Impossible work wear rules

[HereKittyKitty6]

New role and dress code is conflicting! No low necks, no open toes, smart enough to work in council offices but also ‘relaxed’ enough to meet with homeless folk (some on street so plenty of walking). Have been told I look too expensive (?!). My style is quite classic and I struggle with non natural / soft fabrics.
Im pear shaped 10 (have recently developed the love handles so I do seem to look strangely curvy not nice curvy now!), petite 5ft 2, and shoes without a strap just fall off!
So far I have wide legged jersey trousers in navy, black paper bag tapered trousers, and a light cream cashmere cardigan. It’s cold/hot I’m really struggling here! Thinking of budget high street maybe? Please help!

I look forward to @TMMC1 explaining the "Nobody should have to compromise themselves to do their job" theory to hospital medical staff, who can't wear watches, hand jewellery of any kind, or long sleeves in order to minimise infection risk. Yes, that's right, they have to take off their wedding rings for work, and they do, because that's the job.

I am in a corporate environment and I do wear e.g. cashmere, as well as multiple earrings albeit they're all titanium and cubic zirconia. I'm wearing a fairly high end silk shirt today. But if I were in the OP's environment I'd cultivate a uniform of straight leg chinos or jeans with plain well fitting t-shirts, then you can keep a jersey blazer and nice shoes in the office for when you suddenly have to present to the board, and chuck on a hoodie and trainers when you need to do street outreach. Because that's the job.

@ChandrilanDiscoDroid there are obviously exceptions where a uniform is required and provided.
I meant this much bigger picture than an item. I was referring to standards, ethics, culture, pride etc sorry if that wasn’t clear.

I don't think that's the point. If someone chooses to put it on everyday, they are going for an expensive, sleek look. You don't want to rub that in someone's face. The person on the street probably had to pawn any heirloom they've had, if they ever had any at all.

There's lots of handmade, artsy jewellery that would be less inappropriate, but still quite distancing as they don't have earrings to put on or a place to store/clean them. It's reinforcing the idea that the staff think accessorizing is worth doing, and homeless people can't match that, wheras accessories shouldn't be that important.

The 'standards, ethics, culture and pride' of a job involving outreach to deeply vulnerable service users is to meet them where they are, in a way that helps them to trust your service, not to insist that you can't possibly be parted from your diamonds.

I was referring to standards, ethics, culture, pride

There is nothing ethical about wearing cashmere and diamonds while doing outreach work with street homeless people. It has nothing to do with culture. The only "pride" it could possibly involve is the sort that comes before a fall.

If the OP had said she wanted to turn up to her new senior role in a merchant bank in tatty sweats, she would have had the same reaction about appropriateness. In her scenario however, there are elements of sheer practicality and the need for sensitivity that some of us have lived experience of.

The other thing about the necklace - I’ve spent some time in prisons (professionally, I hasten to add) and you aren’t allowed anything around your neck in many of them.

I’m not convinced a necklace is even safe. I suppose if it snaps easily it might be but then there would be the risk of it catching on something and being lost.

sorry i don't understand what you mean?

edit oh did you mean "very few jobs"

Are you experienced working with homeless people? You’re making a lot of assumptions. Social care and such like are evidence led. These types of things are constantly considered and debated. Local authorities and charity organisations know the people they are working with and how best to approach people who are notoriously difficult to engage with

And having their workers dress ‘aspirationally’ isn’t it

Same where I worked in the NHS. In clinical roles, or when undertaking clinical activities, no necklaces of any kind, If ties were part of the uniform, they had to be clip on (this is a while ago, ties just got dropped from uniform.) Badge lanyards had to have a breakaway link in them.

@Namechangean no, and I’m not pretending to. However the OP is and knows their role and has been appointed to through being suitably qualified to undertake it. Taking her lead on what she has been wearing, as somebody that knows her job, then I’m supporting her decision and respect she knows how to dress so she feels safe in the circumstances she may find herself in.

