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Dress for 16 year old attending a family church wedding

187 replies

lavenderjune · 29/05/2025 18:41

We have a family wedding to attend in July. I’m trying to find a dress for my 16 year old daughter. Everything I have suggested has been met with a big thumbs down. She has just shown me this dress. I really don’t think it’s right but thought I would see what others could come up with please.

Bandeau Ruffle-Trim Maxi Dress in Lemon Sherbet

Bandeau Ruffle-Trim Maxi Dress in Lemon Sherbet

Taking inspiration from Italian love stories, the Nevali dress is crafted from our premium, dual-layered mesh that’s soft against the skin and smooths your silhouette. It’s framed with a bandeau neckline that exposes your décolletage and cut to a maxi...

https://www.ohpolly.com/products/nevali-bandeau-ruffle-detail-maxi-dress-lemon-sherbet?_gl=1*1ygmyeg*_up*MQ..*_gs*MQ..&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI15TxiYnJjQMVMpNQBh1pLjpAEAAYASAAEgKe6fD_BwE&gbraid=0AAAAADcAMd229ftFZCaIi122cod2Sn2_l

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Nicaveron · 29/05/2025 18:51

Absolutely NOT! DD is 16 this is not suitable for her age or for a family wedding. It is too revealing and I wouldn’t want my granddaughter wearing that for an evening out and she is 10 years older than your DD. For the record my granddaughter wouldn’t wear this and if she did her fiancé would disapprove.
I hope you can find some that your DD and you find mutually acceptable

HonoriaBulstrode · 29/05/2025 18:52

Good Lord no! Not for a 16 yo at a family occasion.

You could try telling her guests shouldn't be attracting more attention than the bride, which that dress will.

I think there are some occasions where you have to put aside your personal tastes and just go with what is appropriate. Family weddings, funerals, job interviews come into that category.

AnnieMac89 · 29/05/2025 18:57

Oh no, sorry OP but I agree, it’s definitely not appropriate for church. Shoulders should be covered really and the high leg is a no no.

Have you looked at Nobody’s Child, they have some really nice dresses and some more modest bandeau style dresses (if that’s what she has her heart set on) that could be covered with a jacket or cardigan for in church?

DelphiniumBlue · 29/05/2025 18:57

She's 16, she should be able to find something herself, but give her parameters - shoulders covered, not too low cut, no knicker flashing. Explain to her that she needs to dress for a daytime event, even if it does go on into the evening. Explain also that she shouldn't be outshining the bride; if it's a head-turning dress then it's probably not appropriate.
What are her usual favourite shops?

InkWTF · 29/05/2025 19:02

It might not be quite right for the occasion but I can see why she likes it. If you can’t wear something like that when you’re 16 when can you wear it?

what are you wearing OP? That might help find something in keeping with a suitable feel

Sassybooklover · 29/05/2025 19:15

Definitely not suitable for a wedding, regardless of the age of the person! Even more so, as your daughter is 16. The split is up to her thighs, she'll be showing the world her knickers!! She needs to understand it's a church wedding, and the dress should be more modest.

ParmaVioletTea · 29/05/2025 19:15

Highly unsuitable. It looks cheap & tacky.

Take her to the younger versions of Hobbs or Cos - maybe Reiss? Or Mint Velvet? Or just John Lewis if you have one nearby.

Britpopbaby · 29/05/2025 19:18

Zara would be a good place for you to look.

Rtato · 29/05/2025 19:21

DelphiniumBlue · 29/05/2025 18:57

She's 16, she should be able to find something herself, but give her parameters - shoulders covered, not too low cut, no knicker flashing. Explain to her that she needs to dress for a daytime event, even if it does go on into the evening. Explain also that she shouldn't be outshining the bride; if it's a head-turning dress then it's probably not appropriate.
What are her usual favourite shops?

Why do you need your shoulders covered? I’ve never heard of that and I’ve been to a lot of weddings!! I’ve worn strapless, thin straps, thick straps - in fact I’m not sure I’ve ever had a dress with sleeves (even in winter).

I agree with flashing, that’s just a general rule, wedding or not.

How about something like this? (Apologies there is some shoulder flashing!!!)

https://www.stories.com/en-gb/product/draped-sleeveless-midi-dress-dusty-blue-floral-1224243010/

Nomorecoconutboosts · 29/05/2025 19:23

Quiz might be an option.Similar styles but perhaps more suitable for a wedding

Rtato · 29/05/2025 19:31

Or this if she wants something floofier?

https://www2.hm.com/en_gb/productpage.1238459002.html

Reugny · 29/05/2025 19:33

Rtato · 29/05/2025 19:21

Why do you need your shoulders covered? I’ve never heard of that and I’ve been to a lot of weddings!! I’ve worn strapless, thin straps, thick straps - in fact I’m not sure I’ve ever had a dress with sleeves (even in winter).

I agree with flashing, that’s just a general rule, wedding or not.

How about something like this? (Apologies there is some shoulder flashing!!!)

https://www.stories.com/en-gb/product/draped-sleeveless-midi-dress-dusty-blue-floral-1224243010/

Edited

You aren't 16.

When you are telling a teen or younger person rules it's easier if they are very clear.

Edited to add: Nothing stopping you wearing a wrap/shawl/whatever on top to deal with the changeable British weather.

Rtato · 29/05/2025 19:34

Reugny · 29/05/2025 19:33

You aren't 16.

When you are telling a teen or younger person rules it's easier if they are very clear.

Edited to add: Nothing stopping you wearing a wrap/shawl/whatever on top to deal with the changeable British weather.

Edited

But that’s not a rule?!!

PermanentTemporary · 29/05/2025 19:42

Shoulders covered in church is certainly what I was brought up to.

I agree with heading for Zara or TK Maxx.

FancyBiscuitsLevel · 29/05/2025 19:43

I agree with rules and budget and deadline. Shoulders covered (unless you know the church denomination would have a congregation more uncovered), boobs covered, most of thigh covered, “day” dress not “evening”.

minnienono · 29/05/2025 19:43

No! Not suitable for a family event and definitely not church

Hercisback1 · 29/05/2025 19:44

Shoulders covered in church is the correct étiquette. Most people tend to abide by it ime. Often using a shawl, scarf, cardi for church and then shoulders out later.

AnnieMac89 · 29/05/2025 19:45

We were always brought up to cover shoulders for church (Catholic and CofE). Most Catholic Churches abroad won’t let you in with bare shoulders.

SunComeBack · 29/05/2025 19:45

Same website, similar but without the split and added straps. I personally like the first dress, I agree the split is a little high but the bare shoulders wouldn’t bother me.

Dress for 16 year old attending a family church wedding
OurManyEnds · 29/05/2025 19:45

I think it’s lovely actually, but probably for a holiday not a wedding.

FancyBiscuitsLevel · 29/05/2025 19:47

Oh and shoulders don’t need to be covered in church by the dress - putting a jacket over it would be fine. But unless you really know it’s ok, aim for covered shoulders in church.

FancyBiscuitsLevel · 29/05/2025 19:48

Oh the dress @SunComeBackpasted with a jacket for church would be nice.

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