people throwing insulting comments around about slim women which are just as unpleasant, spiteful and potentially damaging as comments made about those who are overweight.

People need to be called out on this hypocrisy every single time they do it and insult slim women with words like “thin”, “stick”, skinny” or “lanky”, to make themselves feel better. It is not acceptable.

I will continue to call it out every time I see it because surely anybody over the age of 5 should know it isn’t acceptable to make such vile comments about other womens’/ girls’ bodies, or anyone’s body at all.

No.

When people stop thinking they can insult slim women but being aghast at people insulting overweight women, then I will not need to point out their hypocrisy.

Until then, I’ll continue to point it out every single time.

The spitefulness of some of the comments on these threads is shocking. Notably, all of the derogatory terms have been aimed at slim women: I’ve not seen anybody using equivalently insulting words to describe overweight women, like “chubby” or “fat” or “heffa” or “hippo”.

Nobody should be using insulting words to describe other people’s bodies. When people stop doing that, then I will be able to “give it a rest”.

Not to mention that the most stupid thing about this comment is that by endorsing people commenting on other people’s bodies if it suits you, you are perpetuating the very nastiness that overweight people often suffer, so making it worse for them as well.

I really can’t believe that grown adults think it’s acceptable to make these kinds of comments about anyone else’s appearance and would call it out in person if I ever saw it as well (and have done previously).

People who are encouraging body shaming of slim women are making things worse for ALL women because by joining in with the unpleasantness, they are perpetuating the idea that body shaming is acceptable.

You can’t have it both ways.

As the mother of a naturally slim and tall girl who is young still and very vulnerable, and having been on the receiving end of such spite in my teens and early 20s myself from girls who were more heavily built than me, this spitefulness needs to stop.

If people want a respectful environment then it must go both ways. I went to 5 different secondary schools and never witnessed anybody abusing overweight girls (although of course anecdotally I know this happens), but plenty of times I saw overweight girls abusing girls who were naturally slim using very similar terms to those I have seen on this thread. One of my friends developed a very severe eating disorder as a result of such bullying comments about her body by larger girls and ended up in hospital for months as a result.

I had hoped things had changed. I thought body shaming was now not acceptable. If so, that applies to everyone, whether large or small.

I urge all posters on the thread who have used spiteful terms like “thin”, “skinny”, “lanky”, “stick” etc to think about their behaviour and words and stop perpetuating such damaging and nasty behaviour. Surely anybody who would not like people to make spiteful comments about their own body should be able to have the empathy to understand why they shouldn’t do this to other people either? My 5 year old understands this.

No need to call people a ‘stick’.

Exactly

Exactly.

I'm pretty sure it was deliberately provocative.

I actually pity your daughter.

....For having a mum like you.

I apologise blackswandays, what I said was mean.
BUT you are hard work.
Think yourself lucky to have a slim and tall daughter. It brings in problems, of course, but she has

access to better health,

A life of little or no dieting

Access to really nice clothes

Access to better jobs

Access to a larger pool of men.

The above aren't given to fat women

Horrible comment

What a spiteful comment.

Do you care to explain why?

Thank you. It was incredibly nasty and unnecessary. I’m not sure what’s so terrible about being protective of a vulnerable little girl who is autistic and happens to also be naturally tall and slim so is going to be an obvious target for this kind of spite when she reaches her teens.

I’m guessing that poster won’t explain her own spitefulness. Her comments remind me of the girls who subjected me and friends to similar when we were at school. Those who shout the loudest about fat shaming are usually those who are the most guilty of such hypocrisy.

I must say, this is actually really dismissive of fat people.

I’m a high earning, high achieving woman, with a wonderful partner and family. I have out-earned every partner I’ve ever had, have a degree and a Masters, and have been in
senior management roles since I was 26.

I have been single for all of 6 months in my adult life, and have always been able to dress well and accommodate for my size.

I was almost 18 stone a few months ago and had all of those things then too.

Thank you for your apology. Your caveats, however, make it rather hollow.

As I said earlier in the thread, you have no ideawhat struggles other people have. My daughter is autistic so has plenty. She masks like superhuman though, so the larger girls envious of her figure who are likely to be spiteful to her during her teens will have no idea about the damage they are doing or the trauma she’s been through already. They will not know how she comes home already crying after school when people say nasty things because of her lack of self esteem. They will not realise how autistic girls are more than ten times more vulnerable to sexual assault, suicide, depression, etc, regardless of her build.

You cannot be nasty to people just because they have one thing that you envy. There will always be people with more than you and less than you in all aspects of life and it is not an excuse to take out your issues on them: it’s completely unacceptable.

You can call me “hard work” for pointing this out if you like, but you really should examine your behaviour and think about the impact it can have on other people, even if on the surface it appears to you that they have something you envy in one aspect of their life.

That is also a good point. This poster’s anger seems to stem from an idea that overweight people are repulsive and doomed to a life of misery and that is quite clearly not the case if you look around you.

Curvy, but I have a 36, 25, 37 figure and am a size 10.

Skinny every day of the week.

but this whole thread is framed really poorly and the derogatory terms used for skinny body shapes is unnecessary.

if I posted that I’d rather have a no arse boys frame rather than flabby belly rolls, people would be appalled.

Stick thin & toned. No desire to be even slightly “curvy”, I shudder at the thought. Personal preference, some people can certainly pull off curvy, just not me.

Btw size 10 is not thin unless you’re really tall.

I don’t think anyone is surprised that fat people can have good careers, find a partner and have a family? Most adults in the country are fat, so of course being thin isn’t a prerequisite to getting laid and procreating.

The only non-medical disadvantage I can see to being fat is less friendly treatment by (some) strangers. All the other claims are a nonsense.

Absolutely.

I wouldn’t claim I’ve never had any bullying or judgment for being overweight, of course I have.

But aside from that (quite serious at points) issue, and the impact being obese has had on my health, it hasn’t limited my life opportunities whatsoever.

As has been pointed out, slim women are often on the receiving end of unkind treatment from people as well. You can see far more of that even on this thread than vice versa. The only real issue is the health issue which is a serious but personal matter, so someone else’s body isn’t something anybody should be making a comment about unless they happen to be that person’s doctor.

I agree with your general point however, “skinny” is one of those very insulting and derogatory terms to describe slim women which you are referring to and which needs to stop being used, unless overweight people are happy to be called “chubby” etc in return.

Personally, I have no desire to be a chubby fatso.

It's not very nice to insult people's body shapes, is it?

It’s all about health for me and speaking for myself I’m not healthy at size 14. I’m currently an athletic build size 10 and I’m fine with that. I’m a long way off being stick thin and I’m closer to the top than the bottom of my BMI range.

OP a size 10 is pretty unlikely to be stick thin. Maybe a size 6?