OMG, I could actually cry.

[YouDontKnowBoutBenom]

Took dog for a walk and just had some Leopard print wide leg pants, black sandals and a black band tee.

DH took some candid photos of me and just sent them over whatsapp.

Jesus Christ :( I look awful. I look so old. So tired.

I'm 41. 5ft5. 9st.

I look ill, I look hunched. My hairs a state.

I look about 60 years old.

What the hell has happened to me :(

I'm 41 and at 40 really noticed a difference in my appearance. I'm not heavy, but I've lost a little weight in the last year, got a bit of baby botox, and recently cut my long dyed blonder hair to be a long bob with more brown bayliage. DH has been commenting recently that he can see a change and that i'm looking good (he's pretty oblivious so i'll take it). Look, you do you. I felt awful and wanted to try harder to not age as quickly. I look back to our parents at 40 and they looked 40. I've gotten hardcore into Korean skincare which is pretty cheap and amazing. It's a process. I have a friend who is ageing naturally and looks amazing, shes younger than me with greys coming into her curls and I wish I looked like her.

Bloody hell
Made me well up a bit that. Thankyou.

The wardrobe thing, yes.

I feel like anything I like I look to old in but if I try and dress my age I feel even older/more rubbish.

I liked winter because I felt nice in cord flares and a nice jumper.

But summer?! Bare legs?? Dresses?! Nothing suits me or feels right.
I feel like I don't know who I am anymore.

I used to be quite 'alternative' but I just grew out of it and anytime I try and get back there it feels like a costume now, rather than me.

If you’re that height and weight it’s not a weight loss issue at all.

its either a bad photo angle, or a toning up situation. You’re a completely normal weight.

Ive had this issue a lot since I was around 37, but I’m about a stone heavier than you.

I started doing yoga and weights and look much better. No woman is as naturally slender and firm as they were at 20. I was fucking baffled because I was exact the same height and only 11lbs heavier than my 20s when I looked great in photos.

It’s just a case of toning up and firming up a bit. I started doing yoga once a week and going to the gym for an hour twice a week to tone up. It’s not that bad.

If you’re mega short on time do 30 day shred. We’re never going to look the same at 40 as we did at 20. When I was 20 I was a size 8 and lived on snake bites, ginsters pasties and fags.

I now don’t weigh a huge amount more, only a stone or so, but you need to make more of an effort to exercise. It’s shit. The wobble just isn’t firm anymore. To be fair I don’t give a fuck too much because I’m happy and my husband is wobbly too. I’d love to look nice in photos though so I do try. 1 x yoga and 2 x gym a week makes a big difference.

Sorry for the Ted Talk 😂

Leopard print will age anyone, there ive said it.
And wide leg bottoms just no.
Op im sure you look lovely maybe it was just one of them days.

I do still get the odd double take here and there even though I look like a Cabbage Patch Doll 😃

I'm scared to start botox because I know some people that just got hooked and progressed too far with it.

Id really like a little lip filler. Id never ever want a trout pout but my lips have always been very thin and they look worse than ever.

It is. My mum took some pictures of me from across the restaurant table on my birthday about 2 years ago and when she showed them to me I was horrified at what appeared to be a gremlin staring back at me. I then got her to take some more when I’d made an effort to sit up properly and it was like night and day.

I'd give anything to be 9 stone!!!

I definitely need to do some weights.

To further explain I've actually lost 132lbs so i am probably a little saggy round the neck and face due to that rather than age but what can i do, eh.

Oh and for my haircut I had chat GPT give me images of what would look good on me, took it to the hairdressers and it bloody did! It showed me when it compared how my long hair wasn't best for meI I bet it can do that with clothes styles too.

I remember when I was 21 stepping on the scales dreading that I’d gone up to 9 stone. Aaah if only we knew eh x

a bit ageist if I many say so? I'm sorry you see a disappointing image of yourself,my posture is poor reflecting a neglectful and abusive upbringing.

Sorry, what is ageist? Feeling that I, personally, look 20 years older than my actual age in some photos? How is that ageist?

I went nuts when I "reached a number 9" The shame of it. Hilarious now.

I use this undereye cream all over my face which is not expensive, and I can feel it working. It's called Etude, and it's Korean. I honestly think it has made so much difference, I can feel it working. I'm pretty sure if I stopped the baby botox I wouldn't see much difference, whereas before I looked like a raisin. I guess also drink water, so much of it is dehydration.

Because you say you look so bad you might as well be 60.

Yes, not because 60 is terrible but because I am 41.

Im sure when I'm 60 I'd feel rubbish if I looked 80 too.

I'm 5 years older than you and 3 stone heavier. Come stand next to me if you like and you'll soon feel better 😂

Nearly 70 has its challenges for sure.

Now THAT is a drip 😆

Did you or are you having any side effects from WLI that is contributing to how you feel / look?

Oh op very few people look nice in candid photos! I rarely look nice in photos I am prepared to be in but look fine in real life 😂
delete the photos and carry on as you were!

OP I know how you feel, I am not photogenic, hate most pics of me and I end up zooming in criticising in detail. I have aged in the last 5 years, always had good skin, now I feel all the elasticity has gone (thanks to bloody menopause) and my face shows its age. I do struggle with this more than I thought I would. I’ve never been a girly girl caring about my make up etc, more outdoorsy and sporty but it really has affected my confidence.

I am trying to not be so critical, and I’d hate to think any of my friends were so critical of their photos.
Some pics are just rubbish though, and not flattering at all. I can’t imagine liking a pic of me walking my dog in my ‘whatever was nearest to throw on’ fashion 🤣.

it could just be one of those pics, but if you feel you want to mix up your wardrobe or get a hair cut/ nails etc then do it. I think it’s lovely your husband took pics of you randomly, if only we could see ourselves through the eyes of our loved ones, eh x

Some of the people in my yoga group have lovely posture and no hunch at 70 plus.