Grey hair wobble

[DreamloverTealover]

It's almost two years since I've dyed my hair. It was always a test to see if dyeing damage is why it's not growing well. The condition is definitely better than it was but not smooth like I'd hoped.

My daughter has said she doesn't like it. She is 7 so I'm not going to run and buy dye ASAP. However I've been having a wobble anyway so really stuck on what to do. My sister is a hairdresser and says some people are wanting to go grey early now and says my natural colour is lovely. My husband says I look great whatever colour is but I don't know if this is just because he's a nice guy 😂

I've been wearing some vintage style trousers and tops recently and feel like it doesn't work with grey hair and that's saddened me too. Should I be trying to wear modern styles to outweigh the grey hair.

I know it's my own decision but wondering anyway in late thirties in same boat?

I think expertly done colour can be fabulous, but it can be so hard to get colour right, and mostly it doesn't look good or hide a person's age. When I see ordinary bad dye jobs, I presume the person is happier with that than with their natural hair. In my set, there's only one with dyed hair, so my eye is used to natural colouring, which I think is part of the adjustment. The one who colours her hair goes for a wild colour, so it's funky and vibrant. It in no way hides her age, but it really suits her.

I went grey in the pandemic. It definitely ages me and I find I have to work quite hard to look good. I loathe shopping or buying clothes so this has been a real struggle. My hair is extremely curly so it's hard to maintain or to look professional and the grey is a battle on top.

BUT

I think grey roots look worse. I think very dark dye jobs look worse. I can't afford the time or the money to get my hair done every three to four weeks at a really good salon so that's that. I had to come to terms with the grey.

It comes down to what maintenance you prefer. The stress of roots was too much for me and even with the drawbacks I prefer the ease of natural.

''@RitaFromTheRanch · Yesterday 20:43

@SantasLargerHelper · Yesterday 20:28
I'm going to be honest here and say I think grey hair really ages people. Sorry.
I agree with this, it looks bold as in I don't care what people think but hand on heart I've never seen anyone look better grey.''

I agree.

I think grey hair just makes someone's skin looks dull and washed out.

The only people I ever thought rocked grey/white hair were Meryl Streep in the Devil wears Prada and Richard Gere!

I think it is a good opportunity to work out what colour works best with your skin and get your hair coloured again. Often women are advised to go for something a bit lighter than their natural colour to brighter older skin.

I used to know someone who had dark brown hair with quite a lot of individual white hairs in it. What she did was colour it a much lighter colour, so the white hairs ended up looking like streaks and the dark brown was unchanged. Would that be a possibility for you?

Everyone's different. I think grey hair looks great on some people. My colleague has silvery grey hair and looks fantastic. I'm 50 and not yet ready to go grey. I use dark brown henna on my hair. I do find it a hassle though. I definitely wouldn't have been ready to go grey in my 30s.

I think grey hair looks as lovely as any other colour if your hair is in good condition. I've never dyed my hair since a disastrous experiment with henna when I was 16, and decided I would give myself a David Bowie haircut 😆. Once my hair had grown back to its normal light brown I never dyed it again, and never had it cut again, with just an occasional trim. Now that I'm in my mid 60s, my hair is waist length, in very good condition, and largely grey and I love the colour. I'm envious of women who have really silver or steel grey hair as I think that looks stunning at any age, and hope that mine will gradually get more sillvery as I get older.

Wow thank you for all of your replies. Just wanted to message to say thanks. I'm going to have a proper read now.

@FuzzyPuffling I really think I look faded and I'm not into make up (no time!) but the low maintenance of not dyeing has suited me.

@Lentilweaver I'll see if I'm brave enough for a photo 😂

@Influencerofcrap did you go for a similar colour or lighter when you went back to the dye?

@FuzzyPuffling its hard when reading comments but everyone has their own opinions. It's hard to decide what's right for yourself.