She should be provided with a uniform if required and not bullied for taking care of her appearance by insecure colleagues. It would be interesting to know if the person that commented to her applied for the job and didn’t get it. 🤔

Its not bullying though is it. When she dresses that way for an interview, great. When she turns up to outreach dressed that way. Inappropriate.

She’s been given some guidance on how to dress more appropriately. My DW is a very causal dresser, in previous roles despite her hugs amount of effort she would still struggle. It’s a long story as to why, but her manager had to say what you’re wearing isn’t quite smart enough. She went back to the drawing board. She’s now in a role wear she can dress more casual, so no longer a problem but she never felt bullied, she just had to smarten herself up a bit. She was compromising her usual look and in return she was paid for it.

Uniforms will never be worn for this sort of role. Far too reminiscent of authority (e.g. police officers).

Also, I doubt someone junior would be the one raising it - far more likely to be the OP’s line manager (who may or may not have been promoted out of the role the OP currently has).

The OP should be able to ‘take care of her appearance’ without dressing wholly inappropriately for the job. Which multiple people (and at least one person who has been homeless herself) has said she is.

It strikes me that the OP is the one who is ‘insecure’ if she thinks she has to overdress.

Oh and I'm sure this advice will not be well received, but get yourself a box of latex gloves @HereKittyKitty6 (the transparent ones are the least intrusive obviously) and keep a few in your bag with wipes and hand sanitiser. Given your role, a hypothermia blanket might not be a bad idea, they are small folded.

You might think your job won't ever require you to provide urgent assistance in less than ideal circumstances, or pick things up you'd rather not, or discover that the person you are looking for is in dire straits when you find them. I don't know one colleague who hasn't and I certainly have.

When I had a similar job to yours, I used to wear Chino type trousers, ballet flats, descent T shirt or jumper and jacket or cardigan depending on the weather. Try high street fashion but I honestly can't see what the problem is with what you're wearing now. Are you sure it's not the person who told you that you're overdressing isn't the one who's intimidated or jealous? I used to work with victims and perpetrators. Victims didn't care what I wore, they just want a resolution, so focus on what your empathic levels are and I never asked someone who had just been arrested what they thought of my workwear.

I work in housing in a local authority and I have my own "uniform"
Black trousers from m&S, 5 seasalt tops and 2 cardigans. Boots in winter, ballet pumps I'm summer.

Bingo.

They said no open toes - wear fully enclosed shoes with straps. When I worked for a council I wore black trousers M&S and a black jacket also M&S and then a coloured shirt or top.

You have the best solution but some folk just love to have "problems"

Just keep a blazer & smart shoes in your office and wear trainers even you go out. And drop the cashmere

Other than the ballet pumps (possibly don’t cover enough of the foot / not sturdy enough), this sounds like exactly what the OP needs.

I’m honestly not sure what her issue was - the dress code sounds fairly easy to me.

If ballet pumps are enough for me in housing (going into some minging properties) then they're fine for homelessness workers!!

If ballet pumps are enough for me in housing (going into some minging properties) then they're fine for homelessness workers!! But as others have said, keep a pair of trainers in the office / car

Ask them to provide a uniform is the solution here!

A uniform wouldn’t meet the requirements of the job which includes appropriately engaging with the service users.

Anyone asking for a uniform in this sort of role would be showing themselves as laughably out of touch.

I would want something where if I stepped in vomit / faeces (human or otherwise) there was no risk of it getting into my shoes.

Also, if the OP is dealing with homeless people literally on the street, her feet are going to be wet through in ballet pumps.

You say it yourself, you go into properties. The OP is outside.

And, of course, needlestick injuries and broken glass. DP was most concerned about potentially being caught by abandoned needles or broken glass covered in shit from somebody with transmissible infections. He wasn't quite as bothered about tetanus as he kept up with vaccinations, but he always wore proper boots with a sole and uppers that would protect against those risks (usually DMs) first and foremost, were easily hosed off outside and reduced the likelihood of slipping on wet grass, leaves, rubbish or faeces and landing on discarded sharps or glass.