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17 year old wedding guest

135 replies

JustADressPlease · 24/08/2025 16:46

Please help me. I'm going to try and cram enough details in, so please excuse the length of the post. We are due to attend a fairly small, fairly casual (in a church but then in a nice country pub afterwards), family wedding in a couple of weeks and I desperately need help. And I say that without any hyperbole! My daughter is 17, mildly ND, has issues with labels and things she feels are constricting. She is 5'10" and a size 6-8, but prefers an 8. She has really, really loooonnng legs (thank goodness she took after her dad and didn't get my stumpy legs with podgy knees and ridiculously long back because that would make this even harder) but doesn't particularly like to flaunt them! She has a model physique and could wear a bin bag and look amazing but is happiest in a pair of leggings and a fleecy jumper. She isn't overly girly, very untrendy, doesn't like jumpsuits as they, ahem, cut her in two, is willing to wear a dress (that's kind of a "must", don't ask!), and doesn't like yellow, overly bright patterns or flowers.

I took her and friend over to the nearest big city a couple of weeks ago and she found nothing. She said she would wear a dress she already has. I've kept asking her to try it on and to show me and she kept forgetting or saying she'd do it later and then that it would be fine, but still hadn't shown me. One of her ND side effects is avoidance of things that make her uncomfortable. I forced her to go and put it on and show me this morning. It's too small, which I suspected it would be. Sigh... I have been looking for something online for the past week or so because I foresaw this coming. I have probably spent about 15 hours, maybe more, trolling loads of sites (Nobody's Child, H&M, Next, Sosander, Roman, Phase Eight, River Island and probably more that I have forgotten) and opening about a million tabs which I sat her down and made her look at this morning. Just to give me some ideas. This is the ONLY one, from Nobody's Child, which was almost acceptable and of course, now it's flipping out of stock. I have emailed and hopefully it might come back in stock, although since it's summery it's unlikely: Acceptable Dress I have looked at every option within my budget (upto £150, I'm that desperate, but prefereably, much, much less as she's likely to only wear it this once!)

So please, please, help me and suggest other stores or even better actual dresses that might be acceptable. I would be unbelievably grateful.

Thanks, one tired,desperate internetted out mum...

Pink Sleeveless Tiered Charlie Midi Dress

Pink Sleeveless Tiered Charlie Midi Dress

https://www.nobodyschild.com/products/pink-sleeveless-tiered-charlie-midi-dress-d255476pnk?cjdata=MXxZfDB8WXwxNzU4NjM3MTI0NDk2&cjevent=3e0e651580f511f083f302200a18b8fc&utm_source=CJ&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=Easyfundraising+Ltd

OP posts:
Thread gallery
22
TracyBeakerSoYeah · 25/08/2025 01:35

If it's the style, shape & fabric your DD likes @JustADressPlease & she is also ok with green as well as lemon & brown/browny & colours then I've found these:

https://www.asos.com/nobodys-child/nobodys-child-charlie-sleeveless-tiered-midi-dress-in-lemon/prd/208754331

https://www.johnlewis.com/nobodys-child-astrid-sleeveless-tiered-cotton-maxi-dress-green/p113632623

https://www.johnlewis.com/french-connection-shannon-ruched-midi-dress/p113320107

Edit: just seen that the Charlie dress in lemon yellow has already been suggested.

17 year old wedding guest
17 year old wedding guest
17 year old wedding guest
ittakes2 · 25/08/2025 07:24

try asos

also, consider a soft long column skirt in fashion and top

my nd daughter finds seamless clothes on asos

ittakes2 · 25/08/2025 07:24

ASOS DESIGN column maxi skirt in black | ASOS

mumonthehill · 25/08/2025 07:46

Cos have a bubble hem pink sleeveless dress which although not got tiers is lovely.

HesarealJacquelineHigh · 25/08/2025 07:54

FrodoBiggins · 24/08/2025 17:36

OP - ASOS has "the acceptable dress" in lemon, if she likes light pink might she go for that? Also in brown in a lot of places but I hear that's a no no https://www.asos.com/nobodys-child/nobodys-child-charlie-sleeveless-tiered-midi-dress-in-lemon/prd/208754331#colourWayId-208754332

It says in the OP that the daughter won’t wear yellow

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 25/08/2025 08:10

HesarealJacquelineHigh · 25/08/2025 07:54

It says in the OP that the daughter won’t wear yellow

I don't know how I managed to read doesn't like yellow as doesn't like blue 🤔 but I did, even though I read the rest correctly as doesn't like overly bright colours & flowers.
I blame the wine I was drinking 😵‍💫

DustyMaiden · 25/08/2025 08:53

Would it be possible to buy the dress she has and wants to wear in a larger size?

Glowstickparty · 25/08/2025 09:07

Can you order a few in a similar style to what she likes and hope she likes one? That way she can try on at home without worrying about the shops.

TheLeadbetterLife · 25/08/2025 09:20

What about this from Massimo Dutti:

https://www.massimodutti.com/gb/100-cotton-long-pleated-dress-l06682530?pelement=53559774&banner=true

Heylittlesongbird · 25/08/2025 09:47

We got a nice wedding guest dress for DD from JJ’s House, so that might be worth a look.