@TreesAtSea this is like me. Somehow at home it doesn't look too bad, but when out and about with the lighting etc I see myself and think oh no 🙈 do you think you'll go back to dye if you don't feel "you" any more?

@greygrey @greyrooted

@GreyRooted thanks for sharing. I'm glad you love it. I wish I loved mine, I wish it was a deeper / darker grey.

I love my grey hair. But I'm in my fifties and tbh I think it's my face that makes me look old, not my hair 🤣

I am grey front and top, natural dark brown at the back, and it's long. It does need a cut to shape it a little but I'm very lazy. Going grey early runs in my family (dad's side) so I spotted my first grey hair at 12. I dyed it all sorts of colours (had my "Rachel" phase too) until my late 30s when a box dye didn't take. Then I decided, sod it, I'll grow it out. It doesn't look too bad on me actually. I have stripes! 🦡. I use a purple shampoo once a week to make the silver bits shiny. I look my age, put it that way, and I don't mind.

My mum dumped the dye during the pandemic and she looks cool too, but she has a toner put in during every hair cut. Might be worth looking into.

I do think the cut makes a difference and regular maintenance. Eyebrows too, often when you go grey, your brows fade too and your features seem to dissolve.

Thank you for this, it's really helped me. I seemed to have put myself on a personal mission to not give up and go back to dye and I don't know why.

Having read a lot of you saying about colouring and blending, I'm going to look into this, Google and Pinterest!

I was always dark haired, my eyebrows still quite dark and no greys coming in there yet. I don't think I can go back to dark hair so either blending or looking at a light brown, dark blonde box dye to hope it doesn't look too dark?

Being brave and posting a pic 😬

It only ages people because we're used to all but the very elderly dyeing their hair. I just wonder why so many women fight looking older, when it's a normal part of life. Just be your age! Nobody's really fooled by a bit of hair dye.

My natural colour was dark brown (probably a 3.0), but I've gone a shade lighter each year or so, and like it best using a light brown / dark blonde shade, so a 5.0 or 6.0. . As PP have said, lighter tends to suit your skin tone more, and means roots don't show. I feel like this is more fair as, if your natural colour is light brown or blonde, the grey tiptoes politely in rather than blazing a silver trail round your roots! I only put dye on the roots, to avoid colour build-up. Because the grey isn't even, it means I get some natural tonal variation in the colour. I use semi permanent home dye. Unfortunately I became allergic to most hair dyes after a few hairdresser dye sessions - professional dyes can, I believe, contain a higher concentration of the usual allergen (PPD) than home dyes, and once sensitised I had to avoid all conventional dyes. So now I use a herbal one which is a bit of a faff, but does the job.

Yes that's how I felt

I occasionally have streaks put in but I can't cope with all over dye maintenance

And... what's wrong with looking older? More experienced? Senior, mature?

My hair is grey and I hate this assumption fed to us by society that old = bad and washed up and useless, and old female = even worse.

I agree. I grew out my dye during Covid, and lived with the grey for a year, but it just made me look old. I now have high / low lights and it disguises the grey - well, mostly - but I still know I'd look younger if I completely dyed the grey, but I can't face going back to the the six-weekly having the roots redone.

@DreamloverTealover Your hair is a LOVELY colour. Why would you even consider dying it?!

I agree. So much judgement. We’re so much older, and we’re also ‘bold’ as in we don’t care apparently. I’m 49. I’m grey. And I look 49 (I think).

Yours is very similar to mine!

I now have some baby highlights to blend the grey/white coming through with the blonde, but some toner underneath and in the ends to add interest

It's like a reverse balayage, so the roots are nowhere near as obvious now coming through. (Was previously dark roots, blonder ends, so just switched it)

Is that it completely grown out? Sorry if you’ve already said. I ask because the roots look silvery so maybe they’ll come through more. I use a purple shampoo once a week to lift yellowing from straighteners.

It looks like it’s in lovely condition though so I’d stick with it.