Impossible work wear rules

[HereKittyKitty6]

New role and dress code is conflicting! No low necks, no open toes, smart enough to work in council offices but also ‘relaxed’ enough to meet with homeless folk (some on street so plenty of walking). Have been told I look too expensive (?!). My style is quite classic and I struggle with non natural / soft fabrics.
Im pear shaped 10 (have recently developed the love handles so I do seem to look strangely curvy not nice curvy now!), petite 5ft 2, and shoes without a strap just fall off!
So far I have wide legged jersey trousers in navy, black paper bag tapered trousers, and a light cream cashmere cardigan. It’s cold/hot I’m really struggling here! Thinking of budget high street maybe? Please help!

Diamonds and cashmere? You need to tone things right down. There's a world of things to wear.

Are all the smart meetings in the same office? Can you keep a smart jacket or top there? Change of shoes if appropriate.

How do you get between these places/to work? By car? If so can you leave something in the car?

I agree with the advice in this post. I work with the homeless community and wear similar.

OP I'm a bit concerned that you don't seem to understand why wearing diamonds and cashmere isn't okay for working with the homeless community?! This is far from an impossible dress code. What a strange post.

I used to work in a similar environment and also with homeless. In addition to no open toes, no low cut tops, we also couldn't wear camouflage type clothing patterns or anything that might be confused for the police!

-Keep trainers at work and wear those when you go out
-Change your 'beautiful' blue bag to a back pack! Mountain madness do some good ones with several pockets
-Remove the diamond necklace/earrings and replace with a simple pair of earrings

-M&S are good for basic cardigans
-I bought some loose, linen trousers from there before their website crash
-I have 3/4 capri type cotton trousers for hotter days outside
-V neck t-shirts or 3/4 arm length tops work for me because I have massive boobs. I recently bought a nice, cotton blouse from Morrisons which was a surprise, because I never normally look at their clothing.
-For the office, would brogues or mary janes work?

I would just do black or navy trousers, black, white or navy long sleeved top and basically school shoes. This isn’t a hard task IMO

The poster mentioning female teaxhers has reminded me, my workplace is casual but I am a school governor in a private school with a business dress code, I often have to go straight from one to the other. I have some smart-ish grey trousers and will wear a plain black or white fitted teeshirt, black blazer and smart loafers for the school, out to the car and switch to hoody or cardigan and trainers to go to off to work. Simple silver jewellery and a plain black fabric bag for both. Minimal make-up, just a bit of mascara and brow powder.

Perhaps ditch the cashmere and diamonds for a start! Plain black trousers and t-shirts/jumpers? Chinos?

No tits no toes is hardly prescriptive...

I assume this is rage bait anyway, what adult has no idea what to wear to work. Just look around at what other adults are wearing, especially those who work with the homeless/out and about. Clue, it's not diamonds and cashmere 🙄

It’s not ‘jealousy or reverse snobbery’ to try and get a member of staff to stop alienating the service users.

Diamonds, pale blue leather and a light colour cashmere cardigan are wholly unsuitable clothes for the job and are probably seriously calling the OP’s judgement into question. She should be grateful someone has had a word.

I think part of the problem is you are probably wanting to look good when they basically dont necessarily want you to look good they want you to look appropriate. That might mean buying some basic cotton tops and plain black trousers and yes they may well be less flattering than your usual outfits but you have to sort of view it like a work uniform and accept that when wearing it you might not look as nice and put together as you would choose to outside work.

Tbh you sound quite tone deaf if you thought diamonds, a pale blue leather satchel and cream cashmere cardigan were a good idea when doing outreach with the homeless!!

This seems an odd post. “Impossible” work rules. You are wearing cashmere, diamonds and a fancy satchel while working with the homeless. Surely the focus needs to be on the people you are helping rather than worrying about how your classic style might be compromised? I’m sorry if I’m getting the wrong end of the stick but alternative options are surely obvious. If they are not, it’d be worth reflecting on whether you’re in the right job. Best wishes.

This thread is kind of reminding me of the time I had a meeting with a private equity executive who was wearing, as even my inexpert eye could see, at least fifteen grand's worth of cashmere and diamonds, excluding her engagement ring, which undoubtedly added a few dozen more. Fortunately, her job did not require any contact with the homeless.

Cashmere doesn't have to be expensive.
Diamonds can be cubic zircona.
A leather bag can be picked up in a market.

That’s a tough one- I would ask about the trainers- then maybe you could wear some nice fitted cotton trousers the flared type with a fitted cotton tee and a wool jumper over? That’s smart casual- try H&M they have some nice cashmere pieces too. If you are not allowed trainers maybe those pumps with the strap over not sure on the name maybe a Mary Jane pump?. Have a little look on sezane X

Also for winter, sensible coat with pockets, not a smart wool coat.

Basically if the Princess of Wales might wear it on a walkabout, it’s probably not appropriate.

I'm sure OP's homeless clients will be dying for her tips on picking up well-priced cashmere.

True but someone who wears all those things together is usually trying to look like they are wearing expensive clothes so still not appropriate.

People working with the homeless generally dress down, e.g. jeans, trainers, hoodies with a canvas rucksack. Someone in diamonds, a light coloured cashmere cardigan and a pale (not even dark) leather bag is going to stand out. And not in a good way.

The OP says she can’t dress down that much but there must be a happy medium!

Black trousers, jersey tops, casual hoodie or denim jacket for streets, smart jacket for in office. Plain black trainers (change into loafers in office if an issue)

I’m not allowed open toes at work either, summer can be tricky. Tend to go for trainers/canvas pumps or loafers.
Ditch the cashmere and go for cotton t shirts instead

@ChandrilanDiscoDroid
I was not referring to the op's homeless clients.
I was simply saying that cashmere, diamonds and a leather bag do not have to be expensive (in response to all the posters essentially saying that she is bragging).

I think this is quite often the issue with work clothes. It's like when people say that because of their figure they have to wear clothes that are deemed too revealing for work because otherwise they look frumpy. When it comes down to it, appropriate for the job matters a lot more than looking good, and if that means you look frumpy/aren't wearing your preferred style then so be it.

All true.
But as homeless people can't afford a bean, even a reasonably priced cashmere cardy, cz ring/necklace and a cheap plastic bag are out of their price range

I haven’t read any of the posts as saying she is bragging, just that the clothes are not suitable for the job. Which her employers apparently agree with if it’s reached the stage of someone talking to her about it and specifically telling her her clothes look ‘too expensive’.

I would just pop down the local charity shop and see what you can find with natural fibres. It does sound like you are dressing a bit too smart for the clients to be honest.

Just buy some plain cotton tshirts or blouses, keep a pair of trainers / flats in the office for going out to the streets when you know what you're doing each day.

Find some cotton or woolen jumpers. Stick to plain linen, cotton or similar trousers if you can only do natural materials, avoid the fancier styles and keep to simpler cuts and shapes. Leather loafers or deck shoes, plenty of lace up or Mary Jane options out there in different styles and colours.

Before you hit the streets change the "paper bag waists" for something less high fashion. Stick your expensive jewellery in your purse and leave the cashmere at your desk.

No reason you can't switch it up each day. But parading diamonds, cashmere, and valuable leather satchels is obviously inappropriate in your role or it wouldn't have been commented on.