JustADressPlease · 25/08/2025 10:03

Just want to say the biggest thank you again for all your amazing suggestions, I actually welled up at all your lovely support and help, silly I know! I have opened every single link that everyone has suggested and opened another tab and googled for every single shop that was suggested. I have got a strong cup of coffee and am going to head down a rabbit hole of dresses. Hopefully I can eliminate some and give her maybe a dozen to choose from which should be less overwhelming than what I'm just about to face... 😂

Oh the joys of parenting an ND teenager. So thanks for all the commiserations and empathy from those that have been there. It sometimes feels like I'm on my own with these kinds of problems, so it's honestly comforting to know I'm not!

OP posts:
JustADressPlease · 25/08/2025 10:06

AtomicBlondeRose · 24/08/2025 17:27

Unfortunately strapless is a no. I also probably should have mentioned that she has quite severe pectus excavatum so bras don't fit brilliantly and low cut tops are also a no...

OP posts:
JustADressPlease · 25/08/2025 10:10

FunnyThing2 · 24/08/2025 20:26

Hi,

Your DD sounds like me. I'm 5'10" and ND.

My answer to this problem is that my parents bought me a beautiful ankle length kilt when I was 17 and I've worn it to every single smart event in the whole of the rest of my life. I've literally never had to buy a new item of clothing for a wedding or concert or anything. It's made my life so easy for these things.

It's like this:
https://www.houseofbruar.com/l-full-length-kilt-black/

Sorry, I know your DD will have very specific prefences about a lot of details, and it might not suit, but wanted to mention in case something like this might help.

The kilt was a bit pricey, but for 40 years' wear, it certainly works out cheap.

This is a lovely idea, thank you for suggesting it, but my husband's side of the family is Scottish and they have their own family tartan, which one of the brothers will be wearing. It's also unfortunately bright green and red and quite unattractive unlike yours which is a beautiful colour.

OP posts:
JustADressPlease · 25/08/2025 10:13

Nn9011 · 24/08/2025 21:56

Why does she need to wear a dress? What about some nice black trousers and a cute top? If it's a bit cooler, a soft cardigan over the top would work. Think about what she's comfy in and dress it up. Weddings are really overstimulating so it's important to make sure the clothes are as accommodating as possible.

That's what she wore to the hen do, but this is definitely a dress thing. Thank you though!

OP posts:
JustADressPlease · 25/08/2025 10:15

strawlight · 24/08/2025 22:01

Buy her a newer but more weddingy coloured version of the existing dress she likes.

That's pretty much exactly what I'm trying to do, unfortunately without success..! 😂

OP posts:
JustADressPlease · 25/08/2025 10:18

Thedevilhasfinallycaughtupwithhim · 24/08/2025 22:51

Is it possible she might not want to go and is expressing this through her avoidance in picking an outfit?

I hope the gentle tone I’m aiming for lands.

Oh, defnitely not, this is the first wedding she is going to and it is her beloved cousin's. She is beyond excited to be going but just can't mentally get over the clothes issue. But I totally understand why you may think that and your tone was very kind!

OP posts:
martinisforeveryone · 25/08/2025 10:21

I looked at this because it looks really easy to wear, not constricting and has pockets and it's plain and not cream or brown. You could cut off the piece joining the shoulders if that wasn't comfortable? and it's well under your budget.

Nadyne Dress - Masai | Official Web Shop | Fast Delivery | Secure Shopping

Does it qualify to DD as navy? I don't think so, but she might.

It's plain but the fabric is a bit more dressed up and it does say it's a 'joy to wear'
Also comes in green which seems to catch the light nicely, so I think it would look better in real life on her than it does in the pictures.

Nadyne Dress

Create an effortlessly elegant look with this dress. The dress is cut in a beautiful A-shape with a deep V-neckline. The silky, shiny viscose falls softly and comfortably over the body, making the dress a joy to wear. It's also designed with welt pocke...

https://www.masai.co.uk/dresses/nadyne-dress/1009565.html?dwvar_1009565_color=2057S&pi=3

JustADressPlease · 25/08/2025 10:23

EscapadeVelocity · 24/08/2025 23:23

Fascinating … Really hard to see why both the brown and the black and white gingham are both unacceptable, since they’re available in an 8.

Because brown and B&W gingham are not weddingy apparently...💁 Sometimes ND thought processes aren't like NT thought processes. Although to be fair, although I like both those colours, I can see why a 17 year old girl might not.

OP posts:
Sgreenpy · 25/08/2025 10:47

Try the Greenwich dress from Saint&Sofia. Various styles and colours...
It also has pockets.
I would buy a size up if she is tall x
Good luck OP

MarshaMarshaMarsha · 25/08/2025 10:47

This is a really soft material. Can be dressed up nicely with gold sandals/accessories. www.next.co.uk/style/su605140/f09134#f09134

MrsMitford3 · 25/08/2025 11:05

Also @JustADressPlease is it worth contacting Nobody's Child and see if it is in stock in a store and they can ship it to you?

Beachtastic · 25/08/2025 11:09

I know it's not what you intended, but I had to laugh that this is the first image that came up via that link... ideal for a wedding! 😀

17 year old wedding guest